Every day, celebrities across the world are followed and photographed by the omnipresent paparazzi, often to entertaining results. Here are some of our favorite shots from the past week.

It's the Golden Rule of Pop Divadom: Thou shalt throw shade upon your contemporaries (so long as they aren't in the room). So consider this sprawling supercut by Rich Juzwiak the Holy Bible of Diva Cuntitude. Each clip contains a Whitney, a Mariah, a Madonna, etc., talking smack behind another one's back, followed by a clip of the gossiped-about diva talking about another diva, and so and and so forth, until it all devolves into a cannibalistic diva free-for-all, where all that's left is a pile of bones and pearly teeth and silicone inserts and Dior shoes and Versace gowns. It's very entertaining! [FourFour]

A decade-old recording has surfaced offering damning evidence against Syracuse University first assistant mens basketball coach Bernie Fine, who stands accused of molesting three men years ago when they were children. The school has responded to the bombshell by firing him:

Bob Simon profiled Angelina Jolie on tonight's 60 Minutes. In addition to stating that she once dreamed of being a funeral director, Jolie also shared that—given her past transgressions—she's surprised to still be alive: "People can imagine that I did the most dangerous, and I did the worst, and for many reasons, I shouldn't be here."

What should have been just another sleepy Canadian Football League alumni luncheon in Vancouver on Friday turned unexpectedly violent, when Joe Kapp, 73, former quarterback for the B.C. Lions, got into a fight with his longtime rival, 74-year-old Angelo Mosca, former defensive tackle for the Hamilton Tiger-Cats.

This video shows members of the Pima County Sheriff's Department SWAT Team executing a search warrant at the Tucson, Arizona home of Jose Guerena Ortiz: an Iraq War veteran and young father whom they'd suspected belonged to a family-run drug trafficking ring. It captures perfectly how the drug war has been a tremendous failure.

According to the Daily Mail, "Britain's most feckless father" is a 34-year-old unemployed man who has already produced 15 babies to 13 different ladies, and has two more babies on the way. His name: Jamie Cumming. Commence Beavis and Butthead-style chuckling.

As Governor of Texas, Republican presidential candidate Rick Perry enacted a policy of providing in-state tuition for the children of illegal immigrants, thereby not completely alienating the country's fastest-growing populations. For this, he was roundly punished by the Republican electorate. But he has a secret weapon: America's favorite fascist Joe Arpaio!

In America, land of the pizza-vegetable and the 24-hour chicken meal, kids who get "too obese" can now be taken from their homes and placed with foster families who receive personal training assistance not made available to their own parents. This is happening right now!

Black Friday shoppers at a West Virginia Target did not allow collapsed-and-dying man Walter Vance to disturb their holiday shopping experience. They simply walked around or stepped over him, before somebody else swept up all those cheap towels and soap dishes.

As we all know, Frosty the Snowman was a jolly happy soul. But was he too jolly? Police in Chesterton, Md. believe so, and yesterday arrested Frosty at the annual Christmas parade for disorderly conduct.

By tweaking the H5N1 bird flu virus a bit, a Netherlands-based virologist and his crew have created a highly contagious version that, if ever unleashed upon the general population, could kill millions of us. But don't fret! Their research, like that one Rolling Stones documentary, hasn't been released to the public. At least not yet, anyway.

The Arab League is hitting Syria with even harsher sanctions, including a ban on travel for Syrian officials and politicians and "a halt to all dealings with the Syrian central bank," because nothing else has worked at stopping the violence.

Miley Cyrus is smoking more than just salvia. Prince William saves two lives. Brad and Jennifer narrowly miss an awkward run-in. Sunday gossip is going to go hang out in the cemetery.

Paying for a first class ticket earns you a lot of privileges that you won't get in coach. Free booze! Comfortable seats! Plenty of room! But there are still some rules that apply in both sections. Like, for example, the prohibition on checking out child porn on your laptop.

The old trolls at the Manchester Union Leader—New Hampshire's largest paper—have endorsed Newt Gingrich in the state's upcoming Republican primary. But the pundits on Twitter still had questions! Questions like, who is the union leader who is endorsing Newt?

Maybe you were visiting with family all week and couldn't check your favorite Gawker Media sites. Or maybe they're all still around and you could use a distraction. Whatever the case, we've got you covered. Here are some of the best videos we watched during the week that was.

If you're looking for bad news on this Black Friday, you're probably Googling "Walmart." The massive discount retailer has been the scene of injuries, arrests, pepper-spraying and general pandemonium at locations across the country today.

For its December 5 issue, Time Magazine is running a cover story in the U.S. titled "Why Anxiety Is Good for You." They thought you should know that your frazzled, overworked or underemployed, recession-tempered emotional state will eventually produce personal benefits. You just have to be patient.

Yesterday's zeitgeist-iest Black Friday shopper—the California Walmart-woman who allegedly pepper-sprayed a crowd of fellow Xbox seekers, creating the scene captured in this video—surrendered to the authorities Friday night, but was released without charge. Before she left the police station, officers asked her for pepper-spraying protips.