Schlubby actors Kevin James and Vince Vaughn schlub it up in a movie. Jim Beluschi will schlub it up in a a TV drama. The UK Doesn't like Alice in Wonderland. Trade Roundup: Safety glasses required beyond this point.

Tonight, the Flying Tomato landed in Stephen Colbert's cozy Vancouver studio, as Shaun White stopped by for a post-gold medal victory lap interview. White discussed the American snowboarding team's outfits with Colbert, but not before poking fun at figure skaters.

I don't know how to explain everything that this post contains in a lede, but I'll try: tonight's Olympic ice dancing was... INSANE. Inside, Linkin Park, Requiem for a Dream, Home Alone, a sexxxy commercial and Schindler's List—seriously.

As a Harvard-educated eye surgeon, Dr. Emil William Chynn has perfected the art of LASIK surgery. And after years of raging against the wealthy owner of a derelict building on his block, he's perfected the angry email screed. Behold.

Tonight, Larry King talked to a bald guy who apparently is the leader of a religion? The Dalai Lama? Anyway, King managed to get him to shut up about world peace for long enough to talk about Tiger Woods.

Like all great comedy, Louis C.K.'s humor reveals stark, yet everyday, truths about the human condition. Here he is on what it's like to turn 40.

Gas up your private jets, rich people: The economy has improved almost to the point that you can start flying around without getting shot down by a Stinger missile of economic populism.

Doctors are evaluating Dick Cheney after the former vice president experienced chest pains and was sent to George Washington University, where doctors reportedly gave him an angiogram to examine his coronary arteries. Cheney is "stable" and "resting comfortably," according to doctors and family members quoted by NBC News, but may need additional treatment tomorrow.

Welcome to your weekday Olympic village. Tonight: Ice dancing has one final chance to offend. Freestyle skiing! Team ski jumping! Crank up your old Jock Jams Vol. III cassette, pull up a beanbag and let's talk about the Olympics.

The chief of AOL's Seed is trying to get his former New York Times colleagues to join his computer-statistics-driven freelancer army. In the email below, Timesmen are urged to defect and "reinvent the field" of journalism, since "jobs are scarce."

Eric Schmidt might advocate for making information "even more open and accessible," but not when it comes to his mistresses. We're told the Google CEO's aggressive lawyers brought down ex-girlfriend Kate Bohner's online recovery diary this weekend.

Because Tiger has been through so much! He needs our sympathy, and this brave, emotional, sissy Golf Channel host is here to give it to him. Tiger's admission that he cheated on his wife repeatedly warrants tears, dammit!

If, like these Canadians, I shelled out two million dollars for one lunch with Warren Buffett, I might ask for the restaurant to be closed. Plus: right by the kitchen? That is the worst table in the house!

There's a new preview reel for the upcoming third season of Real Housewives of New York City and it is just jam-packed with things that make my eyes fall out of my face. Here are the top five things.

What's worth watching live tonight and what should you record on your DVR for later? We've got the answers here. What will you be tuning into tonight? Let us know in the comments.

Michelle Obama might be unveiling various efforts to end childhood obesity, but America's other favorite black woman will not be deterred by her love of sweets. Today on Oprah: a set entirely made of CHOCOLAAATTE!!

Beep boop, whir clank whir, boop borp. That was computers, making noises all day. Some of those noises are made by you, saying various things to/at us. Let's look at our favorite thing that you computer-said at us today.

Birther Queen Orly Taitz has appealed to the UN to protect her from Barack Obama.

The cast of Glee will perform at the White House, Will Arnett and Mitch Hurwitz reunite in a new Fox comedy pilot, Betty White may host SNL after all, and more!

A McG directed, Takashi Murakami commissioned music video for "Turning Japanese", starring Kirsten Dunst in a blue wig. Dunst does Spider-Man 3, McG directs Terminator: Salvation, they both disappear from the public eye... and re-emerge with this? The Murakami Curse!