There have been several mysteries in the recent life of Georgia Tech aerospace engineering student James Hubert. The first was: Where is James Hubert? The second was: What happened to James Hubert?

Even in ideal conditions, it is not easy making a living as a freelance writer. It is much harder when the places you write for don’t pay you promptly. That’s where we come in.

The South Carolina sheriff’s deputy who violently arrested a high school student on Monday will be fired, according to NBC News.

Dennis Hastert, former Speaker of the House, pleaded guilty Wednesday morning to lying to the FBI in an investigation of $3.5 million in hush money he allegedly paid to cover up unspecified past misconduct—widely reported to be the sexual abuse of one his male students when he worked as a high school teacher.

Donald Trump knows beautiful women, no one can deny—but did you know he’s also a fount of beauty advice?

Otha Anders, 73, of Ruston, Louisiana, recently cashed in 45 years worth of collected pennies, netting himself $5,136.14—meager payment for a lifetime spent being driven slowly insane by the pursuit of pennies.

With the 2016 Olympics fast approaching in Brazil, a huge stink been made about Rio’s sewage-infested waters, which authorities now admit won’t be cleaned up in time for the games. “Wouldn’t that be nice,” say residents of the Brazilian port of Barcarena, whose beaches are currently covered with thousands of dead, rotting cow carcasses.

Recordings of Jared Fogle bragging about his attraction to children and the lengths to which he would go to satisfy it will air on the “Dr. Phil” show on Thursday and Friday, the New York Post reports.

The Washington Post’s David Weigel has an account of a CNN happy hour event featuring Lindsey Graham, and the whole thing is oddly delightful, if only for reminding us of a time, in the sepia-toned long-ago, when Lindsey Graham still existed.

An art installation of empty champagne bottles, spent confetti and torn party signage at the Museion Bozen-Bolzano in Italy was mistaken for actual garbage by cleaning staff over the weekend, who swept it up and put it in the garbage, Reuters reports.

A United passenger with cerebral palsy was forced to crawl from his airplane to the gate when the airline’s staff took away a special wheelchair needed for just such a case, reports the Los Angeles Times.

Ben Carson has made it a goal of his campaign to “get us to mature as a society,” reports the Associated Press, and so he is resolved to continue comparing things he thinks are bad to the worst atrocities in Western history. As mature, nuanced thinkers do.

During tonight’s broadcast of Game 1 of the World Series, Fox suddenly lost their feed and cut to three very confused anchors.

The Islamic State tied three of its captives to Roman-era columns in Palmyra, Syria and killed them by blowing up the structures with explosives, activists in the ancient city, captured by the Islamic State in May, told the Associated Press.

A Los Angeles Police Department officer is suing the city alleging he was retaliated against for reporting that he was racially profiled while off-duty, reports the Los Angeles Times.

Hasbro Inc. requested in a court filing Monday that a federal judge dismiss the $5 million lawsuit filed by Fox News anchor Harris Faulkner against the toy manufacturer in August, the Associated Press reports. Faulkner alleges that Hasbro appropriated her name and likeness for one of its toy hamster products.

A witch—a real witch! from Salem and everything!—is asking the courts to do what a bubbling cauldron full of nightshade and eye of newt apparently cannot: keep a dastardly warlock from allegedly harassing her, reports the Associated Press.

An internal investigation into the arrest of a high school student by one of his officers will be finished within 24 hours, Sheriff Leon Lott said at a press conference on Tuesday. “Even though she was wrong for disturbing the class,” Lott said, “I’m looking at what our deputy did.”

Don Lemon, who could always fall back on teaching yoga if that whole news thing doesn’t work out, because his ability to put his whole foot in his mouth is incredible, pulled another sick eka pada sirsasana Tuesday while covering a school cop’s forceful arrest of a black student in South Carolina.