[Sasha Obama hams it up in the ocean while on vacation with her mother in Marbella, Spain. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

Rush is always so right about everything, isn't he? Well, not today! Rush decided to be as much of an ass as possible, claiming that the media's been "celebrating" Michelle Obama's Spanish vacation because of guilt over our "slave past."

It's not hard to make Laura Ingraham look stupid—Stephen Colbert did it just two nights ago!—but who would have thought that Bill O'Reilly would make Ingraham look stupid? Inside, video of their heated Factor discussion about school nutrition.

So Michelle Obama took a fancy trip to Spain with her daughter and friends. Is she history's greatest monster for this extravagance? Irate Daily News columnist Andrea Tantaros sure thinks so! Why can't Michelle Obama travel like an "average" person?

On the eve of first lady Michelle Obama's trip to Spain, the U.S. State Department removed an advisory warning Americans that "racist prejudices could lead to the arrest of Afro-Americans" there. So, no worries, Michelle! Have a great trip! [NYP]

[Michelle Obama looked as gorgeous as ever while vacationing in Marbella, Spain today with daughter Sasha and a group of friends. Barack's gonna get even more gray hair worrying about those lusty Spanish men around town. Image via AP]

Our child-president Barack Obama turns a sprightly 49 today, and everyone's excited. The Republican National Committee, for example, have set up a website where you can send very mean birthday cards to the commander-in-chief. Which will you choose?

Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it. George Bush announced that he hated broccoli, and earned powerful enemies. Today: Michelle Obama announces that she and her husband hate beets.

Michelle Obama is bored and so she will spend a few days in Spain, with one of the children — during Barack Obama's birthday! Now he'll just have a slumber party with Biden. And a $1.5 million fundraiser. [Image: AP]

[Michelle Obama sends a spray of foam flying while christening the U.S. Coast Guard cutter "Stratton" at a shipyard in Mississippi today. Image via AP]

[Michelle Obama gave the crowd a wave after addressing the graduating class of D.C.'s Anacostia Senior High School today. Image via Getty]

[You're not the only one looking forward to relaxing this weekend. Air Force One dropped off the first family in Chicago yesterday afternoon. Image via Getty]

[Michelle Obama practices her coordination at the "South Lawn Series." The series, a program of activities on the White House lawn, is a component of her "Let's Move" initiative to combat child obesity. Pic via Getty]

Bullshit allergies! Rachael Ray eats in the cafeteria! Michelle Obama hates Happy Meals! Books are organic to eat! Dave Zinczenko does not speak English! It's your important Health Watch, where we watch your health—while sipping juice-like beverages!

According to a new book, Carla Bruni told the First Lady that she and President Sarkozy had made a head of state wait while they had sex. Michelle apparently "laughed nervously." Some situations, not even Michelle Obama can save. [ABC]

Each year, around this time, dozens of celebrities fan out across America and descend on college towns in the middle of nowhere to deliver the same tired cliches to a group of hungover college students. Who are these people?

She knew they were related when he called himself P@t the R@t. Sienna and Jude are officially back together. Sandra's baby sells more magazines than Angelina's. Tuesday gossip is symbolic.

Jessica Simpson wants to be Michelle Obama, somehow. Jennifer Aniston is locked in a fitness war with a swimsuit model. Peaches wore a confederate flag shirt. Brooke Shields. Sunday's Gossip Roundup is giving a voice to the (literally) small people.

[Michelle Obama celebrates Arbor Day with a planting project at local school. Image via AP.]

Radical black nationalist Michelle Obama revealed the racist contents of her presidential iPod while brainwashing a crowd of children on Thursday: "Rhythm and blues" artist Beyonce, who is married to a known rapper, and also, Sting. Click for video.