Country-singing colon-irrigationist Gwyneth Paltrow offered the following epicurean observation on her recent visit to a British talk show:

A shooting spree in Grand Rapids, Michigan, has left seven dead, including one child. The suspect, 34-year-old Rodrick Dantzler (pictured), is currently holed up in an apartment with at least one hostage.

MySpace is so dead it's already circled back for a hipster revival. A 2005 themed party in Gowanus stars the zombified social network and seeks "your most embarrassing... myspacey photo ever." Check out the Evite and start loading your iPod.

Today we heard that a racial slur lawsuit against American Apparel had finally been settled. Seems someone was repeatedly called "the N-word," which is not good. What is good is that the comment inspired this, uh, inspired comment from a reader.

Harry Potter and The End of the Gravy Train, Part Nine premiered in London today along with most of the British cast, a handful of celebs, and JK Rowling herself. Let's have a look at the festivities, shall we?

Biologist, philosopher, and atheist prophet Richard Dawkins really put his foot in it. The New Statesman says Dawkin's career as a public intellectual is kaput. The Atlantic Wire has him losing a flame-war against his very own fan base. In the blogosphere, the most devoted Dawkinsians—people who've spent their adult lives in adoration of his every utterance—are boycotting his books and calling him a buffoon. A classist, male chauvinistic, and potentially racist buffoon. And why?

A new comedy star is emerging and her name is Melissa McCarthy. Also today: the glorious return of Little People, Big World, catching up with the Ribisis, and an exciting new gay movie.

"My mom is going to kill me." A phrase used so often it has lost its urgency and true meaning. But the Casey Anthony trial commanded our attention because it tapped into this dark side of motherhood. [Jezebel]

Why is the White House tearing down a 50-foot-tall elm tree from the White House grounds today? Some might say it's because of a recent thunderstorm that twisted and bent the tree into a life-threatening position for passersby. A likely excuse.

Months before he was accused of leaking thousands of classified documents to Wikileaks, Bradley Manning had a series of instant message conversations with transgendered videoblogger Zinnia Jones. In newly-published logs of their conversation, Bradley Manning talks about his past struggles in the army, current relationship troubles and high hopes for the future.

You may not have noticed, but former New Mexico Gary Johnson is still running for the Republican presidential nomination! Oh, you didn't know in the first place? He's like this libertarian type guy who doesn't get invited to Republican debates anymore, and is now desperately relying on poker players to carry him to the nomination.

I don't want this to be the summer of sex scandals like Anthony Weiner and DSK. No, I want this to be the summer of the strange squalor of abandoned amusement parks. Here's footage from a doozy in Wichita, Kansas.

Not too long ago, Neal Boulton was knows as the relentlessly self-promoting pansexual former editor of magazines like Men's Fitness and Genre. He was a big Gawker character for a while, but eventually he went to rehab for heroin addiction, and we agreed to stop mocking him.

Women: why don't they go out and get a job? In a time when our nation's rents are rising, it might be kind of nice—I'm just saying—it might be kind of nice if someone in this apartment with a vagina started bringing in some income. I'm just saying.

You know those Palo Alto woods where Mark Zuckerberg takes prospective Facebook hires for sweet talking? Our colleagues at Gizmodo took pictures of the view and surrounding woodlands. They're almost as breathtaking as Zuckerberg's enormous, throbbing valuation.

No matter what site you use, online dating can be absolutely horrible. Sure, some people find their match on Match.com but more often than not, the people you meet are crazy, critical jerks who have you running for the door within minutes. Let's look at one horrible email from an online relationship gone sour.

ABC's canceled soap operas All My Children and One Life to Live have been snatched from certain death by Prospect Park, a production company that will move the long-running serial dramas onto the internet. Thank God, Susan Lucci will still have a job!

Multiple senior House Democratic aides tell TPM that caucus members were caught off guard by news stories about President Obama's push for deeper deficit and spending reductions — and particularly about the White House's willingness to cut Social Security as part of a grand bargain to raise the debt limit.

It's been seen tens of billions of times on countless websites and Facebook. Thanks to credit card fraud, it's generated more revenue than most tech startups. Meet the "1 Tip for a Tiny Belly" con, if you haven't already.

A new public health report places Mississippi yet again at the top of the lard heap, with a 34% adult obesity rate. That's a lotta fat people! The lowest obesity rate in the country? Colorado's 19%.