There are two "Black Panthers" standing outside of one polling location in Philadelphia. One of them has a billy club. It's kind of the most hilarious story ever. Fox is all over it. Below, raw live unedited footage of these two American Heroes, who just arrived from that Life on Mars show. Anyways! Race war, guys, let's all head to Ricky's and take advantage of these post-Haloween bargains on Manson Family costumes.
CNN is live on the scene today in the swing state of Pennsylvania, where people are very enthusiastic about getting to the polling places. They interviewed real live man-on-the-street "Ron Jones," who allows that he's so excited to vote that he's "been back a couple times." How could Matt Drudge allow this to happen? Click to watch the liberal media- African-American- ACORN- terrorist voter fraud revealed.
Has Rupert Murdoch made a terrible miscalculation? Michael Wolff thinks so! Wolff, Murdoch's newest biographer, says that the New York Post's uncharacteristically fawning Obama-centric cover today is Murdoch's way of apologizing to the future president (Obama) for the Post's endorsement of McCain. In fact, it's been widely rumored for months that Murdoch wanted the Post to endorse Obama. So what's going on here? Rupert Murdoch has always been canny about getting in good with those in power, even if they're from the party he opposes. He made nice with Tony Blair in the UK. And the Post did in fact endorse Obama over Hillary Clinton, once it was clear Obama would win. Besides that, Murdoch's pet paper the Sun in the UK pretty much deified Obama. And even Fox News managed to work out an Obama interview with Bill O'Reilly, when they weren't calling him "Osama" and such. So why didn't Rupert just get the Post to go ahead and endorse Obama in the general election? Two reason. One of those reasons is named "Sarah Palin." Murdoch flirted with her coyly, and ended up tentatively supporting her convoluted policy proposals in public. It may be that he fell in love with her personality (the same mistake McCain made), or just came to the conclusion that, dumb as she is, at least she wasn't likely to push for any more regulation of his business if she came into office when McCain keeled over. The second reason is more basic: a Post endorsement of Obama just wasn't practical. It would defeat the paper's very reason for existence, which is to be a rabid conservative voice in the midst of the liberal NYC media. So Rupert Murdoch just allowed them to endorse McCain, then set about sending every possible signal that he's willing to be friendly with Obama after he wins. Not that dumb after all.
♦ Election returns may set TV viewing records tonight, assuming there's some "suspense." [AP]
♦ What's been on cable news channels all day? Mindless talk and speculation, for the most part. [TV Decoder]
♦ It's possible the networks will call the election before the polls close. [THR]
♦ Some of the high-tech wizardry in store tonight: CNN plans to feature 3D "holographic images" of the network's remote correspondents in its New York studio. [WSJ]
♦ More trouble for tabloid kingpin David Pecker: John Miller, AMI's chief operating officer, has resigned. [NYP]
So this dumb conservative PAC finally, finally made the ad about Barack Obama's controversial preacher Jeremiah Wright that the McCain campaign didn't want to touch. Its very existence garnered plenty of media attention&dmash;and, of course, free airtime for the ad—but then the PAC had to actually put it on television. Instead of a targeted ad-buy in white swing areas, they just went national, sticking it on Sunday Night Football, last night's Saturday Night Live election special, and, uh, on the Rachel Maddow show? Clearly they didnt want to "influence the election" or anything with their little ad, they just wanted to annoy the hell out of Democrats while they're trying to watch their liberal shows.
Barack Obama did an interview with yesterday with Sway, MTV's official friendly ambassador from the land of hip hop. A viewer asked him about towns that try to pass laws banning baggy pants. First Obama said those laws are a "waste of time." But then he added, "brothers should pull up your pants!" Is Barack Obama a fashion icon, or your grumpy old dad—or is he both?!?! [UPDATE: Clip of the interview below!]:
There's a limited number of ways you can make "election day" a front page, above the fold headline. Because, you know, nothing will be "news" until tomorrow. So you can "report," as many papers do, that people will choose someone (YOU DECIDE, YOU CHOOSE, IT'S UP TO YOU), today, with a big splash featuring both candidates' headshots. You can try to make some actual "news," as the Times and the Wall Street Journal do with stories on how historic everything is and what the winner will inherit. You can report on all the boring campaigning of yesterday, or predict electoral chaos, or, as the New York Post admirably did, just pretend there isn't even an old white Republican in this race. The papers in the attached image chose almost exactly as you might predict. A couple papers across the world went a different direction.
Dan Rather won't be covering the election tonight for a major American network. The longtime CBS News anchor, who remains embroiled in a $70 million lawsuit against his former employer, signed with the French cable network Canal Plus a few weeks ago to provide election commentary to French television viewers. Supposedly he'll be on the air this evening to cover the returns and he'll return tomorrow to offer up some post-election analysis. (It's unclear how his "Ratherisms" will play with audiences on other side of the Atlantic.) But in the meantime, you can take a look at this clip which has been touting his arrival on French TV in recent days. It's in French, but the opening introduction is priceless: "In the United States, he's as well-known as Mickey [Mouse], as popular as Elvis."
On this election day, the cold-blooded monsters like us whose business is our nation's flow of public information are thinking not about political hope, but about hope for continued high ratings; not about political change, but about people changing the channels. (Speechwriter-ly!). What it comes down to is this: once this election's over, will the public still care about all these media outlets who've been living it up thanks to public interest in politics? Let's round up the media's nervous take on the media's future!
Corporate America is blundering around like a particularly drunk blind man in search of some marketing tactic that will grab the hearts and minds of the public during this nightmarish, never-ending economic turmoil. And now they think they may have found it: comforting images that remind you that, hey, friends, family, and a happy home are what's really important now, not material things. (**EXCEPT FOR OUR COMPANY'S PRODUCT, THX): Companies are bringing back their old classic jingles to remind you of a happier time, before mortgage payments and credit card debt and your whore wife sleeping with the fella who came to repair your A/C. "I am stuck on Band-Aid brand cause Band-Aid's stuck on me!" "I don't want to grow up, I'm a Toys 'R' Us kid." Poignant. Even IKEA is encouraging happy homes:
The TV news networks have very exciting plans tonight, beyond just calling the election nice and early so you can accelerate your drinking! MSNBC, for one, is poised to bring back its fun, bitchy insanity: Though Keith Olbermann and Chris Matthews were supposed to just be "analysts" on election night following their Democratic National Convention bickering, Matthews now says they'll be "hosts." Maybe Rachel Maddow, who has already taken Pat Buchanan in hand, is going to keep them in line. CNN will combat this combustible crew with an actual human transporter, like on Star Trek, reports the Wall Street Journal:
Network news divisions got skittish about calling presidential elections following their colossally terrible performance in 2000. In case you forgot, they all called Florida for Al Gore, then uncalled it, then called it for Bush (following in the trustworthy footsteps of Fox News!), then uncalled the whole election. Their newfound prudence was rewarded in 2004 when leaked exit polls said John Kerry had the whole thing in the bag (oops). But this year the TV guys have their swagger back. Here's a CBS News executive telling the Times why California can suck it:
We hear that the layoffs at Viacom are going to happen, but probably not tomorrow. Viacom just sent an internal email to employees telling them that the Holiday party is canceled—but everyone gets two extra days of vacation instead! To "relax and recharge for the coming year." That's pretty awesome. Unless you come back and get fired. Click through for the full memo.
There's so much bad news in the print media world these days that we just have to roll it all up for you in one convenient post that you can read here, on the internet, where we are responsible for killing print. Today in the Death Of Print Daily: Big layoffs at Rodale and the Seattle Times, the death of Out Traveler, and a tipster describes just how poor the Village Voice is these days:
Sumner Redstone was the first major media mogul to get slammed by the economic downturn, and the Viacom chief's troubles continue. His pending divorce and the comical failure of his video game business are mere distractions. His bigger problem is that his company has $1.6 billion in debt to deal with, and Redstone is squabbling with his daughter about how to do it. For some, it's already too late; we hear that layoffs are coming down at Viacom tomorrow. But for the Redstones, there seem to be only three real options:
Now is the time when campaign reporters file their last, wistful dispatches of this hellbound two-year horse race. There is an absolute mess of these things! They all serve to fill space on the final, news-free days of the campaign, and also to remind readers of the invaluable role that the true heroes—political reporters—play in our democracy. We've slogged through the morass of remembrances today in order to answer the meta-question that really matters: what did this campaign mean to the media? You have to remember that for a lot of reporters, today is the last gasp of glory. By the end of this week the campaign will be over, and there will be far fewer opportunities to go on TV and be "experts." There may also be far fewer opportunities to be, you know, reporters; some percentage of these people are bound to be laid off in the coming year. We already know that the LA Times will be laying off the bulk of its Washington bureau. And most ofl those plucky young embedded reporters from TV networks are preparing to be fired when this thing wraps up. Everybody wants to make sure that you know that they were on the inside. Just because you, the consumer, didn't get all the colorful anecdotes in your morning paper doesn't mean that they didn't happen. Reporters have all types of fun memories from the campaign that they would like to share with you now that the campaign is over! Most of these fall into two categories: the "God these candidates are more morally bankrupt than I could ever say outright in the pages of my tepid publication," and the (more popular) "I made friends with important people!" Some key examples of each: God these candidates are more morally bankrupt than I could ever say outright in the pages of my tepid publication Michael Scherer from Time went to some Republican retreat in Michigan where politicians "came there to speak to state party activists, serving up stump pomp while waiters in white-tie tuxedos served drunk diners with pecan-coated ice cream balls." Then he finds a regular lady who says everyone in town is not like that. He rejoices. HuffPo's Sam Stein was set upon by a gang of disgruntled Hillary supporters in a Washington bar. "And soon the denizens were letting me have a piece of their mind. 'HuffPost sucks! HuffPost sucks!' they chanted, as I bit into my now-arrived Reuben. 'Fox News, fair and balanced! Fox News, fair and balanced!'" Although he does not say so, he hates them. Marc Ambinder from the Atlantic recalls watching Obama's little daughter Sasha talking to her daddy on stage at the Democratic convention; it "was very cute, but it also revealed how staged even Obama’s campaign had become." The thought of a little girl talking to her dad now makes him want to absolutely vomit. Politics has ruined him. I made friends with important people! Wacky old Dana Milbank from the Washington Post remembers Mike Huckabee "taking reporters hunting, taking them jogging, taking them to the barber for a face massage and shave." Dana Milbank would not object to being asked to appear on Mike Huckabee's teevee show, if Mike Huckabee so chose. Ana Marie Cox from Time had fun singing karaoke with McCain campaign hacks Mark Salter and Steve Schmidt. Salter even sung Dylan tunes! Later they went back to figuring out how to oppress black people. Adam Nagourney from the Times liked nothing better than sharing his Christmas dinner with failed Hillary flack Howard Wolfson: "We were quick to discover that there aren't a lot of restaurants open in Des Moines on Christmas night (or bars, but that's another story). But what was open was sure to warm the heart of two displaced Jews from New York: A Chinese restaurant." Aw! Then they made passionate love. You see, just about everyone on the campaign trail goes a little crazy. It's classic Stockholm syndrome; trapped on buses and planes for months on end, reporters come to regard their captors as friends. Just to get a fact-free look back at the election season to fill a hole in its Week in Review section yesterday, the NYT had to turn to Frank Bruni, who's spent the entire campaign eating brains at Manhattan's finest restaurant. But they needed an outsider who could say about this godforsaken campaign, presumably with a straight face, "that we have, if anything, undervalued and even lost sight of its significance at times." Had they put Adam Nagourney on that story, the editors would have had to spend hours rewriting his knowing asides about Howard Wolfson's bewitching cologne. For the media, the campaign means life. It means purpose, and employment, and attention, and a sense of self-importance. It's an unparalleled opportunity to cast oneself as an expert with no qualifications whatsoever, and to profess to speak for millions of "real Americans" without any factual basis. In reality, campaign reporters have a far less objective view of the Presidential race than a fat, laid-off auto worker sitting on his ass playing XBox in the ugly part of Toledo. It takes a rare breed to remain sane during the ordeal. And we should salute those who do. So Joshua Green of the Atlantic, we salute you; you alone have found a moment that appropriately embodies American democracy:
Let's check in with famous and successful media critic Howard Kurtz of the Washington Post. What is Mr. Kurtz writing about today? The Monday after John McCain's much-discussed appearance on Saturday Night Live, his second of the general election campaign and coming just weeks after his running mate Sarah Palin's well-publicized cameo, Kurtz's column is, of course, about how Obama is on TV all the time, and all the television talk shows are In The Tank for Barack Obama.
A replacement has been named for Lydia Hearst, who stepped down as a Page Six magazine columnist last week after slamming her family's media empire (and then improbably accusing the mag's editors of fabricating the column). It's professional socializer Liam McMullan, the son of nightlife photog Patrick McMullan and Michael Musto's godson. [VV via Gawker]
Just because we're in the midst of the Great Magazine Die-Off and print media in general is having its worst month in the past 20 years is no reason to force editors into less-than-grand offices! We hear that Kent Brownridge, the new general manager of OK! magazine, is "having a wall removed" and combining two offices into a one big, bad, office for Kent Brownridge, at an estimated cost of $50K. "The old man is still obsessed with his old boss Jann Wenner and is insisting that his office at OK be bigger than Jann's office at Us Weekly," says our source. That, despite the fact that OK! is suffering like every other celebrity magazine. Regardless, the last thing anyone in the media wants to see is Kent Brownridge in a moderately-sized office. Carry on. [Feel free to email us, Kent!]
