They weren't offering a job, but when Apple board members discussed CEO succession with the head of a "high profile technology company," as the Wall Street Journal reported, they surely knew they were planting a seductive thought: "I could replace the most famous business executive in the world."

What the fuck does Rupert Murdoch do all day? To judge by his baffling performance before a British parliamentary committee investigating him for phone hacking, little more than gossip on the phone with whatever old-timer is willing to indulge him while his son James and wife Wendi battle for control of News Corporation.

Rupert Murdoch has given his formal interview since his world started collapsing around him—to the Wall Street Journal, of course. We're sure it was a hard-hitting barrage of questions. The upshot: He thinks he's handled the crisis "extremely well in every way possible." Yes sir! I was just going to say that.

The hiring practices of Silicon Valley tech companies are famously rigorous, but Facebook must be the only one to test physical strength. Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg takes high-profile prospective hires for a hike behind the company's Palo Alto headquarters.

So shadowy digital repo concern Specific Media took MySpace off News Corp.'s hands for the joke sum of 35 million dollars. Thirty-five million dollars isn't cool. You know what's cool? Thirty-five billion dollars. And how do you make that much money? By getting Justin Timberlake to align his triple-platinum swag with your cobweb-strewn social networking relic.

Assless chaps."Full-on rager" partying. A Fire Department intervention. Peter Thiel's hedge fund might have cratered, but the objectivist Republican's private life is rocking.

Last week, a man imprisoned in New York said that he shot Tupac in an infamous 1994 robbery on the orders of Jimmy Henchman, a hip hop industry power player who became a wanted man earlier this year when he was charged with cocaine distribution. After a month on the run, Jimmy was arrested yesterday, holed up in a secret, faraway hideout:

Arianna Huffington was controversial back when she only oversaw 70 or so employees. Now that she's riding herd over 1,300 AOL journalists, the Huffington Post founder faces an army of disgruntled enemies. And they're leaking to the press.

Mark Zuckerberg has begun personally slaying animals for food, part of a resolution to fully appreciate the meat he eats. The Facebook CEO's slaughter has been wide ranging, claiming a goat, pig, chicken and a lobster.

It's the most adorable tech lawsuit ever! The family of the teenage founder of a popular Twitter account is suing his business partner for squeezing him out. Kids these days.

Deposed NBC potentate Jeff Zucker threw a bar mitzvah at the Four Seasons. The Zuckers were priced out of a Kanye appearance ($1 million), so they settled for Drake, some nice roast chicken, and Converse sneakers for everyone. Mazel tov!

Mexican You-Don't-Even-Want-to-Know-How-Many-Billionaire Carlos Slim is the richest man in the world (and subprime lender of choice for the New York Times!). He's also a monopolistic bastard, unsurprisingly.

Last July, New York Daily News editor Martin Dunn abruptly left the paper due to his wife's illness. Kevin Convey, who'd been working as editor of the Boston Herald, was named his replacement. But now, we hear, unsatisfied NYDN owner Mort Zuckerman may already be poking around for Convey's successor.

Alright: the latest Forbes' billionaire list is out. Now we can all get out our Sharpies and draw circles around which billionaires we're gonna date this year. Kidding: billionaires only date other billionaires and underwear models.

When Justin Timberlake was preparing to play Napster inventor and early Facebook investor Sean Parker in The Social Network, he asked for the real-life Parker's help and was famously rebuffed. Makes sense: Post-Social Network, Parker isn't happy at all with his newfound fame.

Two filmmakers have sued Harvey and Bob Weinstein's studio for more than $114 million, claiming that the Weinsteins ruined five animated film projects with their "indecisiveness and general incompetence." They would have filed the lawsuit earlier, they say, but the Weinsteins paid them $500,000 in quasi-hush money to delay it until after the Oscars so as not to sully their campaign for The King's Speech. Hollywood works in strange ways.

Canadian publisher Bluewater Productions has just published a 48-page comic book which tells the true origin story of Mark Zuckerberg. The center panel here depicts the time Zuckerberg was held up at gunpoint in 2005 while driving from Palo Alto to Berkeley. Of course, we all know what happened after that brush with danger: Zuckerberg built a bulletproof robotic exoskeleton in his basement and swore to devote his life to fighting crime. (Click to Enlarge)

Steve Jobs, rumored to be dying of cancer, was healthy enough to sit beside Obama at a dinner for tech moguls in San Francisco last night. Also in attendance: Mark Zuckerberg, who was pried out of his hoodie for the occasion, Google CEO Eric Schmidt, Yahoo! chief Carol Bartz and Twitter CEO Dick Costolo.

Even as he convalesces at home, nursing whatever mystery ailment he has, Apple CEO Steve Jobs "is staying closely involved in the company's strategic decisions and product development," according to the Wall Street Journal.

Julian Assange says he has loads of cables on Rupert Murdoch and Murdoch's News Corporation that will be automatically released if he meets an early demise. It's nice to see that the Wikileaks founder hasn't lost his melodramatic touch.