Associated Press: "NIN closed the night with a slow and smoky cover of Johnny Cash's 'Hurt,' which earned nonstop cheers from the crowd."

This year, at the request of students, Florida Gulf Coast University booked Kendrick Lamar and Ludacris as the headliners at its annual "Eaglepalooza" concert. Well— the local sheriff is outraged that FGCU's president— a black man!— would stand for this filth.

"You may already be a winner!" exclaimed those ubiquitous, incessant solicitations, but you never won a cent.

Weight loss newsletter the New York Post has taken notice of maybe-gay Newark mayor and U.S. Senate contender Cory Booker's recent weight gain gross pudginess, as evidenced by a recently snapped photo of Booker, sans heavy jacket, walking leisurely along a boardwalk near the beach (like a big ol’ fatty):

James Franco is repeatedly telling the world that he's straight, but that didn't stop the likes of Seth Rogen, Sarah Silverman, Natasha Leggero, Andy Samberg, and Jeff Ross from running the speculation about his sexuality into the ground during last night's Roast of James Franco on Comedy Central. All of the gay jokes are collected above.

Cotton-topped moron Richard Cohen is, of course, an awful newspaper columnist. We're used to his steady stream of ill-concealed bigotry, horny romance diatribes, and routine contempt for the entire idea of "journalism." But now, Richard Cohen is forging bold new frontiers of fucked up sexual obsession.

Police in Tennessee say a woman severely injured herself last week while attempting to extract a wad of cash she had stolen from her boyfriend and hidden inside her rectum.

Sitting pretty on two pairs against an opponent with a single pair and a prayer, World Series of Poker participant Carter Gill went all in with just the river card left to reveal.

A hearty congratulations to ABC News "special correspondent" Katie Couric, who was engaged to boyfriend John Molner, a Chicago financier, over the weekend. Want a preview of the wedding party? Here you are:

It's a story as old as time: Boy meets girl; girl becomes Facebook friends with boy; boy and girl hook up after finding each other through Bang With Friends; boy likes some other girl's Instagram photo; girl unfriends boy; boy vines his break up with girl and uploads it to Reddit.

Intrepid Mississippians tracked down the state's largest alligator, and killed it.

The Worm has returned: Just a few months after his infamous trip to the starving authoritarian hellhole, former basketball superstar Dennis Rodman flew back to North Korea from Beijing on Tuesday, ready to "have a good time," and "sit with [North Korean dictator Kim John Un] and his family."

This is love. An Ohio man remembered he might have a copy of the first Spider-Man comic ever in a box in his attic, found it, and sold it to help pay for his daughter's wedding.

Pictures from our terrifying, barren future Burning Man.

The final day of the Electric Zoo was canceled yesterday after two deaths and multiple hospitalizations from bad Molly. But all Molly is bad Molly if you take six hits of it.

Labor Day, an opportunity for the working class to momentarily kick off those economic shackles and spend the day with their family, barbecuing and enjoying the privileges normally reserved for the leisure class. Or, at least, it used to be.

Casting roundup: Charlie Hunnam (Pacific Rim, Sons of Anarchy) will star opposite Dakota Johnson (21 Jump Street) in the film adaptation of "Fifty Shades of Grey." Also, Benedict Cumberbatch will most likely have a role in the new Star Wars.

I have no idea the provenance for this video, but it appears it took place a few decades ago, somewhere in Australia. Either way, it is by far the classiest arrest one will ever see.

A one-year-old was shot in the head and killed Sunday night after a gunman allegedly attempted to shoot the toddler's father.

Great week for Lance Bass! After spending a decade trying to escape Earth's orbit, the former 'NSYNC member reunited with his old group at the VMA's and then got engaged to boyfriend Michael Turchin.