A few weeks ago, Mitt Romney stuffed his foot in his mouth after proving to the common folk at a NASCAR race that he was a fan of the sport because he has "some great friends who are NASCAR team owners." This week, he somehow crammed the other foot in there by repeating almost literally the exact same thing about the NFL.

There is a very rural New England debate raging in the small town of Mont Vernon, N.H. (pop. 2,400), this week, as residents prepare to vote over whether or not to change the name of a local, manmade body of water named "Jew Pond."

Paris Fashion Week, with its flurry of models, luxury brands, fashionistas, onlookers and press, has now drawn to a close. During the course of its final days, we stalked around many of the shows and parties to capture a view of the atmosphere in the City of Lights. Scenes of the past week include glimpses of the runway, the outdoor scenes before and after the shows and backstage areas abuzz with activity to spy models in their natural habitat.

Before he was arrested last December, Chief Keef, a 16-year-old hip-hop star, was almost completely unknown outside of Chicago's South Side. He had a song called "Bang," which had more than 400,000 views on YouTube, and he had a mixtape, and a dedicated following amongst Chicago high school students. But he was not a rapper who was known outside of the local high schools. His Facebook profile indicated that he worked as a sales rep for "Selling Dope." He lived with his grandmother.

It's been some time since we were bombarded by a perfect pop song, and even longer since we've been bombarded by a perfect pop song from a young Canadian pop idol, but 26-year-old Carly Rae Jepsen has fulfilled both world shortages with a single, maddeningly addicting song: "Call Me Maybe."

The recently-opened Olive Garden in Grand Forks, N.D., is off to a great start, according to Marilyn Hagerty, longtime food critic for the Grand Forks Herald. The restaurant "is the largest and most beautiful" in town and has been patronized by visitors "from out of town as well as people who live here," Hagerty reports in yesterday's positive review.

The very cheery Harris sisters from Tulsa, Okla.—gunning for you, Hanson—and the other eight members of their family have released a soft-rock ode to "our man" Rick Santorum. Did you know that God gave us the Bill of Rights?

A friend and graduate of Columbia's journalism school noticed this incredible update in his monthly alumni update email blast today, and thought to pass it along, because oh my god, it is fantastic. Amidst the general, self-congratulatory notes—"Peter Hoffmann '60 has revised and expanded his 2001 book," "Anusha Shrivastava '02 was elected president of..."—lies this gem:

Daniel Salinas, a mayoral candidate in Sunland Park, N.M., beat out two others in Tuesday night's election despite the fact that he is been banned from City Hall amid a lap-dancing extortion controversy:

Newt Gingrich was scheduled to speak in front of the American Israel Public Affairs Committee (AIPAC) yesterday, but Newt Gingrich was sleepy, because Newt Gingrich is running a very serious and totally earnest presidential campaign here.

The long national nightmare of wondering whether or not Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi is, in fact, with child, is finally over: The Jersey Shore star saved the announcement for an Us Weekly cover. She's 15 weeks into her pregnancy, and she's engaged to her boyfriend, Jionni LaValle.

"I'm pissed off," the notorious hacker Sabu told me on the phone last September, lamenting the latest arrests in a worldwide crackdown on the hacking collective Anonymous. "I'm getting real sad, with all the bullshit. It's all media hunger on the side of the FBI, my nigga."

Provocateur, website founder and collector of America's largest wads of spittle Andrew Breitbart died last Thursday morning, when some sentient shred of his cardiac organ kamikazed out of an exhausted sense of justice.

The majority of the American Juggalo population only gets together once a year, at the annual Gathering of the Juggalos in Cave-in-Rock, Ill., and so it makes perfect sense that the community has now established its very own online base: JuggaloBook is the Juggalos' very own Facebook.

Rush Limbaugh is a distended gout-ridden white supremacist who ruined his hearing with illegal prescription pain-killers. He said a bad word. Everyone is mad at him. On the internet, they call this trolling. It must stop.

Lindsay Lohan had her big return as host of Saturday Night Live this weekend, and when it was over, she went home, drank some hot tea with honey, and called it a night.

Emma Barnett, digital media editor for the Daily Telegraph, found these care instructions in her boyfriend's "new trousers" and shared the message in the world on Twitter. She says she's received an "overwhelming response" from the post and will publish more information about the brand tomorrow.

The New York Times today has a story about the "flaws" in the Russian presidential election, won yesterday by (surprise!) Vladimir Putin. Election observers, report David M. Herszenhorn, "issued a harsh critique" of Putin's "preordained and unfair" victory.

Virginia congressman Eric Cantor went on Meet the Press yesterday to endorse Mitt Romney, and he said "fart" instead of "fought." The representative has a point, of course. The GOP primary race has essentially been one giant, continuous, squelching fart joke. [Via]

Last week, I shared with you this demented drawing my little brother made when he was six years old, and asked for submissions of your most terrifying and otherwise surreal childhood drawings. You did not disappoint.