'HI, HOW ARE YOU DOING IN HELL': A Collection of Your Most Demented Children's Drawings
Last week, I shared with you this demented drawing my little brother made when he was six years old, and asked for submissions of your most terrifying and otherwise surreal childhood drawings. You did not disappoint.
Here's a sampling. Thanks for submitting.
From Carrie: "My 8yr old drew this Sundance picture—after a unit on the Otoe tribe she brought home this cheerful drawing. It says 'The Sundance (hooks in chest.)' The ladies are saying 'You can do it.'" Tallulah is now 9.
Aaron: "I was a counselor at an art camp when I was a teenager. One day an instructor had the bright idea to eat time by having the campers draw their counselors. I was 8 year old Molly's muse. The first pic is her meditation on me."
elkhy326: "I was leaving for a summer internship in 2009. My little sister, then six years old, drew me a picture to express how much she loved me. Here she is crying over my grave, which she appears to have dug herself (notice the shovel)."
The note reads: "Daer Sarah I nowe hawe much you love me bot i love you more evin wane you are ded."
emmajd7: "Here's mine: love (sex) at night. I don't remember drawing this but I'm sure it was done in secret."
Eric: "A few years ago, while checking out the artwork displayed at a P.S. in NYC, I came across this masterpiece. I can't say that I know the child artist but his perspective on life was light-years ahead of his/her innocent-minded classmates and their respective 'cheerful' drawings."
Tabithaiapetus: "My friends kid drew this years ago and I keep it framed in my office. I work in children's television so it makes sense. I mean 1/2 these people around here must be stoned."
The caption reads: "He's a lunitic! His eyes are un-focused because he took a drug."
hohoemi: "This is a picture I drew when I was 4 or 5 of my dad running over my cat with his station wagon. (Cat was apparently asleep behind one of the wheels when my dad backed out of the driveway). For some reason I felt the need to commemorate the event. I like the big smile I gave the cat :)"
iElvis: "My 7 year old made this for his brother one night a while back. Note the buttocks in the middle."
Jamie: "So my five year old wanted to write a thank you note to a friend and insisted writing the letters herself. She came to tell me she already [wrote] Thank You all by herself."
Justin: "Couldn't pass up the opportunity to share this gem from my little sister. She was probably three years old at the time. Although she was as cute as an Olson twin, she was ferocious as a wet cat.
She was pissed at my mother for something and drew this gem.
Some details worth noting:
- Lainie is my mother's name. She liked to call her by her first name in lieu of "mom" when she was angry.
- My mother's dress is falling off and her nipples are showing.
- My mom is a brunette, but apparently my sister thought that categorizing my mother in the ginger minority would be a low blow.
- Not sure about the cauldrons in the corner - those may have been depictions of my father and I. I was probably the happy one - happy about her suffering."
Karlin: "Here is a drawing from when I was 8, of Frankenstein's funeral. I don't know why I drew it, but I did mention on his tombstone that he was a "bad boy.' I'm 29 now, and I still like to draw & I still like bad boys!"
Kim: "The husband and I were a little o_O when our 4 year old girl brought this one home from jk. VERY relieved when she told us it was a self portrait with a broom."
LagunaBitch: "True story: Wrote this and gave it to my mom at age 9. Surprisingly, therapy did not ensue. Although its weird she kept it..."
Laura Leu: "I saw your call-out for demented childhood drawings and thought I would send along a humdinger that my nephew Simon drew when he was six years old. It's from a 'book' he wrote called Under the Ocean, a story about a boy who went swimming and kept getting bitten by an angelfish. Although it was unintentional, the last page, when taken out of context, is hilariously sexual in nature. (Unless the boy had some sort of fish-biting fetish.)"
Lindsay: "my friend is a kindergarden teacher. this gem by danica is still up on her fridge from easter a couple of years ago. sorry jesus!"
Sam: "Last year I was at my boyfriend's parent's house looking through old photos (a rite of passage for any new girlfriend) when I stubbled upon a little gem, entitled, 'Monsters II.' I've attached a number of images from this-if you can believe it-laminated and bound book.
If my boyfriend wasn't so painfully normal, I'd worry he were a serial killer. Actually, as I type this sentence, I'm pretty confidant that's what the families of all murdered women say right before their daughters are discovered at the bottom of Lake Wallenpaupack. More than anything, I'm relatively concerned that the teacher who allowed him to write this book, illustrate it, and then bound it for him is still out there somewhere, teaching.
Make note that although I've only attached four images, this book is actually about 30 pages long. (My favorite is the pencil man.)"
The captions read: "The door man. He throws door knobs at you and you die," and "The pencil man. He throws out led and erases you."
The O'Donnell family: "I'm afraid CPS will be after me for this one."
From Linda (Subject: "drawing from Alex Pareene's little brother"): "i am attaching a picture Alex's little brother, Jake, drew after Alex made him mad (probably by being a wiseacre). Jake drew the picture then placed it in Alex's room as a menacing warning of what was next for Alex. Jake was around 6 when he drew this. Alex loved and cherished the drawing so much he hung it up in his room, where it hangs to this day."
The note reads: "if Alex ever rides a bike again... this is what will happen"
Via Robbiecda, from "Karah": "Dear mom, you are my favorit mommy ever. I'm sorry for calling you a pice of poo. And I hate you and not going to my room. I love you mommy. Love, your dautre Karah"
Russell: "I'm not [sure] if demented or surreal cover it... But these are some very weird/sad drawings of mine that I found in my mom's house a few months ago. Enjoy?"
The note reads: "April 14, 1988: 1. Who made the alphabete. 2. how life started. 3. who thought music. 4. who thought words. 5. who chopped the ladie into more than 100 peices."
Sandra: "this is the cover of my 7 year old son Marshall's book. that's a giant squirrel shooting a man..."
Suzannah: "This is from my daughter, who in first grade was obsessed with the comic book character Lenore. Unfortunately, her teacher was not familiar with Lenore and the following (rhyming! metered!) story got me called in to perch precariously, sweating, on a 6" plastic chair to discuss whether or not DCFS needed to be called. A little context went a long way and fortunately her teacher knew (and liked) her well enough to trust that the authorities need not be involved."
The note reads: "My sisters hair is made out of spegeti. (And she eats poo too) you might think shes cute. (But she doesent like you) And you might love her too. But be careful she will eat you too. But I have taken a picture of her naked. And shes mostly like a dead mouse rotening as small as can be. But do not love her for she will kill you by tomorrow (be carefull to.) So be le ven me untill this day is night. And evry night she kills someone. And i hope it is you tonight."
Unicycle: "Here's my favorite 'fridge' art from one of my kids; she was going on 7 at the time."
And finally, illustrator Devin Clark adapted a child's drawing of "Canibalistic Hill": "The original Canibalistic Hill was the product of eight year old Pablo Blanco and his twisted little mind. Upon seeing it I had to accept the sad reality that I would never be able to come up with anything as bizarre and disturbing on my own. My only recourse was to copy it. I Thank you, Pablo Blanco." (Click bottom right to enlarge.)