Oy. The rollercoaster of a train wreck of a nuclear meltdown that is Teen Mom continues to slowly crush our souls. This week: more fighting, more advice, and a whole lot of regret.

Good to know that the technology contributors over at Good Morning America have such a grasp on web culture. Listen to this "expert" flub up Keyboard Cat's name multiple times during a segment on the best viral videos. Ouch.

"You see African-Americans dealing with Hispanics on obtaining narcotics and weapons. We're seeing Hispanic gang members involved with the Eastern European criminal figures," said Robert W. Clark, acting special agent in charge of the criminal division of the Los Angeles field office of the Federal Bureau of Investigation. "Where they see opportunities to collaborate, they do."

Robert DeNiro, Mel Brooks, Dave Brubeck, Grace Bumbry and Bruce Springsteen were all appreciated during last night's Kennedy Center Honors. Here's a roundup of some of the best moments —including Ben Stiller and the Obamas— courtesy of Aol.

America's most hated political figure, former Vice President Dick Cheney, has inserted himself into the news again. He said something about Obama, and terror. That has been a wonderful 2009 trend, reporting on what Cheney mumbles.

"The Top of the Rock observation deck gives visitors a 360-degree, panoramic view of New York City, and is located in what famous skyscraper?" When 300 randomly selected NYC residents were asked that question, 34 percent said they didn't know. Another 41 percent responded that it's on top of the Empire State Building. [NYT/City Room]

Pictures may only be worth a thousand words, but they can certainly sear an image onto your brain for all eternity. Here are the pictures that defined 2009 on Gawker.

Cops have closed part of Times Square because a raggedy, tarp-obscured white van has been parked there two days, suspiciously. Well. If you had a parking spot in Times Square you wouldn't move, either. [CBS] UPDATE: Prestigious evacuations!

Never in history has anything good come from a "manifesto." Their effects range from misguided repression (political manifestos) to mere annoyance (college student-written manifestos). Oh look, a new "manifesto" is out! "A Slow-Word Movement." First ever good manifesto? No.

The boyfriend of a Weather Channel reporter interrupted her mid-forecast by getting down on one knee and proposing. Awwwww! You may now return to your regularly scheduled weather reports.

Skilled chefs in Hollywood, some of them gay, some of them foreign. High-end, demanding clients, most of them assholes. When the two worlds collide, it sounds like the recipe for success, right? Maybe!

Bernie Madoff is back in his cell after a nearly two-week stay in the prison hospital. He'll be ringing in 2010 in the dark, though: The Butner Federal Correctional Complex turns off the lights at 11pm. [AP]

Because Congress is populated by venal idiots, the estate tax expires on January 1, 2010 only to rise again on January 1, 2011. So rich old people everywhere are deliberately engineering their lives to end during the next calendar year.

Al Roker is so dedicated to his craft that he'll broadcast the weather via satellite during his holiday vacation. In Los Angeles. At five in the morning. Watch this clip and you tell me whether he's had any sleep today.

Everyone's favorite dysfunctional pranking couple returns for another installment: this time water and flour! I predict that within three months these two will either murder each other or land a TV development deal.

We won! Sorta! After we complained about the annoyingness of Whole Foods CEO John Mackey and the media trend of finding it surprising that he is right-wing (he is a CEO), Mackey stepped down as Chairman of Whole Foods.

That unattended (and possibly nefarious) van in Times Square that prompted the NYPD to call in the bomb squad this morning and order the evacuation of thousands of workers in the area? It was nothing. And it's possible the van could have been sitting there for, like, months but no one took notice of it until now: "It wasn't clear how long the van had been there. A similar-looking van in the same location appeared on Google Street View in warmer weather, which suggests it could have been there for a while." [AP]

This bridge in Siberia is wobbly, narrow, long, and really high above the water. How anyone crosses this bridge without completely losing control of their bowels is beyond me. So let's see someone cross it!

Today is the final day of voting for our Hipster of the Decade poll. Carles of Hipster Runoff is currently winning. If you disagree (or agree, whatever) vote below right now, bitches!