To Senator Ted Cruz, Governor John Kasich, and businessman Donald Trump: Gawker is proud to invite you to its 2016 GOP Presidential Town Hall: Your Vape, Your Voice.

Peggy Noonan’s body may be in Manhattan, and her soul may be in Ronald Reagan’s coffin—but her mind, now and forever, is in Brooklyn, at a street fair she went to a few years back.

One does not simply walk into Grumman Studios, site of Wednesday night’s Donald Trump rally in Bethpage, Long Island: one takes a shuttle bus packed to the bursting point with people who want to make America great again.

Michele Bachmann, a mother-of-five in town from a flyover state, successfully operated a New York City subway turnstile this morning, and on her first try no less—much better than can be said of Hillary Clinton.

What does it take for Donald Trump to give up on an employee? He seems to be cool with staffers who manhandle women, casually use the term “half-breed,” and maybe, who knows, possibly literally sleep with the enemy. But jeeeeeez, lose one state and all of a sudden he’s hiring “professionals” to take over his clusterfuck of a campaign.

Hillary Clinton already knows the truth is out there. But now, Clinton campaign chair John Podesta confirmed that Hillary wants to get that truth out to the people, too. Does this mean that aliens are real and Hillary knows it? Almost certainly, yes.

What do former First Lady Laura Bush, IMF chief Christine Lagarde, Cambridge classicist Mary Beard, and comedian Mindy Kaling have in common? They are all women. And... and??

Help, I’m lost inside an alternate reality crafted for me by the Ted Cruz campaign and I cannot escape.

At the invitation of none other than Cool Pope Francis himself, Bernie Sanders will be taking a trip to the to speak at the Vatican just four days before the New York primary.

Ted Cruz arrived at a matzoh bakery in Brighton Beach, Brooklyn on Thursday afternoon where he was met with cheers of “Jews for Cruz.” There he rolled out some unleavened bread dough with kids from the Hasidic Jewish community and, as if that weren’t enough, joined in a rendition of the Passover song “Dayenu.”

Ridesharing app Uber settled a civil lawsuit with the district attorneys in Los Angeles and San Francisco over claims that the company overstated the rigor of its background checks. As part of the settlement the company, which is valued at over $64 billion, will pay up to $25 million to the respective cities.

Republican presidential candidate Ted Cruz, seen above guffawing at a rendering of himself as a prison inmate, is slowly becoming his party’s last hope. The New York Times reported on a recent fundraiser for the Cruz camp held at the Knickerbocker Club, one of the New York’s most elite establishments.

Typically, Elmos don’t come to Times Square to make friends. They do it to make money. A bill passed by the New York City counsel on Thursday could hurt Times Square performers’ chances of doing either. That includes some 300 topless women, the ticket vendors, and the costumed characters.

Earlier today police in San Fransisco shot and killed a homeless Latino man who they say was charging at them with a knife. Two eyewitnesses who say they were within 10 feet of the shooting immediately came forward with a different version of events.

We all know that former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani is a hard man to please. The guy has even denounced Beyoncé.

The fact-checkers over at Politifact work tirelessly to keep America’s political reporting, sacred as it is, free from misinformation. Now, they’re taking on perhaps the biggest threat to our—totally not compromised—political news cycle: Bloggers.

Donald Trump’s bold and short-lived pronouncement that women who get abortions should be punished failed to translate for a coalition of anti-abortion groups that, looking to him as a sort of father figure, faced the harsh realization that he had no interest in raising them.

Bill Clinton was supposed to be stumping for Hillary Clinton in Philly today. Instead, he spent a considerable amount of time explaining to Black Lives Matter protestors why they need to stop being so loud.

Among the ethical and moral quandaries North Carolina waded into when Governor Pat McCrory signed the state’s noxious LGBT bill into law, there was a more pragmatic question: How the hell are police supposed to enforce the biological-sex bathroom provision? It sounds like the cops have no idea.