Today at Gawker.TV, NBC's Thursday night lineup had their finales: Matt Damon is Liz Lemon's soulmate, Jeff Winger wins the heart of three ladies, The Office hawks fake social networking sites, and Parks & Rec's government shuts down. Plus MacGruber!

[At the Cannes Film Festival, Paris Hilton contributes to America's robust cultural exchange with France. Image via Bauer-Griffin. NSFW image—for those with steel stomachs—inside.]

Chris Matthews played a little hardball with Chelsea Handler last night on The Tonight Show when he made a jab at Chelsea's comprehension skills. Need a little ice for that burn?

Enjoy these while you can because NBC has made the terrible decision to start Parks and Rec in a midseason spot next fall. Though the episode was pretty fantastic all-around, we've picked favorite moments for you to laugh at.

Following his anti-civil rights and pro-BP gaffes, people are now turning to Kentucky Republican senate candidate Rand Paul's historical nuttiness. Here, via TPM, he talks about a giant conspiracy to found the 'Amero' — the American version of the Euro.

Apparently iconic eighties musician Adam Ant has been sectioned under Britain's Mental Health Act, kind of like the time the hospital put a mental health hold on Britney Spears. The news comes after Adam Ant's curse-strewn stage rant against Christians.

But not in a dirty way! We find out in this clip that maybe that list of potential candidates wasn't complete. Also, Jacob knows how to bring the party.

Alabama preacher Anthony Hopkins murdered his wife in 2004, then stored her body in a basement freezer until police arrested him in 2008. He was sentenced today to life in prison plus 51 years. [AL.com]

Marc Jacobs' naked perfume ad is just another reason to love him.

When attempting a jump/stunt off of a slide, always check to see if the slide is dangerously wet. The more you know.

Fox News (who are admittedly pushing this angle) report that Utah, Rhode Island, Texas and Georgia are taking steps towards show-us-your-papers laws like Arizona's. They make no mention of an upcoming election, and the cynical political appeal of being 'tough'.

Leave it to Martha Stewart to sneak in a snobby dig in even the most pleasant of segments. In this video, Stewart bluntly vocalizes her dislike of the R&B star's haircut.

On last night's Office we were told how to "Woof" for only 12.99 a month, and were almost told how to "Suck it" which could also be a forward thinking social networking concept, or just a really awesome yellow hoodie.

Liza Minnelli singing "Single Ladies" in Sex and the City 2 is perhaps the gayest thing ever. The only problem: it's bad. Really bad. We can't possibly blame Liza, so who's fault is it? Someone must pay! [The Awl]

It's not just humans who are crazy for LOST, apparently cats are wild for it too. This bunch got together to run down the entire series in one minute, with the singular wit that cats can bring to this discussion.

As Memorial Day approaches there are going to be plenty of days when your boss will be jetsetting someplace fabulous while you're stuck in your cubicle. Feel free to celebrate, but here are some rules to make it go smoothly.

While we were waiting to see an end to the "will they or won't they?" between Jeff and Britta, the writers threw Jeff's ex into the mix and ended with a shockingly unexpected kiss to close the show.

There is a funny Internet video of Justin Bieber running into a glass door in Frankfurt. The AP wrote an entire article about it. There's not much else to say about this. Click through for the article and the video.

Cheating Sandra Bullock husband and lover of strippers Jesse James is breaking his silence, tearfully. "They call you the most hated man in America," says the interview. "I think it's most hated man in the world," he replies. Watch video.

In your finally Friday media column: Brian Tierney goes 3-D, an attorney general bravely takes on Twitter, Sarah Ellison and Michael Wolff work the same territory, and Rafat Ali is ready to do...something else.