Jay-Z and Beyoncé lounging aboard a yacht off St. Barts ... Lindsay Lohan hanging out on the beach in Miami ... Adrian Grenier swimming with dolphins in Australia ... Eddie Murphy strumming the guitar off the coast of St. Barts ... Gerard Butler out on the town in South Beach ... and Paris Hilton on Bondi Beach in Australia.
• People won the bidding war for photos of Bristol Palin's baby, Tripp, and could be paying as much as $300,000 as part of the deal. [MSNBC]
• Mia Farrow's adopted daughter Lark died on Christmas Day. [NYDN]
• Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer spent Christmas on separate coasts, which obviously means their relationship is on the rocks. [Daily Mail]
• According to the always-reliable National Enquirer, Regis Philbin is refusing to help out his son Daniel financially, even though he's a double amputee and ekes out a living selling crafts. [NE]
• Disgraced billionaire Henry Samueli is dumping his jet to raise cash. [P6]
• The economic meltdown doesn't seem to be affecting the champagne-swilling partygoers on St. Barts this season, you'll be relieved to hear. [P6]
• Jennifer Aniston's secret to looking so good on the cover of GQ? Photoshop, of course. [NYDN]
• In his new book, Donny Deutsch recommends people stay faithful to their spouses, which is a little bit ironic considering he was involved in the breakup of a marriage just weeks ago. [P6]
• Tom Brady proposed to Gisele Bundchen on Christmas Eve. [TMZ]
• Lindsay Lohan says she may have a half-sister, although her father is denying it. [People]
• Michael Moore is trying to lose weight, you'll be happy to hear. [P6]
• John Costelloe, the actor who played "Johnny Cakes" on The Sopranos, has been found dead in an apparent suicide. [People]
• Paris Hilton says the heist at her LA home was an inside job. [NYDN]
• Eartha Kitt died on Christmas Day at the age of 81. [Us]
• Was the "exhaustion" that sent Samantha Ronson to the hospital the result of a marathon screaming match with Lindsay? [TMZ]
• Walter Noel's five daughters are a bunch of maneaters who used to steal other girls' boyfriends, at least according to one of their former Georgetown classmates. [P6]
• Now that he's dated half the blondes in New York, Lance Armstrong says he's having a baby with his girlfriend, Anna Hansen. [NYDN, PM]
• Star Jones has supposedly gained 30 lbs. recently and is now worried her boyfriend, chef Herb Wilson, is going to dump her because of it. [NE]
Jeremy Piven can't make any more curtain calls because he was poisoned with (ahem) "mercury," people are assualting Bernie Madoff's broker now and tender meat reuintes J.Lo and Mark Anthony.
• Is Jennifer Lopez getting ready to say goodbye to Marc Anthony? She neglected to wear her wedding ring to a premiere last week, which obviously means her marriage is now "at a breaking point." [Us, The Sun]
• Jeremy Piven is heading home. Just two months after arriving on Broadway (and after showing up late to performances and skipping matinees), he says he now plans to return to LA because he's suffering from some sort of "mysterious mercury ailment." [NYP]
• Good news for anyone going to the inauguration: Alec Baldwin says he plans to stay home and watch it on TV. [MSNBC]
• Donny Deutsch has been caught fooling around with a married woman. Or at least that's what hedge fund manager Andrew Sandler claims, who hired a private detective to follow his wife Lisa around and eventually scored pics of the two of them making out. [P6]
• Jennifer Aniston appears naked on the cover of the new GQ, and in the accompanying article she says her relationship with Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie is like an "insane Bermuda Triangle." Meanwhile, Brad admits to the new Rolling Stone that he fell in love with Angie while he was still married to Jen. [NYP, Daily Mail]
• Rachel Zoe's rep says the only reason she's been looking so thin lately is because she "just got over the stomach flu." Right. [OK!]
♦ Haven't seen Giuseppe Cipriani around town lately? There may be a reason for that: He's believed to be outside the U.S. since he's on probation and because Andrew Cuomo is investigating how the family managed to keep its liquor license earlier this year. [P6]
♦ Angelina Jolie has been undergoing secret fertility treatments in the hopes of becoming pregnant with twins within the next two years. At least that's what Star says. [Star]
♦ Everyone on Gossip Girl may be hooking up with each other, but at least one relationship isn't going so strong: Blake Lively was spotted making out with a guy who was not Penn Badgley. [E!, P6]
♦ Leonardo DiCaprio lost his wallet at Rolf's on Third Avenue, and Tom Cruise lost his Blackberry somewhere in Toronto. [P6, P6]
Maggie Gyllenhaal shopping in the West Village ... Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson saying goodbye to Charlotte Ronson outside the Bowery Hotel ... Gisele Bundchen leaving lunch at Extra Virgin on West 4th Street ... Naomi Watts with a friend outside Think Coffee on the Bowery ... Joan Cusack crossing the street ... Katie Holmes leaving her Village apartment, and later shopping with Suri at FAO Schwartz ... Robert Buckley walking in the East Village ... Ed Westwick and Jessica Szohr heading to the Gossip Girl holiday party at Haven on East 51st ... Victoria Beckham leaving the Donna Karan store in the meatpacking district, and later heading to dinner at Nobu.
♦ Mary-Kate Olsen was "acting very oddly" during her stay in Miami for Art Basel. After getting into a fight with Kirsten Dunst at a party at the Delano on Wednesday night, MK—who "looked like she had not brushed her hair in a week"—spent the weekend drinking, chain-smoking, and hanging out with boyfriend Nate Lowman, which means she's probably not pregnant. [P6, P6]
♦ Lindsay Lohan went to a party for Milk without Samantha Ronson last week, where she was spotted nuzzling with Sean Penn. [Fox 411]
♦ Amy Winehouse's husband Blake Fielder-Civil is reportedly threatening to write a tell-all book about Winehouse unless she gives him $1.7 million in the divorce settlement. [NYP]
Not but an hour ago, we solicited your classy-lite New York memories photos, to help us get through these worrisome times. Well if that's just a little too thinky of a Yearbook project for you, here are two photos of lesbian deejay Samantha Ronson (she dates a former actress named Lindsay Lohan) back when she was in high school. A little videogame playing nerdette! Who hugged boys. And... oh pish. It's a Friday. Peep away at a larger version of the above pic, and at another snap, after the jump.
Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson walking into the Beatrice Inn ... Liev Schreiber leaving his apartment with a duffel bag ... America Ferrera and Becki Newton crossing the street on the set of Ugly Betty ... Sarah Jessica Parker sticking out her tongue while walking in the West Village ... Katie Holmes holding Suri while getting out of an SUV ... Adrian Grenier playing guitar with his band, The Honey Brothers ... and Shania Twain arriving at JFK.
♦ Hockey star/former Vogue intern Sean Avery was suspended from the NHL indefinitely yesterday following "inappropriate public comments" about ex-girlfriend Elisha Cuthbert. "It's become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds," he said referring to Cuthbert's relationship with fellow hockey player Dion Phaneuf. [NYP]
♦ Britney Spears celebrated her birthday and album release yesterday by lip-synching her way through a performance on GMA and then heading off to Tenjune, where she partied with the likes of Heidi Klum and Lance Bass. The comeback may be short-lived: She's still abusing prescription drugs and is "plagued by insomnia and shaking fits," at least according to the Star. [The Sun, ThisIsLondon, Star]
♦ Blake Fielder-Civil, Amy Winehouse's estranged husband, just got out of prison. But now it looks like a return trip is in store. [Mirror, Daily Mail]
Though she's had limited success retaining acting jobs or remarking about our nation's first "colored" president, it's comforting to know that Lindsay Lohan still has one thing left she can excel at: penning Myspace blogs. Still, even Lohan is aware that Myspace is so 2006, and thus, she's attempted to join the mass migration to Facebook. Sadly, Facebook promptly deleted her account, prompting Lohan to flee back to Myspace for an anti-Facebook rant (which, like any anti-Facebook rant, would not be complete without a complaint about the site's new redesign):
Are you a horrible camera flash-stained, fraying-at-the-edges tabloid media darling who mourns the loss of the recent American rococo decade? Is everyone being poor and complaining all the time just too much for you? Well worry not, dear inexplicably financed friend, because Dubai is waiting for you! Oh you know about crazy Dubai, don't you? Unlike this ailing and needy nation, the Arab Emirate is flush with sandy money and crazy man-made islands and, ooo, brand-new gaudy hotels! Like a beacon or a lighthouse calling to them out of the icky dark, American celebrities who had it better when the world was gold showed up in droves for the huge, $20 million dollar opening gala for the new Atlantis Palms megaresort in Dubai this week. Look who was there partying while we back here in the home country hopped boxcars and ate cold soup thickened with sawdust: Cocaine-snazzled actress Lindsay Lohan, who is now a gay person dating a gay woman who deejayed at the bash. Odious "actress" and model Mischa Barton (who, OK, was born in England, but she made her money here). Tax-dodging half-vampire Wesley Snipes. Too-bored-to-ever-know-where-she-is fashion plate Mary Kate Olsen. I guess things here in the patriotic old US of A got a bit too messy for them, a bit too elbow-greasy. So they flit on over to some twirling, towering desert city of steel and glass where the champagne still flows and the hotels are tacky and people still have the energy to celebrate it all. Fair-weather Americans if you ask me. While the country burns—literally and figuratively—these folks spent how much on dresses (and, um, banana-yellow suits in the case of Mr. Snipes), to go fete it up in the Middle East and had the audacity to smile?? Well I hope they like it over there in Terrorist Disney World, because they aren't allowed back here. All images via Getty
