China and North Korea are the happiest nations on Earth, while people in the United States are utterly miserable, according to a completely objective survey by North Korean researchers. Groundbreaking.

In a "Gross National Happiness" index compiled by the Glorious Democratic People's Republic of Korea, China ranked first, followed by North Korea. The United States was ranked dead last at number 203, while capitalist running dog South Korea was ranked 152nd, according to a summary in the International Business Times. The survey presumably excluded the hundreds of thousands of people estimated to live in North Korea's horrific prison camps.

[Via BoingBoing; photo via Getty]