1) Rory and Elie Tahari hosted a bash at their beachfront house for God's Love We Deliver: 400 guests including Simon Doonan (above center) and Jonathan Adler, Martha Stewart, Arnold Scaasi, Kelly Klein, Debbie Bancroft, Richard Mishaan, Tory Burch, Kyle MacLachlan (above left) and Desiree Gruber (above right), Olivia Chantecaille, Dennis Basso, Melissa Berkelhammer, Gigi Mortimer, Karen Pearl, and Tiffany Dubin raised $1.3 million by bidding on auction prizes including lunch with Blaine Trump and Joan Rivers at Le Cirque. [Hamptons.com/Dan's Hamptons]

· Do you mean to tell us that between the combined casts of The View and The Love Guru, no one has the balls or heart to break the news to the Whoopsters that Timberland is the producer outdoorswear company, Timberlake is the singer, and Timbaland is the producer? Ugh, never mind. We can't keep those three straight either. [The View]
·Mary Lynn Rajskub's prenatal cravings to put a .22 caliber bullet between your eyes are getting stronger than ever. [MySpace]
· First Joan Rivers is booted from British TV for throwing around a few colorful words, now Martha Stewart isn't even being allowed into the country. Last we checked, this was the nation ruled by Queen Elizabeth II, right? When did they suddenly lose their tolerance for a crusty old bag? [Yahoo]
· Non-SAG hamster needed. [Craigslist]
· Citibank filed suit against poor Ed McMahon, saying he owes then $180,000. That's in addition to the $750,000 he owes AmEx. This really has gone too far, and if no one else will do it, then we suppose that leaves it to us: Please join us for Live Ed, a weekend-long concert benefit outside Defamer HQ, including performances by Blinded by Thongs, and, um, well that's it so far. More confirmations as they come! [TMZ]

Martha Stewart has been refused entry to the UK. The media queen/convicted felon was apparently planning to travel to London to speak at the Royal Academy, but the British government denied her visa application. So we keep allowing Naomi Campbell into the U.S. despite the fact she beats every other American that comes into contact with her and you guys are going to play tough with Martha? There really is no justice in the world. [Telegraph]

The UK does not want Martha Stewart no matter how many lines of crockery she's designed for Wedgwood! The UK Border Agency has barred the felonious lifestyle queen from entering the country, presumably because of her criminal ways here in America. It's admirable consistency for the agency-famous star criminals must be kept out along with the common scum. But it may turn out to be a crippling blow for England's Toad-in-the-hole industry:

Now added: Earlier foreshadowing about the dark fate that awaited just-dumped Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia CEO Susan Lyne.

WASPy, blonde Martha Stewart doppelganger Susan Lyne has stepped down as chief executive of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia, and will be replaced by new co-CEOs Robin Marino and Wenda Harris Millard, the popular former Yahoo sales chief. As Gawker pointed out, the stock price is tanking, but Lyne did bring the company's books back to black after Stewart's obstruction-of-justice conviction. (Photo by AP/Mary Altaffer)

Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia, the domestic queen's massive publishing and television conglomerate, has just announced that its CEO, Susan Lyne, has (ahem) "stepped down." Replacing Lyne will be two co-CEOs—an equivocation that often signals that a company was not well prepared for an executive transition. Lyne came on as head of the company when Martha Stewart went to jail in 2004, and has presided over a big drop in MSLO's stock price. But while her departure may have been inevitable, it's not necessarily a productive move. The magazine industry is in an irreversible decline, and no number of firings will change that fact. Sorry!

Susan Lyne, who took over Martha Stuart Living Omnimedia when its namesake went on a five-month vacation to the clink, is stepping down after failing to revive the company's ailing stock price. The CEO job will now be shared by two women: Wenda Harris Millard, president of the media division, and Robin Marino, who heads merchandising, neither of whom, it has to be said, holds a candle to Lyne in the Martha-lookalike department. MSLO's press release on the shakeup after the jump.

Who knew Martha Stewart's personal blog was so controversial? The ex-con/TV personality turned intrepid blogger first posted photos of a garden party she attended last Friday, including photos with longtime friend and Westport neighbor, Paul Newman. But it wasn't until readers began noticing how frail Newman looked in the photos that news outlets latched on to the story as proof that Newman is dying of lung cancer, something he's always refused to confirm. Has Martha transitioned from domestic doyenne to gossip blogger? Could she be the next celeb-outting Perez Hilton? Sadly, it looks like the answer is no, at least judging from her most recent post put up today, which takes on the slightly less controversial topic of growing peonies on her farm.

Bad news for TV, print and radio: heavy-spending packaged goods advertisers, such as $300 million-a-month Procter & Gamble, don't want to make annual ad-planning commitments anymore. Due to rising fuel, food, and commodity costs, these advertisers only want to commit to spending quarter by quarter. "The planning cycle has changed," Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia president Wenda Harris Millard told Silicon Alley insider. "This is wreaking havoc on media company forecasting." What Millard meant, of course, is old-media forecasting. Other than maybe Yahoo, AOL and MSN, Web companies aren't used to the luxury of sending customer invoices a year ahead of time.

Martha Stewart continues to demonstrate her flair for attracting the authorities. This past holiday weekend she and her billionaire boy toy, Charles Simonyi, were taking a spin in Skylands II, her boat, off the coast of the domestic doyenne's getaway property in Seal Harbor, Maine. A few minutes into the excursion, the Coast Guard showed up for a spot inspection of the vessel! It no doubt triggered painful flashbacks of raids of yore for Martha, but all in all it was a pretty innocuous affair: Stewart's boat was forced to dock, a few guys from the U.S. Coast Guard made sure the safety equipment and whatnot was up to code, and then the Stewart-Simonyi loveboat was allowed back on its way. If anything, Martha actually seemed to take pleasure in the USCG's boarding of her pleasure craft—she pruriently notes that the Coast Guard dudes were "handsome" and "strong."

CARLSBAD, CA — Who are those cool cats in sunglasses at D6? Why, it's Jim Breyer of Accel Partners, a board member at Facebook, lunching with Wendi Murdoch, wife of the News Corp. CEO and chairwoman of MySpace China. Also at the table: Martha Stewart, seen here to the left; Vinod Khosla of Khosla Ventures; and Anne Wojcicki of 23andMe.

TV homemaker and ex-con Martha Stewart met lots of equally famous people at the White House Correspondents' Association dinner, the highlight of the DC social calendar, and she has the photos. Cambodia-bomber Henry Kissinger is always "jovial and friendly," apparently.

The 233-foot yacht owned by Charles Simonyi, the Microsoft billionaire and Martha Stewart love-muffin, has been spotted in the Hudson River. For a sense of scale, the helicopter, painted to match, can be clearly seen perched on the helipad. (True story: the only time I've flown in a helicopter, Simonyi was the pilot). I'm sure that with Stewart's help, the whole thing is quite tastefully decorated — if only to remove the stank of the Danish girlfriend whose pet name for Simonyi was "skat." That's also the name of the yacht, according to Wikipedia. (Photo by Eric Etheridge)

Who would have guessed that Martha Stewart's late dog Paws would look like this? We had her pegged as more of a Labrador person. But her doggie died, and she's grieving via a photoessay on her blog. It's a truly stark portrait of grief and the saddest thing ever.

Not that we're merchants of gloom, the latest figures for magazine advertising are dismal. Tallies of the number of pages carrying advertising in the first quarter, an early indicator of publishing woes, are down by double-digit percentages at news weeklies such as Time and business magazines such as Business Week. The only surprise is that Keith Kelly, who published the figures in today's Post, didn't tweak Mort Zuckerman, proprietor of a rival tabloid. Zuckerman's pet news magazine, US News & World Report, fell 37.5%. One perky spot: Martha Stewart's Everyday Food, now the last best hope of the magazine industry, as well as frustrated cookie-bakers.

Erotica writer and editor Rachel Kramer Bussel, formerly of the Village Voice, has a cupcake blog, which recently landed her on Martha Stewart's TV show. The recent editor of bondage compilations "Yes, Sir" and "Yes, Ma'am" never explicitly discussed sex on the domestic diva's prim broadcast, and it would probably be childish to read too much into the fact that Bussel's favorite cupcake is "from Kumquat Cupcakery, it's really salty," or that her co-blogger likes to share her own, spicy-but-subtle cupcake with friends, or that everyone ends up eating Martha's cupcake at her insistence. So just enjoy the completely innocent video of cupcake talk after the jump.

Etsy and Kalin just closed a $27 million funding round on January 31 and it's unlikely investors would be ready to flip so soon — especially considering that two Etsy investors, Flickr cofounder Caterina Fake and delicious founder Josh Schachter, were burned selling to Yahoo months too soon. "I don't think either would say "Oh, flipping to Yahoo when i did was awesome!," a source familiar with their thinking tells us.

We've quite enjoyed Macy's new marketing campaign in which they put together their design "stars" in fast-paced montages jam-packed with one-liners from the likes of The Donald, Martha Stewart and Jessica Simpson, who's fully come to terms with her dumb blonde schtick by agreeing to pretend she just can't figure out how to open the darn door to Macy's while schlepping boxes of her stripper shoes. But the latest spot has us confused. Featuring Mariah Carey (she has a fragrance, unlike any other celebrity we know!), Carlos Santana (highly respected shoe designer and sometimes musician!), Donald and Martha, the commercial's theme appears to be the way in which consumer goods can inspire...quasi-rhythmical snippets on Santana's legendary guitar?

After gleefully watching along as Martha Stewart doused Conan O'Brien with all sorts of lush-inducing cocktails, from Guinness to gin to mystery concoctions, we put on our thinking caps and sorted through our clip-clustered memories. After we cleared the cobwebs a bit, we remembered that this wasn't the first time Martha shared her love of liquor with television hosts. Loyal Defamer readers will recall her 8am rise-and-shine mixers with Meredith Vieira on The Today Show last month, and insomniacs will certainly remember her booze-on-the-brain appearance on The Late Show last week (in which she listed at least four indecipherable drinks she calls her "favorites"). But her fondness of ladylike cocktails doesn't stop there. Intrepid Defamer Videographer™ Molly McAleer put together a burp-filled mashup of our favorite Professional Housewife's alcohol-drenched appearances of late; as always, video is available the jump.