A judge has just suspended Katherine Jackson's guardianship of Michael Jackson's children (Prince, Paris, and Blanket), and installed the kids' cousin, TJ Jackson, in her place.

Everything just got crazy.

The internet is abuzz with rumors that Jackson family matriarch Katherine Jackson is M.I.A. — and with good reason. Late last night, her nephew reported that she was missing.

Michael Jackson died three years ago today, so here's my favorite remix of my favorite of his songs, done in the mid-90's by none other than the godfather of house, Frankie Knuckles. I love how Frankie keeps all of the elements in that matter (the strings, the horns, the bubble-keyboards) and emphasizes some to make them matter more — I never realized how gorgeous this vocal performance was until I heard the stripped-down intro.

This Sunday, Oprah is sitting down on a giant couch with Michael Jackson's daughter Paris to have a chat about (Oprah air-quotes) "normal" childhoods, coping with the death of a parent, and other very Oprah topics.

While Whitney Houston's funeral was invite-only, all of the citizens of Newark will end up contributing more than they realized. The city will have to pay its police force $187,000 in overtime.

The sale of late screen legend Elizabeth Taylor's concluded yesterday and the collection fetched more than $116 million, well above its estimate. La Liz is a blockbuster even in death!

Today the gambling website OnlineGamblingPal.com dropped $10,871 for a sample of entombed pop star Michael Jackson's old hair. Why so much? Because that's the going market rate for the amount of Michael Jackson hair you see in the photo. Also, they saw the hairball's potential—as a roulette ball.

How do you even process the insane mess that was last night's Sectionals episode of Glee? Maybe I should ask a bunch of questions about it to try to unravel the mysteries? Would you guys mind?

Michael Jackson's doctor Conrad Murray has been sentenced to four years in jail over the pop star's death. He'd been, inexplicably, administering the powerful anesthetic propofol to treat amnesia—like getting chemotherapy as a haircut, as Robin Williams said.

The Michael Jackson estate is reportedly in talks for the inevitable film about the life of the King of Pop. Ivan Reitman's Montecito Picture Company – which has brought us Old School and Up In The Air, but also EuroTrip and The Pink Panther – might produce. According to Variety, "The project would only cover certain periods of the late singer's life." So none of the gross stuff.

The Beverly Hills mansion where Michael Jackson took his last breath is up for sale. All of the spookily preserved pieces inside (including his death bed) are to be auctioned off next week.

Updated. After a tawdry trial featuring a clothed death photo, a naked death photo, and a slew of unbelievable sad documents illustrating the King of Pop's demise, physician Dr. Conrad Murray has been found guilty the involuntary manslaughter of Michael Jackson.

We wouldn't be surprised if Frankie—the impressively coordinated, dishwasher-loading young dancer seen here—now wants to ground his father until the end of time for revealing his Michael Jackson moves to the YouTubeniverse. At least that's how we would feel if our dad surreptitiously filmed us doing our "Smooth Criminal" routine (we don't actually have one).

Celebrity corpses everywhere are creaking with anticipation: Forbes' "Top-Earning Dead Celebrities" list is out!

Big news from the Michael Jackson manslaughter trial/snuff porn festival! Dr. Conrad Murray has abandoned his original defense, that Jacko "accidentally killed himself by self-administering Propofol." It's not clear what Murray's new defense will be.

That terrible bottom-feeding tabloid called the Los Angeles District Attorney is at it again: At the manslaughter trial of Dr. Conrad Murray today, prosecutors displayed a second Michael Jackson death photo, this time showing the King of Pop naked "at the time of autopsy." The photo is here, if you're so inclined. [Image via Getty]

Lindsay's collecting exotic objects. Paul McCartney feels like somebody's husband now. Arnold Schwarzenegger touches himself in public. Sunday gossip is dressed in a neon green bikini and matching high heels and posing awkwardly on the hood of a sports car.

Aniston assaulted a director, but she says he was asking for it. Fart fetishists can't get enough of Nancy Grace. Ashton Kutcher's mistresses poses topless. Demi Moore still wears her wedding ring. Friday gossip returns to the one who hurt it.

Naked hot tub ladies describe their tryst with Ashton Kutcher. Willow Smith collaborates with Nicki Minaj. Jennifer Aniston says there is "no desperation" in her life. Michelle Pfeiffer thinks plastic surgery is "sad." Thursday gossip kisses and tells.