Only the ex-governor knows what's right for New York (as the next comptroller?), and he's going to prove it this weekend at the red carpet event for the film about him, and in interviews with his former madame. [Politico]

The President will speak at Cooper Union today, where he plans to chastise Wall Street while spelling out the details of his proposed financial regulation bill. Fearful of looking worse than they already do, some Republicans are signing on. [NYT]

Andrew Cuomo, currently running for governor of our hearts (and, unofficially, for governor of the state of New York), has filed suit against New York State Senator Pedro Espada Jr. for being incredibly corrupt.

For only around $14m, you can be your very own complete asshole, living in the massive Chelsea loft owned by LaBeouf's fast-talkin' up-and-comer, and Gordon Gekko protégé, in the upcoming finance thriller sequel. 3,500 sq. feet of outdoor space!

The worst part of being stranded at the airport due to an Icelandic volcano? It's not being trapped on the road or shut out of hotels. It's having no place to shower!

What does New York Sen. Chuck Schumer like on his heros? Roast beef, extra pickles, and the blood of Republican opponents. It's nice that there's a NY politician whose name, seen in a headline with "sandwich," doesn't give us shudders.

New York State Senator Pedro Espada Jr. is one of the three or four worst people in Albany. So let's all support the nice-seeming lady who is running against him. Ok?

Hopefully another step in getting Constance McMillen, lesbian prom crusader, out of her repressive Mississippi town: She's been named a grand marshal for this year's New York Gay Pride Parade! Maybe she can look at apartments while she's here. [NYDN]

Not satisfied with conquering just the fancy clothes market, freewheeling libertine Marc Jacobs is now opening a book store, called Book Marc, across the street from Magnolia Bakery. How many copies of Maurice will there be? Many, hopefully. [Racked]

As we prepare ourselves for the excitement of Eliot Spitzer's return, we should remind ourselves what the onetime governor of New York stood for: accountability, responsibility, and banging three different hookers in a single day.

Starting Tuesday, employed residents of New York City homeless shelters will be charged rent. A family of three making $25,000/year will have to pay $926/month. The worst part: Mike Bloomberg is your new landlord. Take that, homeless people! [NYDN]

Charles Carl Paladino, a Tea Partier running for New York's GOP gubernatorial nomination, thinks it's funny that Barack Obama is black and also the president, so he forwarded emails pointing that out to friends but he's not a racist, OK?

Charlie Rangel is a horrible congressman because he's hopelessly corrupt and doesn't pay his taxes. But he's popular in Harlem, so the only guy rising to unseat him is the son of the horrible congressman that Rangel unseated.

Lots of activity on Twitter and blogs tonight about a huge fire at 285 Grand Street in Chinatown. According to the Times at least ten people were injured in the fire, which spread to three buildings. Video and photos inside.

The economy crashed. People tipped less. So workers began placing tip jars on every possible surface to remind us. Then people got annoyed with the jars and their witty slogans. What's next? We predict wrestling for ones. [NYP, pic via]

"It doesn't have to be through public office. It could be, uh, volunteerism, for example.... There's lots of different ways you can help." Mike Bloomberg's advice for Eliot Spitzer (who was hosting a show on MSNBC at the time).

Ever wonder what would happened if classic 8-bit '80s arcade games attacked New York City? Well wonder no more. Filmmaker Patrick Jean has created a funky little short, Attack of the Pixels, depicting just such an event. It's pretty neat!

Fortune Magazine just posted an interview with America's favorite hooker-loving ex-governor, Eliot Spitzer. He wants to stage a comeback. Now the question is: How long before we start getting the mailers?

In Manhattan's "sublet/temp wanted" section of Craigslist, we find "director needs room": "I am looking for a room/apt. for myself and my daughter. We share a bed. Prefer midtown for UWS." Is that you, Woody Allen? Screenshot and Update.

New York's pizza guys: These are some guys to have on your side during the inevitable Peak Oil apocalypse. Proof: On Friday, a delivery guy for Famous Famiglia in East Harlem avoided armed robbery and delivered his pie still-piping.