Commencement ceremonies take place at Harvard tomorrow. And tensions are already running high! It seems attendees are now being advised to avoid hugs and handshakes out of concern for swine flu. [The Awl]

[The "30 Rock" actor films a scene for the Kevin Smith movie "A Couple of Dicks" in New York today; image via Splash]

In your woozy Wednesday media column: multiple music magazines die, the Boston Globe thinks it's too tough to kill, Harvard newsies can't find jobs, Surface magazine gets a cheaper office, and a report from the newspaper conspiracy meeting:

Courtroom testimony appears to have solved the riddle of why tech journalist Rex Farrance was killed in a seemingly bizarre 2007 slaying: The thieves knew about all the pot stashed in his San Francisco Bay Area home.

Darryl Littlejohn, the worst bouncer ever, was found guilty of rape and murder this afternoon after a day of deliberations. [NYT]

Remember when The Fashion Show debuted on Bravo a few weeks ago and everyone was all like, "It's a total ripoff of Project Runway!" and Bravo was all like "It is not! It's totally original," but nobody was buying it? Yea, well, since that argument hasn't worked out too well, the show hasn't exactly soared in the ratings, and Project Runway's debut is fast approaching, it looks like it's time to take a different approach.

Happy Terrorist Fist Jab Anniversary Day! On June 3, 2008, the Obamas gave each other a pound as he locked up the nomination, shocking whites everywhere. Now—as Dr. King dreamed—it's accepted. A year of Obama pounds, in photos.

Martha Graham once said that "dance is a song of the body. Either of joy or pain." Last night's New Jersey deep dive proved her sage point. There was joy and there was pain, but also there was dancing.

On Morning Joe this morning, NBC News' Chuck Todd offered his analysis of the Osama bin Laden audiotape released this morning: It's a standard political "prebuttal." Does that mean we've won the war on terror?

Just a few weeks ago, the city was supposedly experiencing an unprecedented crime wave. Apparently the NYPD turned things around in no time, since newly released FBI stats show that New York has the lowest crime rate of the 25 largest cities in the country. Of the 261 cities with more than 100,000 residents, New York ranked 246th; violent crime dropped four percent last year and murders were down 21.1 percent. So, you know, enjoy not getting murdered when you go out this evening. [NYP]

The Wall Street Journal is fronting its new "Speakeasy" website with perhaps the sultriest headcut it has ever run, a stipple portrait of hotshot young reporter Rebecca Dana. At least the paper nailed one part of it's blogging strategy!

• Stephen Colbert will be Newsweek's guest editor next week. [NYO]
• Conan O'Brien's second Tonight Show dropped 30 percent from Monday's record-setting premiere, although that was probably to be expected. [THR]
• For the third straight month, MSNBC bested CNN in the cable news ratings. Fox News remained in first place, as usual. [Daily Finance]
• More bad news for CNN: Campbell Brown returned from maternity leave this week and immediately returned to fourth-place in the ratings. [THR]
• A new Harvard Business Review study reveals that 10 percent of Twitter users account for more than 90 percent of Twitter messages sent. [AdAge]
• Jon & Kate Plus 8 is still generating obscene ratings, sadly. [AP]

Newsweek has enlisted Stephen Colbert as a guest editor in a desperate attempt for "buzz." It's totally working! Because we have obtained, via a publicist, via Newsweek's marketing team, a direct (outrageous!) quote from Colbert about his upcoming fake editorialism:

USA Network is giving away the ultimate summer accessory - the Royal Pains Summer Tote. The bag includes The Hamptons Dictionary, Kiehl's Summer Lotions Kit, a Cure Your Royal Pains T-Shirt and more essential tools, plus a Canon Powershot SD 780IS to record it all.

There are now 600 medical marijuana dispensaries operating in Los Angeles, thanks to a legal loophole. Thanks, The Recession and Attorney General Holder and, most of all, incompetent LA City Council legal staff! This procedural goof's for you, Peter Tosh.

"Rendition: Guantanamo," the British video game purportedly being developed for the XBox360 featuring a Gitmo detainee "fighting back" against his captors, has been nixed by its developer. That was quick!

Last month, San Franciscan literary figure Dave Eggers promised to personally email anyone who feared that print is dead, and cheer them up. He's done it! Here's your full Dave Eggers 'Print Lives' Reassurance Email:

Do your fingers ever begin to feel numb after spending, oh, two or three hours talking on your cell phone non-stop? You may have a new medical condition! "Orthopedic specialists are reporting cases of "cell phone elbow," in which patients damage an essential nerve in their arm by bending their elbows too tightly for too long." Unfortunately for these same specialists, the cure is not particularly complicated (or give them an opportunity to bill your insurance company for thousands): "The advice is simple: Switch hands—before it gets worse." [CNN]

Private investigator Joseph Culligan registered williamclinton.com, williamjclinton.com, and presidentbillclinton.com back in the 1990s, partly to prove the point of how easy it is to snatch up domain names. Clinton recently tried to get them back, and yesterday he lost.

How are you cutting back during the Great Recession? Well, if you're like most Americans, you're probably eating crappier food but still watching a lot of TV. A new Reuters/Ipsos poll suggests as much, at least.