The landscape of American politics is littered with asininity. Anyone with even a vague knowledge of our history knows that. But the latest means to which Republicans are willing to go to derail the SCOTUS nomination of Sonia Sotomayor may take the all-time top prize. Think pigs' feet with chickpeas!

Get ready to make a few new friends this fall. The Taxi and Limousine is planning to test out a program that will allow people to share cabs with total strangers. Fun! [NYDN, NYP, previously]

Arnold Schwarzenegger was a guest on Jay Leno's show last night and Glenn Beck, Fox News' resident Barnumesque dildo, just couldn't pass up the opportunity to make fun of the manner in which the California Governor speaks, and even managed to do so quite horribly.

Whoops: Yelp signed up "SF Women Against Rape" as a sponsor of its email newsletter, then ran their ad under an insinuating headline about bicycles that read, "Put the Fun Between Your Legs." Cue the outrage!

So the other day we posted an item about Canada's "Governor General" Michaelle Jean taking a knife to a seal and eating it's heart. In a playful attempt at absurdist humor, we compared Jean to America's own lady killing machine, Sarah Palin. This did not go over well in Canada.

• The new H&M at 86th Street and Lexington opens at noon tomorrow. [AFB, Racked]
• Scarlett Johansson is replacing Penélope Cruz as the face of Mango. [WWD, SF]
• For the first time, the CFDA is tacking on a "Popular Vote Award" to this year's show. As the name implies, it will allow the public to weigh in, shockingly. [WWD]
• What's Kate Moss's novel going to be about? "A young model's life as she goes from a nobody to an A-list star." Sounds familiar, no? [NYDN]
• Marc Jacobs hosted a 30th birthday party for fiancé Lorenzo Martone last night at the not-yet-open Avenue. Julia Restoin Roitfeld and Genevieve Jones (above) were among the 150 people on hand for the occasion. [W]

Yahoo's delightfully potty-mouthed CEO dropped another one of her famous F-bombs on the Wall Street Journal's Kara Swisher at the D conference today. The Journal's been promoting the incident online, but can't seem to bring itself to air video of the cussing.

Last night, the promo for next week's Real Housewives of New Jersey said the secret to Danielle Staub's shady past could be found in an out-of-print book called Cop Without a Badge. Well, that's been tracked down and a "coke whore" named Beverly Merrill bears an awful close resemblance.

The Twitterati weren't themselves: Caroline McCarthy was mistaken for airline staff; a Guardian writer turned into one of the Stepford Wives and a professional tattoo aficionado found himself destroying art.

[Fans support their beloved Barcelona fancy football team, on their way to defeating Manchester United to win the UEFA title today, which is one of the few days Gawker will ever mention sports; image via Getty]

• Francois Payard says he'll be forced to close his Upper East Side flagship (and lay off his 74 employees) if his landlord insists on doubling his rent. [Crain's]
• Daniel Boulud's DBGB held a preview last night for industry peeps and, sure enough, loads of industry types turned up. Commoners will get a chance to try out DB's latest venture when it opens to the public on June 8. [TFB, GS, Eater]
• Ipuddo, the EV ramen spot, gets one star from Bruni in today's Times. [NYT]
• Yama on Houston has closed; the lounge Stay caught fire last night. [Eater]
• A bunch of Hamptons bouncers have been busted for dealing drugs. [NYP]
• Nobu in London still serves endangered bluefin tuna because the chefs there insist on it. Or at least that's how Nobu GM Richie Notar explains it. [TFB]

Steve Wozniak told a Wall Street Journal reporter his Apple co-founder Steve Jobs sounds "healthy, energetic," signaling the CEO will return from medical leave at the end of June as planned. The market wasn't particularly interested.

Globe-flattening mustache habitrail Thomas Friedman, who's never met a hype-spouting CEO he wasn't incredibly impressed by, is no friend of the working man, this we know. But he's currently ruining labor talks at the Boston Globe, just by being his annoying self.

[That's Kate Gosselin of "Jon & Kate Plus 8" who hates fame with her boyfriend/bodyguard at BWI, which is known as "the celebrities' airport"; image via Splash]

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If more dudes shaved their balls, that's like, thousands more razors they can sell every year. Every little bit helps. [via Adfreak]

New York's Tim Murphy paid a visit to Times Square to check out the new pedestrian mall and do a little man-on-the-street reportage. And it turns out that everyone seems to have their own idea of what the city could have done to make the space more appealing. (Some of the suggestions: adding "more greenery" to make things "more aesthetically pleasing"; setting up a snack bar; and laying down some sand for outdoor volleyball games.) But it's nice to see that you don't have to actually sit in any of the crummy plastic chairs that the city has provided. Put down a picnic blanket and fire up your iPod, and you'll forget you're smack-dab in what was once NYC's busiest intersections in no time at all! [NYM/Daily Intel]

Staff favorite Tom McGeveran has been named the *interim* successor to departing New York Observer editor Peter Kaplan. Hopefully the paper lasts long enough for him to become the full-time successor.

Noted beauty contest loser and porn model Carrie Prejean guest-hosted and Fox & Friends this morning, and she basically dry-humped Steve Doocy and Brian Kilmeade the whole time. Easy Carrie! Brian and Steve won't get you anywhere. If you want the permanent gig, you're gonna need a loofah.