The New York Times conducts its own analysis and concludes that, in New York City at least, more rainy days means fewer homicides. However, given the ongoing depressing Year Without a Summer around these parts, there's no discussion of suicides.

Oh dear, whispers Page Six this morning. Kerry Washington—an up-and-coming actress who sure is taking a while to get up-and-over-here—is moving to New York to star in a play. And she can only pay $3,000 a month!

So. What's up in Albany? Nothing. Nothing at all. It has actually been too depressing to even occasionally update you. Well, it's also been kind of funny. But now something might happen!

Albany is such a joke, the Post photoshopped everyone as scary clowns and the Times handed over its op-ed page to the funniest/scariest clown of all, Rudy Giuliani.

As previously rumored, Katie Holmes and her dashing space bride Tom Cruise might be moving to New York permanently. (As permanent as movie stars move, anyway). The Village Voice thinks they may have tracked down their new pad.

[Whitney Port films for "The City" in the Village today; image via Splash]

Katie Lee Joel's whirlwind princess tour of the sweet life is coming to an end. The cook and gadabout town is splitting up with her kajllionaire husband, stunt driver Billy Joel. Rumor is she's been cheating, also that he's old.

If you're like us, your high school graduation was in some sweaty gymnasium or on a grass-barren athletic field. Not so for the youngs of wealthy New York, who graduated in glorious fashion recently. The New York Observer was there.

[Bobby Patentleather is filming in Washington Square Park right now, ladies!; image via Bauer-Griffin]

Wonderful news: Hiram Monserrate is a Democrat again! The New York state Senator who famously glassed his girlfriend and whose term cannot end soon enough switched back to caucusing with his party and doomed the Senate to (yet more) gridlock.

New York's fate rests in the open palms of a guy who lives in Westchester but represents the Bronx and who works in a little shithole 130 miles up the Hudson from here. And the guy who slashed his girlfriend.

[Whitney Port of "The City" eats lunch with a friend in the West Village yesterday; image via INF]

[A couple gets married (or pretends to get married? maybe they're models?) in the new High Line Park on the West Side, which just opened today; image via i'mjustsayin's Flickr]

Oh, hey, Democrats no longer control the New York State Senate. Who are our heroic new Republican senators? Transit-hating Pedro Espada Jr. and—wait for it—girlfriend-abusing (accused) criminal Hiram Monserrate!

The years-old, six-story, block-lettered DKNY mural, featuring Lady Liberty, that greeted those headed south down Broadway into Soho has been painted over. Clothing store Hollister (ugh) has moved into the retail space at 600 Broadway, so they want the wall.

Ever wander up Fifth Avenue and wonder about the earthly delights behind the cloistered co-op walls? A tipster browsing the Sotheby's listings discovered that just because it's expensive doesn't mean you should be jealous.

Hey, David Paterson won a political battle! But he did it on a Friday afternoon, so no one will notice, or care.

Designer Diane von Furstenberg, who lives high above her store in a glassy rooftop aerie, is very mad at the new-ish Standard Hotel. See, the Meatpacking District trend-haus has windows that look directly into Furstenberg's crag-like lair.

[Kirsten Dunst on her way to Whole Foods in the East Village; image via INF]

Lehman Bros.' former CEO Dick Fuld was having trouble selling his Upper East party palace with a $32 million asking price so he took it off the market. Now someone's offering $27 million and he's thinking it over. [NYP viaCityfile]