Depending on what you're into, porn should be relatively painless. For one unnamed 24-year-old, however, watching X-rated material is associated with serious discomfort. His porn seshes are accompanied by "severe, exploding" headaches that reach their climax about 10 minutes in.

Could this be the revenge of spurned Cedric the houseboy?

Perhaps it was frustration at not being in a theater screening Magic Mike — or horror at how strongly we react when our toys are taken away — but the internet did not handle it well when Netflix, Instagram, and Pinterest all went down last night.

On tonight's Real Time, Bill Maher closed by picking the perfect running mate for Mitt Romney: Maher himself. So what if they disagree on every major issue? Mitt has disagreed with himself just as much.

Something Awful goons David Thorpe and Jon Hendren have come up with what is quite possibly their most uproarious troll to date: With the help of fellow Internet funmakers, the shenaniganeers have devised a foolproof plan to send hip hop artist-cum-shilling machine Pitbull to a Walmart on "the frozen Alaskan island of Kodiak."

Justin Bieber is very sensitive about two things: sexy mom jokes, and Justin Timberlake comparisons. On a phone interview with Mojo of Mojo in the Morning, a Detroit radio show, Bieber threw a small tantrum when Mojo told him he thought he was listening to Justin Timberlake the first time he heard "Boyfriend."

Tough week: Girls ended, the heat wave raged on, and the articles on this site continue to be penned by racists with no lives. Below is the best of the mail we received this week, so thanks for all the tips and information (especially about your sex lives), everyone.

The four Athena Middle School students from who verbally abused elderly bus monitor Karen Klein have been suspended from school and its bus transportation system for one full year, Greece Central School District Superintendent Barbara Deane-Williams announced today.

Wondering how Jenny McCarthy's just-shy-of-40-year-old body has held up since she was named Playboy's Playmate of the Year nearly 20 years ago?

Independence Day is almost upon us, and what better way to show America you love her than by learning how to properly grill a hot dog.

Lori Teel of Portales, New Mexico, says she was handcuffed in front of her five young children and made to spend the night in jail because she neglected to pay $36 in library fines for an overdue Twilight book and a Twilight DVD.

Almost no one was able to predict that Chief Justice John Roberts would join the Supreme Court's liberal bloc in voting to uphold the Affordable Care Act's individual mandate — which means a lot of the coverage, especially from the right wing, has focused on what caused Roberts to vote the way he did. Because, sure, it could be that he genuinely believed in the law's constitutionality, but isn't it more likely that he did it to please his masters at the Washington Post?

Earlier this year, we sent letters to all U.S. death row inmates with execution dates in the near future. Today, we hear from Harry Mitts, who was convicted of murdering two men, including a police sergeant, in 1994. Mitts is scheduled to be executed September 25, 2013.

The public relations industry is not a spelling bee. The spelling bee nerds went into nerd fields like library science or professional blogging, not the high-powered world of Hollywood PR. This is PR Dummies. (Dommies? Dymmies? Ugh, spellcheck.)

Like the Kashif track I posted earlier this month, Krystol's "Nobody's Gonna Get This Loving But You" has been recently remastered (along with the rest of the Gettin' Ready album) by Funkytown Grooves. That label really knows how to please me with glistening electronic funk.

Lauryn Hill pleaded guilty today to tax evasion on over $1.5 million she earned between 2005 to 2007.

Adele has announced via her personal blog that she is with child. The father is boyfriend Simon Konecki, also British, also a singer, also often swathed in layers upon layers of fabrics while out strolling the streets of London.

Once a stripper, always a stripper?

People magazine reports that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are ending their five-year marriage.

Shortly after a Maricopa County Superior Court jury found Michael Marin guilty of burning down his own Biltmore Estates mansion, the former Wall Street trader was caught on camera appearing to swallow an unknown substance. Within minutes, the 53-year-old began to convulse, and ultimately collapsed.