• Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen and their boyfriends, Nate Lowman and Justin Bartha, had super evening out the other night. It involved steak, making out, tickling, and "chain-smoking cigarettes until after 4am." [P6]
• Derek Jeter and Alex Rodriguez aren't on the friendliest terms these days. Now things have turned frosty between their respective girlfriends, Minka Kelly and Kate Hudson. [P6]
• Heidi Pratt appears in the new issue of Playboy. But you won't find any nude pics of her in the magazine. She says she won't strip down completely until after she has a few "upgrades" performed by her plastic surgeon. [Us]
• Kourtney Kardashian is pregnant. So who's the father? Either she's not saying because she plans to use the news to gin up ratings for her crappy reality show, or becaue she doesn't know herself. One or the other. [E!]

• Kate Hudson is dying to have A-Rod's baby, reports In Touch: "(Hudson) just turned 30 and she's ready to have her second child," an "insider" tells the magazine. "She brought up the idea to Alex and told him that they would make a beautiful baby together, and that she would assume all financial responsibility." Sounds like a great deal, clearly. [MSNBC]
• Renee Zellweger and Bradley Cooper are no longer trying to hide their relationship. To make the point crystal clear, Bradley placed a "reassuring hand on her behind" for paparazzi photographers in Barcelona. [DM]
• Michael Douglas' son, Cameron Douglas, was busted on drug charges a week ago. Now his girlfriend has been arrested, too. Kelly Sott was nabbed after she tried to smuggle heroin to him in an electric toothbrush. Whoops. [People]

And we're not talking RBIs here, sports fans, we're talking inches. The gossip dowager is telling everyone what kind of bat Alex Rodriguez is playing with. Yes, we mean his penis!

• Madonna is taking her kids on the best summer vacation ever later this month: She's thinking about taking them to visit Auschwitz, so "they can learn about mistakes made in the past." If that doesn't pan out, she could always just invite Sean Penn and Guy Ritchie over for a visit and teach them the same lesson, couldn't she? [YNET]
• Paula Abdul announced over Twitter last night that she's leaving American Idol. True? Was she just drinking again? We'll find out soon enough. [NYDN]
• Hopeless romantic Kelly Bensimon made a move on Gerard Butler the other night, but the actor didn't reciprocate. Try your best to empathize. [NYDN]
• Great news: Ratings for Jon & Kate Plus 8 have tanked since the show came back from hiatus. Say a little prayer that this continues. [Us]
• Nominations for the MTV Video Music Awards were announced yesterday; Beyoncé and Lady Gaga came out on top, each earning nine nods. [THR]

A-Rod turns 34 today. Billionaire investor Eddie Lampert turns 47. Actor Jonathan Rhys Meyers is 32. Musician Pete Yorn is turning 35. Maya Rudolph is turning 37. Legendary TV producer Norman Lear is 87. Comedian Jerry Van Dyke turns 78. Former Olympic figure skater Peggy Fleming is turning 61. Taxi & Limousine Commissioner Matthew Daus is 41. And Nick Hogan, the scandal-prone (and recently imprisoned) son of Hulk and Linda Hogan, turns 19 today.

• Poor J. Lo. She threw a big 40th birthday party for herself over the weekend and some guests actually had the nerve to show up late! [NYDN]
• It's been a rough ride for Kate Major, the former Star reporter who said she was Jon Gosselin were in love. On Saturday, Gosselin said he was single; on Sunday, the tabloids suggested Major was a former escort. So now she's supposedly planning to get revenge by writing a tell-all. [People, NYDN, NYDN]
• In other Gosselin news, he was seen buying himself $950 wingtips over the weekend, or "two pairs of shoes for each of his kids." [P6]
• Although they've been dating for months now (and haven't exactly been doing a very good job of keeping their relationship a secret), Kate Hudson and A-Rod went public with their romance on Saturday. [NYDN]

Leighton Meester and Jessica Szohr eating lunch at Cafe Gitane on Mott Street ... Jennifer Lopez shopping at Christian Louboutin on Madison Avenue, and later rehearsing a scene for The Backup Plan at a Gray's Papaya ... Cindy Crawford arriving at JFK ... Alex Rodriguez getting into an SUV ... Tori Spelling leaving Cipriani Downtown ... Regis Philbin and Kelly Ripa leaving ABC Studios ... Robert Pattinson walking around downtown .. Chris Cooper filming a scene for Remember Me in Long Island City ... and Joe Jonas shopping with a "female friend" in SoHo.

Kate Hudson taking in a game at Yankee Stadium ... Matt Damon leaving his apartment on Lafayette Street ... Jennifer Lopez leaving her trailer on the set of The Back-Up Plan ... Alex Rodriguez signing autographs outside ABC ... Stephanie Pratt shopping with her boyfriend and friends in SoHo ... Russell Brand standing outside his hotel downtown ... Jessica Szohr walking to the Gossip Girl set on the Lower East Side ... Rachel McAdams shooting scenes for Morning Glory ... Regis Philbin walking on the Upper West Side ... and Jon Gosselin walking by himself on the Upper West Side, smoking outside P.D. O'Hurley’s Pub on West 72nd Street, and later buying a hot dog in Central Park.

• The police were called to Mischa Barton's home yesterday and she was escorted out of the house so she could be treated for some sort of "medical issue." Her condition hasn't been disclosed yet, but we're going to go ahead and assume it wasn't a case of seasonal allergies. [Sun]
• Bethenny Frankel may be giving up her spot on the Real Housewives next season so she can star in a Bravo show of her own. Neither Frankel and Bravo were willing to confirm the news, though, so we're going to keep our fingers crossed and hope this is just a crazy rumor that has no basis in reality, okay? [P6]
• Kim Kardashian almost got stranded in Africa when she couldn't locate her passport. The operative word there is "almost": Sadly, boyfriend Reggie Bush found it a few minutes later, so she was able to return to the U.S. [People]

Michael Jackson's brain was not with his body in the golden coffin, Justin Timberlake wants to write a book about golf, Jason Bateman talks addiction, Russell Brand breaks his celibacy vow and Jason Lee fights at Max Fish.

• The fashion publicist/socialite who moonlighted as a computer hacker? This is going to make for a fabulous movie. It seems Ali Wise (right), the Dolce & Gabanna public relations director, professional socializer, and ex-girlfriend of hotelier Jason Pomeranc was arrested this week for using her computer to wiretap and eavesdrop on interior designer/social butterfly Nina Freudenberger (left). The worst part? Wise was held overnight in an jail cell and wasn't given any special treatment, poor thing. [NYDN, P6]
• Wise wasn't the only nightlife fixture behind bars this week. Wass Stevens, NYC's most famous club doorman, was arrested for whacking a man with the metal end of a velvet rope outside Noah Tepperberg and Jason Strauss's Avenue the other night. Stevens says the man acted up when he was refused entry, which sounds a pretty likely scenario. [P6]

Keri Russell taking son River to the park ... Jerry and Jessica Seinfeld watching a Mets game at Citi Field with their kids ... Liv Tyler getting in an SUV outside her apartment ... Nicole Kidman shooting scenes for her new movie in Queens ... Anne Hathaway walking downtown with boyfriend Adam Shulman ... Kate Hudson walking under an umbrella in the Village ... Heidi Klum playing with her kids at a playground on Bleecker Street ... Robert Pattinson locking up a bike on the set of his new movie ... and Alex Rodriguez leaving his apartment building with a family friend.

• A new month is approaching, so it's time for Russell Simmons to drop the twentysomething model he's been dating and move on to a new twentysomething model. But there are signs the 51-year-old is maturing: Julie Henderson, age 23, has been replaced by French model Noemie Lenoir (right), who is a positively aged 29. [P6]
• A drunken Jonathan Rhys Meyers was detained by the authorities in Paris yesterday after he punched a waiter in an airport lounge. [Us, People]
• Audrina Patridge is saying goodbye to The Hills so she can take part in a new, Mark Burnett-produced reality show for MTV. [NYDN]
• Ricky Martin did not come out of the closet in an interview with a Spanish magazine the other day. He's still inside. Carry on. [Advocate]

June 15 @ 5pm At Blue & Cream clothing store. They closed the store down but my friend and I waited and got a picture with him - he is so good-looking! [Submit your own Gawker Stalker sightings to stalker@gawker.com]

• It looks like it's over for Paris Hilton and boyfriend Doug Reinhardt. Please excuse us while we go get a big box of tissues; we really weren't mentally prepared for news this upsetting this morning. [People, Sun]
• A couple of weeks ago, it was Gwynnie Paltrow who was getting blamed for setting A-Rod up with Kate Hudson. Now real estate "superagent" Adam Modlin is taking credit for brokering the transaction. Go figure. [NYDN]
• Maybe Kanye West and Amber Rose didn't break up, after all. Or maybe they did break up, but they're spending a lot of time together anyway? It's a mystery, really. [P6]
• Coco Rocha is not going to be an intern at Vogue this summer. She's just spending a lot of time there so she can "learn more about the business." [WWD]

Reese Witherspoon shopping with Jake Gyllenhaal at Marni on Mercer Street, and later leaving lunch at Bar Pitti ... Dave Matthews picking up breakfast from Peace and Love Cafe in Tribeca ... Will Ferrell watching a game at Yankees Stadium ... Nicole Kidman leaving her building downtown ... Jeff Goldblum and Rachel McAdams filming scenes for Morning Glory ... Whitney Port shopping with a friend downtown ... Djimon Hounsou walking by himself ... Denise Richards eating dessert at Fresco on East 52nd Street ... Robert Pattinson walking downtown with actor Tom Sturridge ... and Kate Hudson and Alex Rodriguez leaving 40/40 separately.

Ashlee Simpson got drunk at a party and made a spectacle of herself by screaming at Pete Wentz's ex Michelle Trachtenberg, Brad Pitt shares hygiene secrets, Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush marriage rumors swirl, and Chris Pine dumped Audrina Patridge.

• The romance between Kate Hudson and Alex Rodriguez is heating up. How does People know this? Well, A-Rod supposedly introduced Kate to some of his friends and Kate has been telling people she's a baseball fan, so it's pretty obvious, no? [People]
• Kimora Lee Simmons and Djimon Hounsou have come up with a name for their new baby: He's Kenzo Lee Hounsou, in honor of the Japanese designer by the same name. [P6]
• A woman is claiming she was attacked and left "crippled" by Sacha Baron Cohen (playing the role of Bruno) in 2007. [TMZ]
• Eminem had thousands of dollars worth of items stolen from his L.A. hotel room on Sunday night, including his diamond necklace and laptop. [NYDN]

Spencer and Heidi implode on the set of I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here, Madonna and Kate Hudson kinda almost get into a catfight, Billy Bob Thornton's daughter is charged in an infant's death, and Lori Petty spent the weekend in the slammer after getting arrested for DUI.

• It looks like it's war between two Hamptons magazines that no one actually reads: A title called Hamptonite is now accusing Devorah Rose's Social Life of destroying copies of its debut issue last weekend. Social Life denies the accusation, although when members of the Real Housewives are involved, anything is possible, really. [P6]
• In A-Rod/Madonna news, the Yankee is still dating Kate Hudson and she's already started "following [him] around." For her part, Madonna is reportedly "livid" at Gwyneth Paltrow because she blames her for setting the two up. [P6, NYDN]
• Rihanna may finally open up about the alleged assault on her by Chris Brown: Prosecutors say they'll subpoena her to appear at a June 22 hearing to decide if there's enough evidence to move ahead with the case. [People]