1. His Name is No, Dr. No - Some hippie was once so enthralled by his resistance to the word "yes" that s/he sent him a giant "NO" in gratitude. He loves it so.

This memo went out to the relatively small newsroom staff at the International Herald Tribune in Paris, from executive editor Alison Smale and NYT exec Marty Gottlieb, asking the staff there to voluntarily donate their unused vacation days and/ or 5% of their salaries, to help the paper survive financially and avoid layoffs. Wow.

Is the banker suit dead? Yes, according to the same guy that NYT fashion trend story reporter David Colman has quoted four times:

Voicemail is totally dead. It takes too much listening. Is this just some fancy notion, or the truth? Either way, it's a New York Times trend story, blammo!

In your troubling Wednesday media column: layoffs at Conde Nast and the Boston Globe, Bill Keller fights back, King's officially dead, North Korea's still mean to journalists, and more:

For your perusal. The salary cut memo:

Last Saturday, the NYT ran a breezy op-ed by Daphne Merkin, blaming widespread willful delusion for the Bernie Madoff debacle. No wonder. Her brother is the scam's biggest sucker.

In your servile Thursday media column: the scoop on Steve Bartelstein, the Singapore Judiciary blows, Eric Holder's willing to help newspapers die slower, which is good, because nobody wants to pay much for one:

In your sunny Friday media column: Dan Peres has balls, high school reporters have dreams, Arthur Sulzberger has an honest moment, and the media at large has nothing to look forward to:

In your funereal Thursday media column: the Rocky Mountain News is dead, we'll all see more dead soldiers, the New York Times is dying slowly [UPDATED: ad layoffs], and Tribune is dying quickly:

It's Thursday—the day when the New York Times Style section constructs tenuous trend stories designed to infuriate us about largely illusory issues! Woo hoo! Today's trend: crazy parents turn their kids into health food zombies!

The "Dating a Banker Anonymous" girls, who quickly became America's least favorite gold diggers when the NYT profiled them last month, now say that they were just playing around! But this doesn't absolve them, no:

Peter Chernin stepped down as Rupert Murdoch's #2 man at News Corp yesterday; now the stories hit, complete with the attendant flackery. Would a News Corp-owned paper report it differently? Let's see!

The New York Post issued an angry non-apology for Sean Delonas' monkey cartoon. The New York Times issued a mealy-mouthed non-apology for its winking John McCain(*cough*SEX*cough*)-lobbyist story. Please; it's very important to non-apologize correctly:

In your downward Friday media column: rumored layoffs at Playboy and Hearst, two-paper towns are dying, your favorite crappy TV channels revealed, and more!

The New York Times Co. just announced that it's suspending its dividend. Its dividend per share will now be zero cents. What does this mean? That it sucks to be a Sulzberger, for one.

Weep for the DABA girls: an actual statistical analysis of the New York Times' wedding page reveals that finance guys just aren't getting married as much as they used to. Because they're all fired, probably!

New deal at the New York Times: buy an ad, and they'll throw in a free feature story! We kid. But seriously, those fake Amish fireplace ads will save journalism one way or another. [NYT]

The New York Times now considers the mere fact that someone is a Wall Street executive to be a sufficient reason to grant them automatic anonymity in a story. So the neighbors don't find out.

Journalists tend to be liberals because they tend to be educated but not wealthy, and haughty smartasses. So it's no surprise ex-journalists are pouring into Obama administration jobs. Why can't they just admit their fandom?