Benny Johnson at BuzzFeed reports that Newark Mayor and U.S. Senate hopeful Cory Booker exchanged private direct messages on Twitter with a Portland stripper named Lynsie Lee last February. “The East Coast loves you, and by the East Coast I mean me,” Booker wrote in one. Lee and Booker both appeared in a movie about Twitter called Follow Friday, which appears to be why they started tweeting at each in the first place.

I didn't watch everything on TV today, but really, what could possibly top this?

Earlier this week, Forbes released its annual breakdown of "Hip-Hop Cash Kings"—the highest-paid rap artists of the last year. It's an interesting calculation for many reasons, including the revelations that Pitbull made more than Drake, that both Nicki Minaj and Avicii brought in more than Kanye, and that the top 20 spots contain five white guys, one of whose names rhymes with Tacklebore.

Too lazy to spend years learning how to kill beautiful animals from nearly a mile away? Or are you merely rich and incompetent, with a desire to shoot something to death from a far distance? Maybe both? If so, great news! For just $27,500, you can buy a rifle that—with only 30 minutes of instruction—will transform you from a novice to an expert marksman capable of hitting a target 1,200 yards away.

Quin Woodward Pu, a 26-year-old DC "memoirist" who runs a Beltway "events, society, and gossip" blog called Little Black Blog, recently got dumped via text message.

JPMorgan Chase is reportedly considering an $11 billion settlement over its handling of mortgage-backed securities leading up to the recession. "Billion" with a "B."

Florida Attorney General Pam Bondi apologized yesterday for delaying a man's execution because it conflicted with a reelection fundraiser she'd planned.

Residents of Dallas and neighboring Metroplex cities awoke this morning to find the air filled with countless sticky, silky white strands of an unknown nature. "Relax," says CBS DFW, "it’s just spiders."

Never trust your smartphone again. According to the British website Trending Central, Richard Barnes, the former deputy mayor of London and member of England’s right-wing Conservative Party, accidentally uploaded several pictures of his naked torso and unclothed crotch to his public Facebook page—apparently because Barnes activated the Facebook iPhone app’s auto-upload feature. His Facebook followers took several screenshots before he deleted them.

David Gilmour is a singer in Pink Floyd. The less famous David Gilmour is an author and professor at the University of Toronto. That David Gilmour is, as of today, most famous for declaring that "What I teach is guys."

A Chinese man whose suffered severe nasal trauma in a traffic accident last year has been growing a new nose on his forehead for the last nine months.

Career and personal life are in the toi-toi? Considering leaping from a tall building? Do a twice-weekly podcast in your garage!

A terrifyingly beautiful New York City woman is either preparing the most exquisite, slow-burn revenge murder of all time or has lost her goddamn mind, the New York Post reports today.

Be warned: The video you are about to see features a baby girl tasting ice cream for the very first time and is dangerously adorable.

Wednesday afternoon, the FBI released a video of Aaron Alexis as he prowled through the Washington Navy Yard, armed with a shotgun. The FBI also released a timeline of the events leading up to the shooting.

Scientists say that excessive stress can rewire your brain so that "neutral" odors smell bad to you, which probably explains the excessive cologne usage of middle school boys on dates.

Bill de Blasio, the Democratic nominee for New York City mayor, seriously regrets attending an event honoring Zimbabwe President Robert Mugabe in 2002. De Blasio currently leads Republican opponent Joe Lhota by 41 points.

Austin Wedding photographer Larry Busby is so desperate for a girlfriend, he's willing to pay a finders fee of $1,500 to anyone who can help him find one (there's an extra $1,000 in it for you "if this turns into marriage").

The New Republic, which was bought by Harvard graduate and Facebook co-founder Chris Hughes in 2012, performed a searching investigation: “Revealed: The Insiders Whose Kids Got White House Internships”!

The talkathon by Senator Ted Cruz is almost certainly the most newsworthy speech that's been given by a member of the Senate on the Senate floor today or yesterday. Yet some of the response to it from the news media has been dismissive. Dylan Byers, the dumbest reporter alive, dedicated an item in The Politico to trying to think about what it all means (it means: "Media Bias").