Behold, the bike lane to nowhere: Bedford Avenue's hotly contested sexy/sinful bike lane cost New York $11K to install and $15K to eliminate to protect Hasids' eyes from scantily clad females, plus whatever damages the guerrilla repainters inflict. [NBCNewYork.com]

On the up side, we now know Santa's White House flight pattern and the importance of reindeer snacks. Univision's news reporters must be pissed that their network gave a presidential sit-down to a pop star.

Lady Gaga's Bad Romance music video garnered 40 million YouTube views in under a month. So, remakes are expected. First, we saw Carlo's home remake. Then, Rachel Sklar's Bad Shiska. Now, Gaga gets the Sims treatment—and it's brilliant.

On Sunday, we told you that MTV had decided not to air the footage of Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi being punched in the face on tonight's episode of Jersey Shore, and speculated as to its motives. Here's what MTV did show.

The country is getting browner. According to the Census Bureau, whites will be a minority by 2050 if immigration continues. As a minority of sorts, I just want to let you guys know it's going to be OK. [NYT]

Tonight, NBC aired a two-hour SNL primetime special, A Very Gilly Christmas, starring everyone's least favorite Kristen Wiig character. It was mostly a showcase of great Holiday-themed sketches of the past, but Gilly—and others—made some new, unfunny appearances.

Television still accounts for 99% of all video viewing in the U.S. But Pepsi's announcement that it will not advertise in February's Superbowl has pushed the TV doomsday clock a couple minutes closer to midnight.

We were promised an attack, people. And what happens? MTV is too chicken to air it. Oh well, we can still salvage this night by having a blast talking about the trashiest show filmed outside of a landfill.

Todd Glass, one of the only funny people to be on Last Comic Standing, is really angry about lack of tidiness in K-Mart. Try to say Marlboro ten times fast— Todd's right, it's hard.

One of the lessons of the downturn has been that repression is a recession-proof industry. Galas and fashion shows don't throw themselves, you know? Let's meet Lola Karimova, social circuit sensation and daughter of the brutal Uzbek dictaor Islam Karmiov.

Today Nikki Finke put out a press release claiming that her Hollywood gossip site Deadline.com attracts a bigger audience than Variety and The Hollywood Reporter combined. We're dubious but were going to stay quiet. But nothing about Finke's ever simple.

Today's Tyra Banks Show put the spotlight on exemplary parenting, showcasing mothers who never knew they were pregnant, and children who swear with impunity at their parents. Then she gave her own interpretations of pregnancy and bad babies.

• A week after a restaurant opened at the Guggenheim Museum and now Robert, a new eatery at the Museum of Arts & Design, has opened. [GS, NYT]
• Maialino begins breakfast service tomorrow, a first for Danny Meyer. [TONY]
• Aspen on West 22nd has been temporarily closed over tax issues. [Eater]
• A judge has ordered the Chelsea club Duvet to close immediately. [NYP]
• The city's plan to require that restaurants post inspection letter grades—which LA has done for years—is one step closer to becoming law. [NYT]
• Three Russian Tea Room chefs have hit the restaurant with a lawsuit. [NYP]
• Another annual "best of" list, if you're in the mood. [Metromix]
• Snooki from MTV's Jersey Shore now has her own taco. [HL via Eater]

[This look inside a Christmas tree made of lights in Madrid, Spain, is giving us some serious flashbacks, man. Image via Getty]

Martha Stewart prepared for a shocking quantity of egg nog; Lindsay Lohan got into a race thing; and Sara Gilbert reveled in old media. The Twitterati overindulged on tradition.

Here's an Italian performer that looks like a cross between Jerry Lewis and Edward James Olmos doing a big ole extravagant number in complete gibberish. Only it sounds exactly like someone with a southern accent. They mock us!

Tonight we're tuned into Gilly's Christmas Special and Jersey Shore. What are you watching tonight? Let us know in the comments.

Isn't that cute: Al Franken cuts Lieberman off during a speech, then Lieberman's BFF John McCain tags in and comes to his rescue. Anyone who thinks C-Span 2 is the dullest thing since C-Span 1 needs to watch this clip.

We couldn't make it to the premiere of Avatar in L.A. last night, because it's far. Fictional freelancer Betsey Morgenstern cashed in her frequent flier miles and made the trip for us. Here is her report.

Meg Whitman would like to be governor of California, but the former eBay CEO should demonstrate she can govern her own website first: The commenters on MegWhitman.com are in open revolt. It's brutal.