Fortune magazine staff writer Barney Gimbel has reportedly quit amid charges he ripped off entire sections of a New York Times Magazine article, in a plagiarism job a college freshman would be ashamed of.

In your funereal Thursday media column: the Rocky Mountain News is dead, we'll all see more dead soldiers, the New York Times is dying slowly [UPDATED: ad layoffs], and Tribune is dying quickly:

• Jerry Seinfeld has a new project in the works for NBC. The Marriage Ref will feature celebs "judging couples in the midst of marital disputes." [THR]
• The Times is scaling back the number of issues it publishes of T. [NYP]
• The Gray Lady does say it has enough cash to last through '09, though. [E&P]
• Denver's Rocky Mountain News is shutting down on Friday. [AP]
• Fox has renewed The Simpsons for two more seasons. [Variety]
• ABC collected $72 million for the 26 minutes of ad time it sold during the Oscars. Overall, ad spending fell by 10 percent this year, though. [TVW, NYT]
• Doubledown Media, which ceased operations recently, is bankrupt. [MM]
• You can now download CBS shows to your iPhone. Enjoy. [NYT]

Self-promoting cad Neal Boulton's editorship of gay magazine Genre is a touchy subject. But you can stop asking how much he likes men, because Boulton's on to bigger, more "pansexual" things.

In your chunky Wednesday media column: awful bad terrible newspaper news (and suggestions!), Hallmark dies politely, Rupert Murdoch's deadly newspaper addiction may be getting worse, and much more!

Condé Nast is "having the worst year of any publisher," or so a "rival executive" tells Keith Kelly today. The facts pretty much speak for themselves, though: While there's been a 24 percent drop-off in ad pages industry-wide, the Joanne Lipman-edited trainwreck otherwise known as Portfolio is down 60 percent, and Wired has seen its ad pages plummet 57 percent. Any good news? Why, yes, there most certainly is. Golf World is doing quite nicely these days, you'll be happy to hear. [NYP]

In the magazine industry, Condé Nast has suffered the most this year. And within Condé Nast, Portfolio is at absolute rock bottom. It's getting damned hard to see how the magazine survives.

In your crazyland Tuesday media column: PR wizardry at the bankrupt Philly papers, Starbucks sliding down the publishing D-list, the perils of journalism in Utah, and Getty says you owe it money:

In your chesty Monday media column: the Oxford American lives, the Journal Register goes broke, Geraldo is trespassing, and Madoff pics are hottttt:

Have you read the controversial New Yorker profile of Rahm Emanuel? It's controversial because it uses that word, in describing Rahm, a bunch of times, and also it pissed off some liberals.

A few months ago, Vanity Fair editor Graydon Carter announced that he planned to dial down the magazine's legendarily lavish, celeb-studded Oscar party for 2009. "The party will be a much more intimate affair than in years past; we're going to scale back the guest list considerably," Carter proclaimed, adding that it would be "a cozier, more understated event," and would have "familiar decor," since the magazine would be "recycling" many of the "elements of years past." Carter was certainly communicating the right message given the gloomy economy. But we hear Graydon's claims of recessionary modesty have been greatly exaggerated.

In your downward Friday media column: rumored layoffs at Playboy and Hearst, two-paper towns are dying, your favorite crappy TV channels revealed, and more!

• Project Runway filmed its season finale under the tent in Bryant Park today. When—and if—you'll ever get to see it remains up in the air. [NYT]
• It's predicted the broadcast of the Academy Awards on Sunday will be among the lowest-rated Oscars on record. [AdAge]
• The Post has apologized for its chimp cartoon the other day. [E&P]
• The New York Times Co. has slashed its dividend to zero. [NYP]
• New York and AMI are joining Hachette Filipacchi and dropping out of the Magazine Publishers of America. [NYP]

If you ran a magazine (maybe you do!), what would you consider a reasonable salary for the head of your little magazine industry trade group? 'Click through' and find out the real, ridiculous answer!

In your informative Thursday media column: Wired's publisher is out, John Updike's death begets a new book, NYP employees are pissed, and good and bad ideas for newspapers:

• CBS reports that profits plunged 52 percent last quarter. [Variety]
• The editor of the Post is defending the chimp cartoon in yesterday's paper; meanwhile, Al Sharpton led a protest outside News Corp. today. [E&P, WCBS]
• Despite the horrible reviews, the second-season premiere of Bravo's Real Housewives of New York City on Tuesday set a high for the series. [THR]
• Chris Mitchell has been named the publisher of Conde Nast Traveler. [MW]
• Conan O'Brien will conclude his 16-year Late Night run on Friday. Then it's off to LA to take over for Jay Leno as host of the Tonight Show. [NYT]

In your gloomy Wednesday media column: More rumored Viacom layoffs today, Newsweek staffers are mad at the boss, Playboy might have to sell Playboy, and more!:

• Arthur Gregg Sulzberger, the son of New York Times publisher Arthur Sulzberger Jr., is joining the paper next week as a Metro reporter. [NYO]
• Following a huge fourth quarter loss, Playboy says it's now up for sale. [Folio]
• It's rumored that Viacom is laying off staff today. [Gawker]
• Newsweek staffers are unhappy about recent changes at the mag. [NYP]
• Sean Delonas is in hot water for his cartoon in the Post today. [E&P]
• Mort Zuckerman says he can fix the Daily News by printing it in color. [MM]
• Vanity Fair is shutting down its German edition. [WWD]

In your bracing Tuesday media column: rumors of Newsweek closing a bureau [UPDATE: or maybe more than one], Barbara Walters tells the truth, questions are wrestled with, and Flex sells:

• Ad pages for monthly magazines in March dropped by 26 percent. [Crains]
• Sirius XM has reached a deal with Liberty Media to avoid bankruptcy. [NYT]
• What Bristol Palin had to say in her interview with Greta Van Susteren. [ABC]
• Not surprisingly, local news stations covered A-Rod's press conference today in lieu of President Obama's signing of the stimulus bill. [THR]
• A look at Politico and "the brave new world of post-print journalism." [TNR]
• Barbara Walters at a breakfast this morning with 60 Minutes's Steve Kroft and Ken Auletta: "I think the only programs that will still be there as they are now in 10 years are the morning shows." How convenient. [Portfolio]
• Thanks to the popularity of Slumdog Millionaire, ABC is thinking about reviving Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? during primetime. [NYT]