Tonight's episode of Ugly Americans re-imagined a post-demonic apocalypse New Jersey, zombie race-hate and all. With storylines like this, we can see why this show is gaining fans at an exponential rate each week.

The filthiest, fakest rumor of the year—Sandra and Jesse's Hitler poopstache shotgun butt sex video—has been denied by both accused participants. Please take your Hitler poopstache shotgun butt sex fantasies elsewhere, like Michelle Bombshell's strip club, maybe.

Well, that's it. China's eventual world domination has been the subject of speculation for years but today it is official. Coke has given China a delicious new green tea-flavored soft drink. And we don't even get it!

Tonight on The Daily Show, Jon Stewart continued his harsh criticism of the Catholic Church—and, specifically, the Pope—regarding its handling of several pedophiliac sex scandals that have caught the media's attention as of late. The controversial video, inside.

Tonight, Anderson Cooper talked with the Best Political Team on Television about strip clubs. Turns out, he does not really know about them.

Air marshals say they stopped a man trying to "light his shoes on fire" on a United flight from D.C. to Denver. The suspect is Mohammed al Modadi, a Qatari diplomat. Update: He was actually smoking in the bathroom.

If Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann ran together in 2012, would their T-shirts be made of tiny poison-tipped knives? Tonight, Sean Hannity raised the specter of a Palin-Bachmann ticket. Palin liked the idea, and the crowd went wild!

Gary Busey is equal parts cowboy and Indian as he presumably walks down to the liquor store for his morning bath. (via EastandWest) [Bauer Griffin]

Are you a live-blogging master? I'll bet you are! Why not showcase that mastery by joining our live-blog of Top Chef Masters? The new season starts tonight, and we're live-blogging it in the comments section of this post.

You might remember TJ Miller from Cloverfield, he played the cameraman throughout the film. Miller isn't just comfortable on-screen, he's also comfortable on stage, checkout this clip from one of his best stand-up sets.

Fortune Magazine just posted an interview with America's favorite hooker-loving ex-governor, Eliot Spitzer. He wants to stage a comeback. Now the question is: How long before we start getting the mailers?

Since none of my favorite shows are new tonight, I'm going to do some exploring in TV Land. Who is with me?! I'm a sucker for a good oddball documentary, so Is It Possible? on Discovery tonight has my vote.

[The High Line was the place to go for people looking to catch some sun on this 91-degree, record breaking day. Image via Getty]

Justin Bieber (#Justin #Bieber #JustinBieber) has forgiven the president of the United States for mispronouncing his name. The conciliatory statement should stave off a Wild In the Streets sort of situation... for now.

TONIGHT: The latest Real World/Road Rules challenge is upon us, Top Chef Masters is back, Peep Show third season premieres, Rihanna performs on American Idol, Shear Geinus declares a winner, and Steve Carrell returns to The Daily Show.

Today in #tips, 15-year-olds trek to the North Pole for Foursquare cred, your Kraken-cat has been released, a Sharia-safe sex store sets up shop, and Lindsay Lohan has an ironic tattoo but no sense of irony.

Your daily dose of celebrity Twitter musings.

Today we looked at dwindling gay ghettos and flipped the script by telling you straights what to do for once. It sparked many comments! Let's take a look at a few, shall we?

John Hodgman wants you to cover up; Rebecca Dana wants you to imagine a serious Today; and Ludacris wants to know how to thwart your chastity plans. The Twitterati were instructional.

[Ashley Olsen in New York today; image via Bauer-Griffin]