The Way We Live Now: Lying and saying we're anticipating the best. How could it possibly be so? We do that to reassure the kids, you know. Leave em in their poverty schools, learning to counterfeit. It gives them hope.

New York Magazine's media reporter Gabriel Sherman goes inside Sarah Palin's $12 million a year empire in this week's issue. Here's some of the math on Palin's various projects:

Otarian (noun): 1. of the earth. 2. New, low-carbon veggie restaurant, where everything—from the floor, to the tables—is made from recycled materials. Can you rival the greenness? Send us your Tales of Green Living and you could win a recyclable prize! Click through for details.

During an interview about her upcoming album Bionic, a reporter coughed and Christina (who looks good!) interrupted her sentence to voice her displeasure before playing it off as a joke. What an amateur: Naomi Campbell would have clocked the guy.

Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution came to an end this weekend with a decidedly mixed-bag victory for changing West Virginian's eating habits. However, Jamie may want to consider investing some time out of the kitchen in taking driving lessons.

"I love the masculinity of it. It's sort of the bad-ass fur," said one fashionisto. "Tougher than mink," cooed another. The new 'it' fur is nutria, the 20-lb. river rat that headlines the "World's Biggest Rat" sideshow at Coney Island.

Remember how painful backflips can be? Well, front-flips are nothing to scoff at either, watch this gymnast face plant instead of front-flip.

This is one of those videos that makes you laugh uncontrollably, yet you're not quite sure why. Here, Beyoncé sits with Britney Spears, Lady Gaga and Rihanna as they go through their Number Ones—until an uninvited guest interrupts.

In your energetic Monday media column: Richard Beckman has a hardcore plan for The Hollywood Reporter, newspaper circulation declines, The Wrap gets paid big time, and anonymous angry stories from the bowels of the New York Post.

Of all I've learned about the Internet, I know that if I say anything negative about video games, a lot of very passionate individuals are going to threaten my life with authentic replica broadswords.

John McAfee suspected Fast Company would portray him as a con artist. Which is why it's so bizarre the software kingpin proceeded to act like one, publicly blabbing about the people he's misled and the fun he had doing so.

It seems that these Good Day New York Anchors are a little too eager about the advertised "sex tips" for Dr. Oz's next show. Lucky for them, Dr. Oz is here to save the day.

Hollywood Squares isn't the end all be all of Tic-Tac-Toe re-imaginings. Watch as the good people over at The Simpsons prove that all the game needs is giant spaceships and a war-torn alien love story to really make it interesting.

After an Iranian cleric said earthquakes were God's punishment for scantily-clad women, the pro-scantily-clad lobby of womanity declared today Boobquake, a day to flout and disprove the cleric by baring your boobs. And then a 6.9-magnitude earthquake occurred in Taiwan!

Russell Crowe is set to capture America's heart all over again when Robin Hood hits theaters in two weeks. But let us not forget: Russell Crowe is crazy. Some exclusive excerpts from a new book remind us just how crazy.

If you like your workout routines to include pelvic thrusts, air guitar, and the occasional mounting-by-a-groupie, then Bret Michaels and his team have just the class for you!

At least at the box office where the unstoppable fire-breathers roared for another week. They've been trained how to fly, but J.Lo's career is still in an unstoppable tailspin thanks to another movie dud.

Eleven year old Nadia Bloom spent four days lost in a thick, alligator infested Florida swamp before being rescued. This morning she told Robin Roberts about how she survived, and how her friends welcomed her back to school.

Wal-Mart is once again trying to build a store in NYC. Unions, call your goons!

Boys, beware! The homosexual is among you, waiting to lure innocents back to his bungalow to initiate into his secret society of subversive sexuality. The perversion is invisible; anyone may be a hidden homo, as this relic PSA warns.