A report by the Arkansas State Crime Lab has ruled that Chavis Carter, who died while handcuffed in the back of a police cruiser, committed suicide with a handgun that was overlooked by officers.

Teresa Carter maintains that police in Arkansas killed her son, but officials continue to insist that 21-year-old Chavis Chacobie Carter shot himself in the head despite being handcuffed in the back of a Jonesboro Police cruiser.

That's what doctors would like to know.

The mother of a man who police in Jonesboro, Arkansas, claim shot himself in the head while handcuffed in the back of a cruiser isn't convinced she's being told the truth about what happened to her son.

There are the standard concerns when walking down the street: dog crap, jutting tree roots, people sleeping. But imagine stepping onto organs.

Well, this is weird. Florida authorities are stumped as to how a charred grand piano—weighing 650 pounds—appeared on the high point of a sandbar in Miami's Biscayne Bay. They're not going to remove it, either! Here's a video.

Last night's episode of Community provided a mystery for Jeff and Annie to figure out: Jeff lies about a 1-credit course and a man with a "Professor Professorson" ID comes to the rescue. Kinda. Brace yourselves for guns a 'blazin!

The premiere Family Guy was an hour-long mystery done in the classic style of "whodunnit" movies. Admittedly sick of Family Guy's same-old-shtick, it was surprisingly plot-driven and delightful to watch. Because it's easily watched online, this post is spoiler-free!

Tonight is the premiere of The Event, NBC's latest stab at a big, loud, rumbling mystery machine, a hybrid of Lost's tantalizing obfuscation and 24's globe-trotting government intrigue. It's not a miniseries, it's a full series-series. So can it work?

Two years ago, the FBI destroyed documents that "may have" contained information about Walter Cronkite. What documents? We don't know. Why were they destroyed? Good question!

Sure, other writers have gone to seduction classes undercover. But how many were female? And how many told their male classmates they'll always be "schlubby" beta males?

· Just weeks before he catapulted himself into the celebrity gossip stratosphere as America's Next Top Porn Star, we were fortunate enough to snag a few precious seconds with Verne Troyer on the red carpet at the MTV Movie Awards. We broke into the Defamer Time Capsule — hint: it's buried somewhere in the grassy knoll between Craft and the Death Star — to unearth this clip that showcases both Molls and myself being temporarily rendered speechless when we realized we were in the presence of the world's most famous little person (yes, and that includes Matt Roloff).
· Still thirsty for more deets on the Mini-Me sex tape? Well, here's another mystery solved. The young frenchee in question is none other than 22-year-old Ranae Shrider, an aspiring model from Kentucky. Welcome to the jungle, baby. [TMZ]
· Just in time for Wall-E to hit theaters, those loveable scamps over at Radar have put together a list of cinema's gayest robots. [Radar]
· Looking for the silver lining in the news that the Jennifer Aniston rom-com He's Just Not That Into You has has been pushed back until February 2009? Now there's plenty of time to get Jennifer Connelly involved in that planned Marie Claire cover shoot. Also? More competition for Valkyrie! [US Magazine]
· "I am single, I have no problem meeting women. Women approach me 6, 7 times a day." After listening to this hilariously pathetic voicemail, we think we may have stumbled onto the perfect castmember for Season Two of Vh1's The Pickup Artist. If anyone can help this guy, it's Mystery. [The Sherman Foundation]

The Pick-Up Artist, that peculiar VH1 reality show about a behatted k.d. lang impersonator named Mystery who helps nerdy men sleep with busty and lusty ladies, is coming back for a second season. And they want you, you big lame-o virgin dork. The casting agency (Impossible Casting, heh) recently sent out a call for men, 21-30, who are "shy/socially awkward when it comes to interacting with beautiful women" and who have "no clue what women want." (So, basically men who are sober, yes?) This is basically the same call that goes out for Beauty & the Geek, I'm guessing, except the intended end result is the boning of hot women rather than the befriending of them. Oh, and it's also totally cool if you're just an actor pretending to be one of these poor saps: "NOTE: ALSO INCLUDE PERFORMANCE VIDEOS OR ACTOR SLATES IF AVAILABLE. DO NOT SEND DEMO TAPES," says the casting email (loudly). So there you go, straight men who are awkward around women you'd like to sex (or are actors hoping to hitch their stars to Mystery's onyx-plated wagon), here's your chance. Full email after the jump.

Professional "pick-up artist" Mystery made the entire country feel slimy and gross with his VH1 show on how to pick up women by being disgusting. Now, of course, he's going to cash in on his infamy with absurdly-priced seminars across the country, hyped in the most douchey way conceivable. One email recipient said Mystery and his cohorts Matador and Lovedrop are asking for "thousands of dollars" to "expose you to highly sensitive information" on how to date the "hottest... girls on the planet." They've even set up a website with some kind of satellite imagery, no doubt intended to illustrated a building storm of douches soon to be unleashed on an unsuspecting world, plus a countdown timer for their "World Tour" of three continents, five countries and, supposedly, eight cities. The best part is still their email, excerpted after the jump.

From the Today Show yesterday, a good reason not to wear any kind of hand covering if you're a TV reporter: Because to the untrained eye, it sure can look like you're flicking off the entire crowd.

We've been waiting all week for word of the success or failure of New York magazine's sort-of maybe kinda identification of D. B. Cooper—who has become something of an American myth since he hijacked a Northwest plane in 1971 and made off with $200,000. So far we've gotten not much: "Bonney Lake residents doubt neighbor was D. B. Cooper," says the AP today. Meh. The suspect's brother, Lyle Christiansen of Minnesota, really really wanted Nora Ephron to direct the movie but of course she didn't even return his letters. (Just like that Eminem song Stan.) But how reliable a narrator is Lyle? In order to send Ephron the letter, he paid a gumshoe $495 to find her address. Really, how can one rely on the word of a man who can't figure out how Whitepages.com works?

In a tiny, cluttered, and yes, pizza-smelling office on Chrystie Street on Friday night, a group of sweaty thirtysomething men and heavily eyelinered young women gathered to celebrate the publication of a "pamphlet." The work in question resembles a foreshortened Zagat guide filtered through a Brooklyn-ey design sensibility; it contains two transcribed discussions that some very wise people had about what they wish they'd done differently in college. "I wish there were something else I was good at, just a little bit," the author Rebecca Curtis says in one of these discussions. "And not for the money, but just to be able to dip into something else, just to re-engage with the... the other world, the one that's not the literary world. Almost to perceive it better." But this party was not the place to find that other world, or even to acknowledge its existence.

"For my black nails I prefer Magic Polish. For the eyes I like MAC. For the lipstick on my cheek—womans preference." Claire Zulkey talks to megadouche pick-up artist "Mystery." [Zulkey]

Last night megadouche pick up artist "Mystery" was a guest on "Late Night with Conan O'Brien," where we learned that some of his most interesting lines come from the inside of a Snapple bottlecap. We also learned that we can barely stand to look at his ridiculous face anymore. One more episode of that show and we're DONE, please God. It's going to be so hard!

On last night's episode of "Who Wants To Be A Douche?" the remaining members of pick up artist Mystery's Douche Candidate School faced their toughest challenge yet: They had to bag a stripper. (If you can bag a stripper, apparently, you can bag anyone.) In this scene, contestant Brady manages to convince a comely lass to accompany him to a waiting limo. But will he pull the trigger? There's only one more episode of "The Pick Up Artist" left and, frankly, we're kind of relieved.