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• Too weak to even walk through a grocery store, Nicole Richie must ride in a shopping cart pushed by assisted living specialist Mischa Barton. [TMZ]
• If youth is wasted on the young, then it's the same with karaoke. In Flushing, however, Grandma can get her groove on. [NYM]
SpotBit is an electronic archive of several current magazines — all of which you can download for free, in full. We'd encourage you to go and stick it to the man, but this shit likely won't make much of a difference. [via Big and Sharp]
• Axl Rose and Sebastian Bach hit 6's and 8's, party like it's 1984. [Animal]
• In order to tame and defeat Eurotrash, you must first learn to understand the bare-chested breed. [Save Manny]
• It's hard to care about celebrity lookalikes. But it helps if the doppelgangers are making porn. [Fleshbot]