This morning, the ladies of The View gave their reactions to Kate Gosselin's "statement dance" on Dancing With The Stars, wherein she awkwardly stomped around to Lady Gaga's "Paparazzi." Whoopi's reaction? A scathing stankface.

In last night's episode there was a violent game of Assassin, while other people warred with each other in their own way, and, inevitably, something died.

Yahoo's M&A deal-makers are deciding right now whether or not to buy super-hot location-based startup Foursquare for around $100 million, says a source close to bankers involved in Foursquare's current fundraising efforts.

Calling all New York foodies: if restaurants, chefs and all related goings-on gets you excited, you should be watching AlwaysHungry.com's web series. In this short clip, we become acquainted with legendary NYC butcher and meat purveyor Pat LaFrieda.

Yelp has surrendered. CEO Jeremy Stoppelman announced his local-reviews site will stop selling merchants the ability to select "favorite reviews," which push negative feedback further down profile pages. So now how will Yelp make money?

Vanity Fair editor Graydon Carter is reportedly considering opening a third restaurant in Fedora's former spot on West 4th Street. He better be careful; we hear he recently lost his top assistant, who got tired of booking Waverly Inn reservations.

Tom Coburn's gone rogue! At a town hall, the conservative Oklahoma Senator actually claimed that House Speaker Nancy Pelosi is a "nice lady," and not a monstrous, liberty-defiling Gorgon. Then he suggested seeking information from sources other than Fox News!

Check out this hilarious fake trailer for a movie version of Pac-man. Re-imagined as a Saw-type horror/thriller, Pac-man is scarier and more disgusting than ever.

Upon discovering that insurance companies are finding loopholes to avoid insuring kids, Jon Stewart wonders what kids will have to do to qualify. Plus, the urologist who won't touch your penis if you voted for Obama!

It would appear we've giving people flashbacks: Readers are still sending us their Steve Jobs sightings. According to the latest batch, the Apple CEO detests a certain partner company, hangs with Larry Ellison and refuses special hospital blankets.

At last, the trailer for the upcoming Angelina Jolie thriller Salt is out. Excitement for the movie is mostly based on the fact that it also features Philly fameball Arthur Kade, who didn't think Angelina was all that, btw.

Kids just won't listen? They're not yours anyway—tell those brats to shut up! Instead of a trip to the zoo, why not a beating? It's okay if you can rap along to it—just ask Hitman Sammy Sam.

Today on Regis and Kelly, Regis declared that he was now "part of the internet" and showed off his new iPad, which he is of course competely powerless to use.

As a girl is getting out of her car all the car alarms around her go off. Watch as a group of college students pull the "car alarm" prank on another unsuspecting student.

Just pretend dead, though! Also today: a new, violent-sounding movie starring two non-violent-looking actresses, a great new game show, a movie about legal hookers, and something about the House.

As Weight Watchers battles disparaging remarks about its pseudoscientific experts, the company also faces a more existential threat: women who think they don't need to be on a diet. Whoa, who said that was okay?

After the recent rash of 3D film releases, Stephen Colbert has decided that 3D programming is the way of the future. Here's his seizure-inducing attempt at giving his show some depth.

Sandy is afraid divorce will make Jesse crazy. Naomi Watts and Liev Schreiber aren't breaking up. Dennis Hopper has to shell out fat alimony payments. Michael Jackson's doctor won't cop a plea. Tuesday's gossip is due in family court.

Senator John Ensign may be indicted for "structuring," a fancy term for inventing made-up financial transactions to avoid embarrassing disclosures, like paying your mistress $96,000 to go away, which is what John Ensign did.

Do you know someone you want to kiss? Can't find the right time? Watch this. Pretty soon, you won't just be kissing, you'll be baby-making.