Romance-defiling reality hag Patti Stanger has been shilling hard for Sensa — "the weight-loss system" you "sprinkle on your food" (active ingredient: 100% horseshit) — on commercials that run during her Bravo reality show, Millionaire Matchmaker. Well, a reader who gave Sensa a shot wrote in to share her experiences with the miracle product, and we thought we would in turn share them with you.

Fred Durst (Wikipedia entry "career" section: 181 words; "controversy" section: 1370 words) will produce and star in a sitcom for CBS about a "rock legend" raising a family. Working title: Douchebag. (Seriously.) Ashton. Durst. Who's next? Joe Francis? [Deadline]

The internet is a funny place, in that one moment, it's restoring your faith in the world — say, with the story of a one-legged cat who returns a $10 million lottery ticket to his favorite waitress — and the next, it's showing you something so cruel and awful, you want to climb into a kayak and not stop paddling until you reach Pluto. This video, first posted on Tuesday afternoon by World Star Hip Hop and which has since gone viral, is a perfect example of the latter.

We're down to the final five designers. Which will be bound for the big finale? Join us as we live-blog the episode together and find out!

Today we discovered that religious people have senses of humor, despite every single bit of evidence to the contrary. Good for them! This revelation led to all of you making lots of religion jokes and here's our favorite.

Here's a one-year-old child whose parents taught her to use an iPad. Now when she's given a magazine, she tries to move her finger over the pages, clueless that it doesn't work the same way.

TV's busiest writer/producer/director is far too busy. Also today: Two big-time actresses are wallowing into the television swamp, and there's some good news for Revenge fans.

Magnetic senses! Big dinosaurs! Old paint! Inca takeovers! Black Death! Silk age! Restless volcano! Polar maps! And a wondrous universe of abundant carbon atoms! It's your Thursday Science Watch, where we watch science—with gravitas!

Time's Michael Scherer digs up this photo from the Romney media archives showing our man Mittens and his old Bain Capital buddies playing with money.

Christopher Chaney, the 35-year-old Florida man accused of hacking into the e-mail and phones of 50 celebrities, says he was "addicted" to spying on celebrities. Poor guy.

Steve Jobs had a mild form of cancer that is not usually fatal, but seems to have ushered along his own death by delaying conventional treatment in favor of alternative remedies, a Harvard Medical School researcher and faculty member says. Jobs's intractability, so often his greatest asset, may have been his undoing.

Reality television has folded in on itself so many times, parody versions are barely distinguishable from the real thing. Case in point: The contestants of Survivor with their hands tied behind their backs, tearing at pig carcasses with their mouths. With their gaping maws full of animal flesh, they race to a pair of bins to spit the meat out. They are judged by the amount of meat they hoarded.

Most of you know that the Chinese sure do talk funny. But just in case you don't, let's let powerful House Appropriations chair Rep. Hal Rogers explain it.

Since it stopped playing music, MTV was supposed to be the youth culture network, always airing zeitgeisty shows that capture what's next. Then why are they bringing back all their hits from the '90s?

In your gloomy Thursday media column: Eritrea is the pits (of journalism), Erin Burnett is unpopular, the WSJ Europe circulation scandal continues, The Guardian U.S. is optimistic, and Michael Miner is an OG (of journalism).

You know that I love a time-lapse video, so how could I resist one of the ludicrous rich people's druggie playground that is Burning Man? Sure, this thing is more played out than rolling around on E in the desert, but there's something great about watching a bustling city come together over the course of a few days and then putter out.

ABC News president Ben Sherwood is a notorious social climber and horrible self-help writer whose detractors call him "the Draco Malfoy of broadcast news." When he took over the news division last year, some at the network worried that he was more of a "Hollywood Guy" than a "News Guy." How Hollywood? Last month he told his staff in a morning conference call to stop reporting news of a potential terror plot timed to the 9/11 anniversary in such a "measured way" and to "turn this into a thriller."

Occupy Wall Street's camp out in Zuccotti Park could come to a messy end Friday morning. The city has given protesters a 7 a.m. deadline to clear the park for a "cleaning" that would effectively end the occupation. But occupiers promise to resist.

Okay, sorry, this post probably should have been tagged "NSFW" due to the large image of an old man's melting face. But let's move beyond courtesies: Was Ron Paul's eyebrow collapsing during Tuesday's debate? This image appears to show a fake eyebrow just stone cold fallin' off.

Here's a redband (aka NSFW) trailer for American Reunion, the fourth feature film in the simply hilarious American Pie franchise. It's totally wild!