Talk about Wal-Mart horror stories: Police in Delaware arrested a New Castle man after he allegedly threw a "glob" of his own semen on the backside of a female Walmart shopper because he thought she was attractive.

The Central Texas woman who was unconstitutionally interrupted by a lawmaker while delivering testimony at Monday's State Senate hearing on the newly revived abortion bill, and then dragged away from the podium by four DPS Troopers, finally got to finish talking.

Welcome to Thatz Not Okay, a regular column in which I school inquiring readers on what is and is not okay. Please send your questions to caity.weaver@gawker.com with the subject "Thatz Not Okay."

It's time for Sun Valley, Allen & Co.'s annual Idaho gathering of the ultramonied ruling class. Unlike Davos or Bohemian Grove, this one is something of a family affair. Mark Zuckerberg and his wife Priscilla Chan are there. So are all manner of other mogul and spouse pairs.

A Democratic congressman from California who spent 23 years teaching British literature decided to go old school on Republican lawmakers who oppose the comprehensive immigration reform bill — by grading a letter they wrote to House Speaker John Boehner expressing their position on the matter.

The good news is that Americans are living longer. The bad news is that our extended time on this patch of earth is increasingly marked by the ceaseless, ever-building procession of misery. At least we have cable.

The rangy, lilting whine of Radiohead sounds awful bouncing off the corrugated metal ranges in Chipotles everywhere. This is a tried and true failure, according to Chipotle's playlist guru Christopher Golub, profiled in Denver's Westword.

It's just a normal day at the movies for Britney Spears and her sons, Sean and Jayden, in the video for her Smurfs 2 single, "Ooh La La." They have popcorn, they have soda, they have hair gel. Britney stage whispers to her sons while a small girl eavesdrops behind them, because you know that movie is boring as shit.

Despite writing a column for Slate called "Why I Am Voting for Barack Obama," Eliot Spitzer never actually cast a ballot in the last election. A new twist on classic Slate contrarianism from the man who would be comptroller.

King of Queens star and former co-host of The Talk Leah Remini has left the Church of Scientology after some 30 years over a falling out with Church leader David Miscavige.

Earlier this week, we published a new installment of our occasional series of true stories from Wal-Mart workers. The company was so displeased with its employees speaking publicly that they posted a plea on an internal website asking other employees to send us positive stories. We've gotten quite a few stories. But most aren't positive at all.

The Wall Street Journal's social media editor reported today that Joan Didion was quitting Twitter. The only problem is that Joan Didion was never on Twitter, obviously.

Kings of Leon rocked the LG Arena in Birmingham, England, on Tuesday night, but few in the crowd seemed to notice: They were too busy going nuts for the crowd surfer who stripped naked during "Sex on Fire" and proceeded to flash his "fuzzy furry balls."

The jury in the second-degree murder trial of George Zimmerman for the killing of Trayvon Martin will also be allowed to consider manslaughter charges, judge Debra Nelson ruled today. The judge has yet to rule on the prosecution's request that the jury also consider charges of third-degree felony murder—on the grounds that Zimmerman's violent confrontation with an unarmed teenager was an act of child abuse. UPDATE: The third-degree felony murder charges have now been ruled out.

Sam Mendes, director of the 2012's James Bond installment Skyfall, has just signed on to direct James Bond 24, set for release in the fall of 2015. Daniel Craig will continue to play Bond, John Logan is writing the script.

"Say it to my FACE!" That is Shaggy 2 Dope's rebuttal to GQ's Rob Tannenbaum selecting his horrorcore group, Insane Clown Posse, as the Worst Rappers of All Time.

The crowd of reporters outside the Lipstick Building yesterday evening crammed close enough to Eliot Spitzer to spot a patch of salt-and-pepper stubble that the disgraced former governor had missed on the underside of his otherwise clean-shaven chin. Spitzer—who stammered a bit when a passerby yelled “ELIOT, YOUR DATE IS HERE!”—was on his way into a “petitioning party” at building’s ground floor restaurant.

"Scabby," the giant inflatable rat that the Teamsters union sets up to protest nonunion workplaces, was stabbed by a scab in Chicago last weekend. The Rat Stab Scab was arrested. The judge on the case is named "Adam Bourgeois."

The Internet's favorite trick-shot toddler Titus has been making the talk show rounds since his first video went viral earlier this year, demonstrating his incredible basketball skills without incident.

Over a 32-year career with the Defense Intelligence Agency, Roy Apseloff worked as the organization's Deputy CIO, Vice Deputy Director for Information Management, and director of its National Media Exploitation Center. None of that, apparently, adequately prepared him for his personal—and very sexy—email getting hacked.