Melissa Cronin · 04/10/16 01:35PM

“Tickling a juvenile chimpanzee is a lot like tickling a child,” writes Frans de Waal, a primatologist and professor of psychology at Emory University, in an excellent piece about anthropomorphism of animals in The New York Times. Get ready to go into a YouTube black hole.

The Boston Globe Made a Joke, I Guess

Melissa Cronin · 04/10/16 11:09AM

The long-awaited “front page we hope to never publish” from the Boston Globe is here, and it is reportedly a “joke.”

Melissa Cronin · 04/10/16 10:51AM

“They’re not real,” says Game of Thrones star Peter Dinklage, in a Clickhole-esque interview with The New York Times’ Maureen Dowd. “The dragons are just a projection.”

Melissa Cronin · 04/09/16 10:30AM

“If Satan had the lead on him and was one delegate away from being nominated as our candidate, and Donald Trump was the alternative, I might vote for Donald Trump,” said Craig Dunn, an Indiana GOP leader who spoke to Politico about his state’s battle with the Republican presidential frontrunner. Despite this, Trump is still performing poorly among Satanists, trailing woefully behind a much more attractive candidate.

Report: Hillary Clinton Used Static Noise Machine to Prevent Reporters from Hearing Fundraising Speech

J.K. Trotter · 04/08/16 06:50PM

On Thursday, Hillary Clinton delivered a fundraising speech at the private residence of Colorado’s governor, John Hickenlooper, in Denver’s Park Hill neighborhood. The venue, a tent pitched on Hickenlooper’s lawn, was positioned close to the nearest street, which would have (theoretically) enabled non-guests to listen in on Clinton’s remarks. According to an on-scene reporter, however, the Democratic frontrunner’s campaign used a “static noise machine”—i.e., a larger speaker blasting static interference—to prevent such eavesdropping:

Gabrielle Bluestone · 04/08/16 04:40PM

Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. has reportedly banned his daughter, a founding member of the “Snapchat Bunch,” or whatever, from using social media after he discovered she had been leaving rude comments on an Instagram account belonging to 500 Days of Kristin creator Allie Jones. Dads—they have neither chill, nor the ability to find their daughters’ backup accounts.

Like You, Bernie Sanders Knows a Thing or Two About the West Wing from Watching "The West Wing"

Kelly Stout · 04/08/16 01:52PM

As your mom has no doubt already texted you, Bernie Sanders appeared on “The View” this morning. Sanders told Raven-Symone that Martin Sheen’s work on “The West Wing” was his favorite fictional portrayal of a President, a position on this issue that solidly aligns him with the nation’s College Democrats presidents and Model UN delegates. He likes it because he “thought that was actually fairly reflective of what does go on in the White House.”