In your evasive Thursday media column: the WSJ is becoming more like your little hometown paper, Mediaite doesn't justify itself to anyone, an alt-weekly judgment upheld, and Bill O'Reilly and Glenn Beck have a mystifying chat.

Jonathan Franzen is the first living novelist to grace Time magazine's cover in ten years. Halle Berry is the first black woman on Vogue's September cover since 1989 (and her over-40 peers are suddenly popular). Three possible explanations exist.

Are you an aspiring journalist desperately seeking employment to validate your perilous career choice? Good news: Newsday is hiring 34 reporters. Real jobs for real journalists! Working on Long Island is a small price to pay. [Romenesko]

In your wondrous Wednesday media column: a mobile phone-focused magazine launch, a J-school's magical new fee, Stefano Tonchi talks trash, a sluggish growth forecast, and Northeast recruiting explained.

Ten years ago, watching television was a fairly mainstream activity. That's changed. New statistics tell us that not one single person born in the past ten years has ever bothered to watch TV. Especially not Fox News.

The New York Post on "erecting a gay bar" near the Ground Zero Islamic center: "Good luck finding 72 virgins in this joint."

Former White House Social Secretary Desiree Rogers, who earned the enmity of Washington's worst people and resigned after two bozos crashed a White House party, has been named CEO of Johnson Publishing Company—owners of Jet and Ebony. [NYT]

Some high school kids in a Princeton summer journalism camp came to NYC to report a story about scofflaw cars and buses idling illegally on the city streets, damaging the environment. Caught red-handed: Conde "Fuck the Ozone Layer" Nast.

In your trendy Tuesday media column: another big name leaves Newsweek, ProPublica's employees are shockingly well-compensated, magazine trends examined, more freelance payment fuckery, and OK! is not OK!

Cartoons now feature more reporting than anything else on your newspaper's op-ed page.

Local DC newsman Doug McKelway's been suspended for "insubordination" after arguing with his boss about editorializing on air. The same Doug McKelway seen here ferociously refusing to apologize to a gay blogger he'd threatened to punch in the face? Yes.

In your muckraking Monday media column: MSNBC.com borrows a little too liberally from the NYT, the Washington Post grits its teeth as another competitor launches, Clark Hoyt gets a new job, more advice for Newsweek, and Forbes.com gets Gawkery.

"So has the decaying world of magazine publishing reached a point where all magazines are emulating Maxim and Playboy with sexy young women exposing themselves in order to attract consumers' attention?" Yes. Although that's not working, either. [Fox News, Mediaweek]

Like all magazines, New Scientist is desperate for any gimmick to attract slackjawed readers from our increasingly video game-addled society of functional illiterates. NS's idea: "neuro-marketing" to design an irresistible cover. The incontrovertible findings: human brains are quite dumb.

Rolling Stone's Michael Hastings is surprised the Army denied his latest embed request. Generous soul!

Here is amiable CBS Early Show host Harry Smith absolutely cutting the you-know-what out of his finger, with a vegetable slicer, on live TV this morning. You know he wanted to say "Fuck!" so bad.

In your contentious Friday media column: freelancers say BlackBook's not paying them, a family sues Metro for misleading photo usage, WaPoCo makes money (no thanks to the newspaper), and a bidder for Newsweek says he was ignored.

Two guys who have permits to carry concealed handguns in New York: Fox News evil toadish mastermind Roger Ailes, and American tough guy Sean Hannity. Why so scared, fellas? Ailes, at least, can blame his paranoid insanity.

Time magazine is a little embarrassed this morning, after Jack Shafer pointed out that Time ran "Can Animals Think?" stories in 1993, 1999, and this week. Psht. That's nothing compared to Newsweek's Historical Jesus coverage. Some things are always important.

Former Elle Decor editor Margaret Russell is the new editor-in-chief of Conde Nast's Architectural Digest.