Today was a tough one for Olympians. First, American Judo person Nick Delpopolo accidentally ate some pot brownies and got the boot. Then news breaks that a U.S. rower had a boner during his recent medal ceremony. Now comes word that Italy's national hero and walking champion Alex Schwazer was banned from the Olympics today after he failed a drug test. The illegal substance was not disclosed.

Just over a week after calling McCain's decision to pick Sarah Palin a mistake, Dick Cheney sort of apologized. The former vice president clarified his statements to serious journalist Sean Hannity last night, saying, "the process didn't meet the standards I would like to see our candidate pursue when they pick a running mate."

From the Opening Ceremony of the London Olympics—which featured as one of its star attractions, a large-but-not-even-that-large Cruella DeVille balloon—it's been clear that these Games would be one in which people felt it was okay to go ahead and phone some things in.

After six months of an uneasy ceasefire, Sir Elton John last night fired shots at longtime scratching post Madonna during an interview on Australian television.

Human babies have long been observed to be inferior to their adult counterparts, in part because they are not old enough to compete (legally) in the Olympics, smart enough to solve Sudoku puzzles with no help, or tall enough to hand me that thing from the top shelf.

Nick "The Youngest One, Who Has Diabetes" Jonas appears to be employing the Power of Positive Thinking to transform himself into an American Idol judge.

Some asshole was arrested and beaten up by a Dutch girl in London yesterday after attempting to hit sprinter and noted polite person Usain Bolt with a bottle just before the start of the men's 100 meter final.

Radar Online is reporting that Kristen Stewart is currently holed up at producer Giovanni Agnelli's pad, where she had been "crying her eyes out non-stop" and refusing to shower.

Amanda Bynes is in the news again today for allegedly being involved in yet another hit-and-run.

A 40-year-old former Army soldier once stationed at Fort Bragg in North Carolina is the main suspect in yesterday's shooting at a Sikh temple in the Milwaukee suburb of Oak Creek.

Harry Reid's crusade to get Mitt Romney to release his tax records is akin to McCarthyism, according to Face the Nation's Bob Schieffer.

A mass shooting has occurred at a Sikh temple in Oak Creek, Wisconsin. So far, at least four people have been reported shot, including the president of the temple.

We've spent so much time focused on James Holmes and the Aurora shooting that we haven't heard much about Jared Lee Loughner, the last psychopath who opened fire on a crowd.

Oscar "Blade Runner" Pistorius made Olympics history today as the first double amputee runner to compete. He also advanced to the semifinals, so take that, two-legged runners.

We can stop badgering Mitt Romney to release more of his tax returns. It turns out he paid taxes — a lot of them — every year. So that's settled. Let's move on.

St. Kitts and Nevis sprinter Kim Collins has been booted from the 100-meter race.

M. Night Shyamalan, the once-venerated auteur who has become a running joke in recent years, will be teaming up with Buffy the Vampire Slayer writer/producer Marti Noxon in the hopes of starting fresh with a scripted television series for Syfy.

If a U.S. President takes office during a time of severe economic turmoil, it's not fair to blame him for the recession or lack of job creation. Well, as long as he's a Republican.

Hey, internet, quit complaining about NBC's terrible Olympics coverage. According to a new NBC-sponsored study, knowing the outcome of events makes people more likely to watch.

During a conference call with reporters this morning, NBC execs said archery was the hottest sport of the London Games so far, surpassing all other Olympic events in viewership.