Brooke Astor's scheming son, Anthony Marshall, heads to court today to find out if he'll do hard time for his crimes. Will the 85-year-old get an early Christmas present and get a judge to grant him his request to serve out his sentence at home? Will he spend the next year behind bars? The answer should come any moment now. [NYP, AP] Update: The judge just sentenced him one to three years behind bars, and Marshall will be required to report to prison on January 19.

Yesterday Eliot Spitzer had an excellent op-ed, about AIG, in the New York Times. Hendrik Hertzberg, at the New Yorker, praised it. No-one mentioned his sex scandal. Here's what he did right, and what Tiger Woods is doing wrong.

• It's still unclear what caused Brittany Murphy's death in Los Angeles yesterday morning. While the coroner has indicated the 32-year-old actress appears to have died from "natural causes," it's been reported that lots of prescription drug bottles were uncovered by cops at the scene, and some friends say they'd grown increasingly concerned that she was abusing painkillers. An autopsy is planned for today or tomorrow, but an official cause of death may take a couple of weeks, pending the results of toxicology tests. [NYP, TMZ, People, Sun]
• Murphy's death has put the spotlight on her husband, sketchy 39-year-old screenwriter Simon Monjack, who married Murphy in 2007. [NYDN]
• Tiger Woods set sail on his 155-foot yacht Privacy on Saturday accompanied by a bunch of friends. Where he's going is anybody's guess, although considering the boat has a range of 4,000 miles, it could be anywhere. As for his estranged wife, Elin Nordegren, now that she's retained a divorce lawyer, she's reportedly gearing up to ask for full custody of their two kids and half of his fortune, which has been estimated at $600 million. [NYP, People]

Since Beatrice Inn closed last April it feels like hundreds — thousands — of clubs and lounges have tried to claim succession. Today we have big news on the actual new Beatrice — Paul Sevigny's imminent new place.

Samuel L. Jackson turns 62 today. Kiefer Sutherland is turning 43. DreamWorks co-founder Jeffrey Katzenberg is 59. Ray Romano is turning 52. Andy Dick is celebrating his 44th. Jane Fonda is turning 72. Former talk show host Phil Donahue is 74. French actress Julie Delpy is 40. Jane Kaczmarek of Malcolm in the Middle turns 54. Former Mets pitcher Roger McDowell turns 48. Holly Peterson, the socialite and author of The Manny, is turning 45. And retired tennis champ Chris Evert turns 55 today.

Eight-six virgins descend onto Chris Brown, who we are now supposed to believe is a "gent"; Barbara Walters makes sweet love to Frank Langella; Catherine Zeta-Jones shows her tits. Monday gossip is so juicy, it will run down your chin.

The Associated Press asked editors and news directors to vote for their top news stories of 2009. They asked the same of the general public on Facebook. What do we learn when we compare the results?

Snow looks nice and everything, but some people need to get to work this morning.

Merry Christmas, haters of liberal media: Here is a dazzling charticle depicting TIME's favorite cover girls. Though Nixon has the most covers ever, Obama's on track to beat him, threefold, by the end of his presidency. [Teqnolog]

Her story was a Hollywood dream: the prodigiously talented teenager who worked her way from regional theater to big-screen blockbusters alongside Oscar nominees. But then her star power fizzled, her personal life disintegrated, and she met a grisly end.

"Chicago Politics" is a comedy troupe, right? Blagojevich-tainted incumbent Heather Steans is mighty embarrassed after her husband followed her opponent to a gay bar, then went on a shitfaced rant after a suspicious trip "into the men's room."

Brittany Murphy's last known interview—on December 1 in Los Angeles at the premiere of her flim, Across The Hall—is simultaneously sad and sweet. Sad, because she appears out of it. Sweet, because she was still such a doll.

How much money do you think "Avatar" would have made if it didn't snow a million inches this weekend? $1 billion? $300 trillion? Stupid snow. What does God have against James Cameron besides the fact he's sort of a douche?

Jessica Simpson posted the following video to her Twitter account this evening. In it, hairstylist/BFF Ken Paves tapes Simpson as she attempts ear candling with a pizza box guard—he sings Christmas songs, she grimaces and that's about it.

After a weekend spent frantically preparing for a series of important health care votes, our nation's esteemed Senators are bickering, exhausted and undersexed. And about one bitch slap from breaking down on C-Span and begging to be sent home.

According to a recent poll (sponsored, albeit, by a pro gun-control organization) gun owners are more supportive of tighter gun laws than the NRA. Every gun owner does not want the right to carry a concealed flamethrower. [NYT]

"The Office" star Mindy Kaling's holiday tale in the Times is, like her, very sweet.

The editors of Instyle Weddings must have kicked themselves when Tiger Woods turned out to be a two-timing sex maniac. Just a couple months ago, the magazine named him a 'role model' for grooms-to-be. (Which, he probably still is!)

Research Question: Why are New Yorkers miserable? Hypothesis: Because New York is not a pleasant place to live.

"Flight of the Conchords" star Todd Barry is another king of deadpan. Here he lays down his grievances about freaky words and abbreviations.