Newspaper heiress/Page 6 Magazine contributor Lydia Hearst doesn't have a website that she's not paying the bills for. She writes us, "I wish I did not have to contact you, as I'm sure you will most-likely print this (but if you do, please respect me enough to keep my E-mail address private), but I'd like to clear something up. I do not own the site to which you are referring. I have never had an official web page, nor am I aware of who owns the site claiming to be my 'official' page. I do however have an official fan-page on Facebook. Say what you will, but please check your facts. Also, if you actually look at the page it is obvious that whoever owns it just typed those words across the screen. Have a lovely weekend. All the Best, Lydia"

What do you get when you challenge a cartoonist to draw 200 three-panel comics in twelve hours? Fun times! Artist Nedroid took up the challenge from Cracked and went batshit nutty. After the jump, some of my faves.

"This design concept jacket from Lunar Design aims to turn your torso and neck into a walking anthropomorphic digital display. The Blu Jacket would be made of flexible, organic e-paper: potential applications are displaying advertisements and broadcasting your mood, as well as more mischievous aims like virtual streaking." Bigger pic, and sad news, after the jump.

The fanatics at TheTVAddict.com have gotten their hands on a script for Caprica, the prequel spin-off of the Sci-Fi Channel's awesome Battlestar Galactica. "CAPRICA, set a mere fifty-one years prior to the planet's destruction portrays a far seedier version of modern day earth, essentially reading like an episode of HBO's THE WIRE. Like all Ronald D. Moore projects, the pilot is riddled with political intrigue, racial prejudice, [and] religious zealots."

How I Met Your Mother nice guy Josh Radnor: "Her head was thrown back, the arms were raised above the body as if in the last moments of her life the girl was desperately defending herself. A deep gash four inches long was in her right cheek. Her neck was cut from the lobe of the left ear to the center of the throat and there was another gaping wound in the right side of the neck."

Want to support pig-faced scumbag "Girls Gone Wild" producer Joe Francis, who recently got out of jail and is awaiting his trial on tax evasion charges? Then go buy your copy of Girls Gone Wild Magazine-it's hot off the presses and stinks of ammonia! "The magazine comes packaged with part one of the 'Hooker Gone Wild' DVD series, starring Eliot Spitzer's infamous call-girl, Ashley Dupré, as well as an additional full-length Girls Gone Wild DVD," the press release boasts.

You know all those media pundits who say it's no biggie that every time you call a helpline to complain about pretty much any product or service your call gets zapped to India where you get to talk in circles with a person who couldn't care less about your stupid American problems and thinks that calling you by your first name at the end of every sentence will cover up their condescending attitude? Well, they'll be changing their tune in a jiffy. "Local newspaper publisher Newsquest has told prepress staff at some of its titles that their jobs will be outsourced to India."

Reporters at News Corp.'s The Wall Street Journal had a story all written and ready to go on the ousting of managing editor Marcus Brauchli, but were forced by Journal higher-ups to sit on it, a source at the paper tells us. That decision resulted in the paper getting scooped on its own news. Granted, covering your own news organization is a tricky business, but you'd think Brauchli would have learned his lesson last year when he held back breaking news regarding News Corp. chair Rupert Murdoch's initial move to take over the paper, and got scooped on the news by CNBC, leading to an investigation.

Klutzy Adam Penenberg, in a boring story about personal privacy for Media Post, gives away a juicy tidbit about one of his former bosses at Forbes. The magazine decided against a probe into the chief executive of Kroll Associates, the private investigators, because of a fear that he might possess photographs of a high-ranking Forbes executive's mistress, and expose the relationship.

A new Bud Light ad campaign was blatantly stolen from a 1989 Rob Schneider stand-up routine. Crawling Madison Avenue bastards. How far do you think that European Gigolo money is gonna go? See the shocking thievery for yourself after the jump.

The Times is short of its goal of 100 staff buyouts, so 30 newsroom staff will likely be laid off in the next month. This would be "the company's first-ever mass firing of journalists in its 156-year history," according to Keith Kelly at the Post. But there's a chance that number could be reduced, since the Newspaper Guild has yet to obtain an official count - Kelly's number is based on his own inside sources. In any case, it looks like the cuts may very well fall on the feisty Metro desk, which has turbocharged the paper's internet presence and is probably the last place the paper should be cutting:

Jimmy Fallon's long-rumored takeover of NBC's Late Night is now officially going to happen and will be announced in the coming weeks, according to anonymously-sourced reports from Fox News, Variety, Hollywood Reporter and Reuters. Current Late Night host Conan O'Brien is expected to take over from Jay Leno next year following a six-month break, and Leno is being pushed out. On Saturday Night Live, Fallon was famous for fumbling his lines by cracking up, and was recently named one of the two least funny comedians in the country. He'll take some jeers when he starts, but the critics were brutally hard on O'Brien in his early days, as well. And Fallon's already practiced being a tough, take-no-guff talk show host, as his well-liked Barry Gibb character on SNL, shown in the video after the jump (complete with another insult to the dignity of Times columnist Thomas Friedman).

"The Grateful Dead, whose songs celebrated personal freedom, American idealism and mind-altering drugs, will donate a cache of their papers, posters and props on Thursday to the University of California, Santa Cruz, which plans to use the musical miscellany as part of a research center to be known as Dead Central." [Times]

Katie Couric hit rock bottom this month, starting with talk about an early exit from the CBS Evening News, continuing through to a lost debate-hosting opportunity and the worst ratings week in her show's history, and ending with Larry King's contract renewal for a show Couric had coveted at CNN. Now, at last, the news cycle seems to be turning in Couric's favor. Newsday reports Couric may be able to nab King's time slot:

A Russian nickel tycoon (seriously) is launching a magazine and television station called "Snob." "'It's for people who are successful and those who want to be successful,' said Andrei Shmarov, who will run Snob." Reuters filed this under "oddly enough" because they've apparently never glanced at an American magazine rack. All our glossies ought to be called Snob. Oh, the tycoon is spending $150 million to launch the mag so if you missed out on that Portfiolio job you can still cash in, if you're willing to relocate. [Reuters]

Drug-and-celebrity-laden downtown nightspot The Box can add to its ongoing problems the fact that an unknown disgruntled person is posting angry fliers around town alleging that the club's doorman is a "DRUG PEDDLER who RAPED TWO WOMEN" last year. The Daily News reported today that the anonymous flier guy has been arrested. But today the "BOX-KILLER" weighed in on the comments section of a blog post to declare that he was NOT arrested because posting such fliers is free speech, and furthermore, he still thinks the doorman is an "animal" and a "criminal!" Anonymous fliers and anonymously sourced gossip items and anonymous blog posts: all the makings of a solid story. [Animal]

The New York Times' big front page investigative story on Sunday about the tight connections between ex-military "analysts" on news programs and the Pentagon's PR machine was a solid re-affirmation of most people's suspicions that they, along with much of the media at large, were all play-acting in the inevitable march to war. The piece was hugely comprehensive, but it did lack the input of one man: incompetent superflack Ronn [sic] Torossian, head of the press-friendly agency 5WPR! Luckily, Ronn has chimed in with his advice to all of you who may have been upset by the story of undercover warmongering propaganda: chill. It's all just PR 101.

A restaurant owner in DC writes an essay about the experience of hosting the Pope's birthday party. He started planing the event six months in advance. He ordered a 12 square-foot cake in the shape of St. Peter's Square that was too beautiful to cut. He even flew to Italy just to get the plates made! The lunch menu included imported Puglia mozzarella, zucchini blossom truffle tagliolini, braised veal cheeks, and orange fallen truffle. Not mentioned: the tip. [WP]

Martin Gee is a designer at the San Jose Mercury News, which, like every other paper, has been gutted by budget cuts, layoffs, and buyouts recently. One night on a whim he took a camera and shot a series of photos inside the almost abandoned newsroom. They do an amazing job of capturing the junkyard aura of the place [PDN via Animal]. It's newsroom-as-battlefield, the day after. You can see his full set of photos here. Below, our five favorite shots.

Yesterday Page Six published a terrible rumor that there's a sex tape floating around featuring Jackass star Bam Margera and the fiancee of the radio personality "Opie," of "Opie and Anthony." Calling into question the sanctity of a radio shock jock's relationship, can you imagine? Now Opie has struck back at the "scumbags of the media" (that's you, Page Six!), offering $100,000 to anybody who can produce the alleged tape. You know what that means: Bam Margera is tearing his apartment upside down right this minute. Kidding! He sounds pretty sure he's on safe ground. After the jump, listen to Opie and Anthony excoriate those with even lower journalistic standards than themselves: