The image of Michael Phelps as a fish in the streets and a real kinky guy in the sheets just got a big boost from Kim Petro, a plus-size dominatrix who apparently passed a lie detector test before selling her story to the National Enquirer.

22-time Olympic medalist Michael Phelps is engaged to marry girlfriend and former Miss California Nicole Johnson, the couple announced on social media last night.

In a sprawling Facebook post and subsequent interview with Radar Online, a woman named Taylor Lianne Chandler has made a number of fascinating claims about herself and her alleged relationship with Michael Phelps. Among them: she was born intersex, met the Olympic swimmer on Tinder, and fucked said Olympic swimmer on their first date watching football on TV.

Human-fish hybrid and Olympic gold medalist swimmer Michael Phelps announced in a series of tweets on Sunday morning that after getting his second DUI in ten years, he's decided to take some time away to attend a program where he will learn to "better understand" himself.

Olympic swimming star Michael Phelps was pulled over by Maryland police early this morning and arrested on a DUI charge, TMZ reports. He was apparently stopped by officers around 1:40 a.m. in a white Range Rover, driving 84 in a 45 zone, and allegedly failed a field sobriety test with a BAC of almost twice the legal limit.

When necessary, our dormant fitness column, "I of the Tiger," will return in order to address urgent fitness issues which demand a timely reckoning. This is one of those times.

"Does Every Olympic Athlete Get Rich Now?" E! Online asks.

The world was very excited to meet Michael Phelps' rumored girlfriend Megan Rossee when she stepped out with him in London on Monday night and now, after a cursory Googling of her name, the world has decided it hates her.

The Nation of Michael Phelps now has 19 Olympic medals, tied for 57th in the all-time Summer Games list. India has 21.

President Obama took to Twitter late Tuesday night to congratulate swimmer Michael Phelps on winning his 19th Olympic medal, and setting a new record for the most hardware earned by a single athlete.

Swimmer Ryan Lochte predicted that 2012 would be his year, and he's off to a great start. Lochte won the 400-meter individual medley, while teammate Michael Phelps didn't even make it onto the podium.

Swimmer and lazy person Michael Phelps announced Monday that he has dropped the 200-meter freestyle race from his London Olympic program, bringing his slate of events for the 2012 games down to a paltry seven.

The recording industry's Chosen One questions the machine that created him. Ashton and Demi "share love" in Israel. George Michael gets out of prison. Crystal Bowersox weds in a hemp dress decorated with seashells. Monday gossip has doubts.

Lohan's people will probably airbrush the SCRAM out of her nudie pics, but hopefully there will be outtakes. The Bachelor breaks up with his reality TV-anointed wife. Everybody who's anybody is posting Miley Cyrus crotch pictures, now. Tuesday gossip cometh.

MTV is having all their top moneymakers examined. Kate Gosselin hates the dancing stars in her galaxy. Corey Feldman is banned from Corey Haim's funeral. Martha Stewart can't get laid. Monday's gossip got up an hour late.

Jennifer Aniston takes Morocco by....storm? She's dating (or not dating) a camel. Posh Spice has bunions. Jake Gyllenhaal is special. Courtney Love's greatest hookup ever. Thanksgiving Dinner at the Waverly Inn. LiLo being LiLo. Presenting your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:

Mackenzie Phillips is setting the media ablaze with her revelation that she had sex with her father. Having come this far, just what will celebrity biographies have to confess to get attention a decade from now? Here's a preview!

• George Michael is back in the news and, as usual, it has nothing to do with his music. The singer was arrested on Friday for driving drunk when he crashed his car into a truck. Michael, however, is insisting he was sober at the time. So maybe he's just a bad driver? [NYDN, E!]
• Is Joe Simpson trying to push the producers of American Idol to hire Jessica Simpson to replace Paula Abdul? That's the rumor. [P6]
• Amy Winehouse's soon-to-be ex-husband, Blake Fielder-Civil says the singer has been "begging him to get back together." Uh oh. [DM]
• Beyoncé has been brushing up on her dance skills by "secretly" enrolling in ballet lessons at the Alvin Ailey School of Dance. [NYDN]

Earlier tonight Olympic stoner Michael Phelps was involved in a car accident in downtown Baltimore. Now we've learned that the precise location of the accident took place in heart of Baltimore's tranny-hooker district.

Olympic stoner Michael Phelps has been involved in an automobile accident in downtown Baltimore.