Karl Rove's post-election column fails to mention his own inaccurate election prediction. Karl Rove is a cowardly clown.

Election night was a pretty hectic night for me, so I imagine it was at least doubly so for President Obama.

Does what it says on the tin: White People Mourning Romney.

Comedian Roseanne Barr came in 5th in the presidential race Tuesday. She tweeted Obama congrats, though. Flip-flopper.

The moments after Fox News called Ohio — and thereafter the race — for President Obama will no doubt live in infamy.

For a few brief, terrible moments, Mitt Romney was President-Elect.

This week in butthurtery: Longtime friend of Gawker Eric Dondero of the Libertarian Republic thinks that, in the wake of another victory for President Obama, it's "time to tell any Democrats you know to fuck off and die."

R.I.P. Frances Hashimoto, who was born in a WWII internment camp and still gave us the world's greatest dessert: mochi.

Because America is finally allowed to have nice things again, this is happening:

Noted bloggist B-Skillet over at the Christian Men's Defense Network has taken a few moments away from guarding the perimeter of the last flagging Christian outpost from the Yuuzhan Vong invasion to explain exactly how Mitt Romney (apparently some kind of erstwhile candidate for political office) could have lost. B-Skillet blames "the Slut Vote" (Skillet has since put his WordPress on private; you can see Google's cache here):

Today on Craigslist, a generous man makes an offer to friendly women with shitty jobs:

There is a particular type of white person who startles easily, like a sensitive, inbred racehorse or a motherless baby bird. As you might imagine, this has not been an easy week for them. What do they fear? Everything, mostly. Religions that are very similar but not identical to their own. Loud voices and bold fonts. Multi-book series that are not trilogies. More specifically, they fear what will happen to this most American of the Americas during another four years of an Obama presidency.

As Diane Sawyer would say, "People around the world diiiiiiiiiiie—literally, die" for the right to vote. How do some Americans choose to wield this power so many have sacrificed their lives to obtain? By voting for Santa Claus. Or Mickey Mouse. Or a Korean-pop dance style that mimics a constipated jockey riding a horse.

Obama was re-elected and Nebraskan "news junkie" Shelly Dankert, a self-described "conservative pro-Palin YouTuber," is pissed.

Nakoula Basseley Nakoula was just sentenced to one year in prison for violating his probation.

Pretty much the only thing Miley Cyrus knows for sure about her vaguely impending wedding to World's Best Wikipedia Photo Liam Hemsworth is that she wants another one and then another one. She's going to have three weddings.

Sometimes after a long day rubbing self-tanner on John Boehner, House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi needs a break. And if stretching her feet out and having a glass of pinot gris at her swanky pad in Napa Valley is what does the trick, then that's her prerogative.

"It makes me wonder who my fellow citizens are. I've got to be honest, I feel like I've lost touch with what the identity of America is right now. I really do." —Boston Republican voter Marianne Doherty, on her feelings following Obama's reelection.

A bracing Thought Catalog essay explores the trials and tribulations of dating an older woman. Four years older.

TMZ is reporting that one of the teenage stars of Modern Family, Ariel Winter, was removed from her home by court order last month, amid allegations of parental abuse by her mother.