kids-these-days

Elementary School Launches Toy Gun Buyback Program

Neetzan Zimmerman · 06/10/13 09:51AM

The principal of an elementary school in the San Francisco Bay Area offered students a chance to trade in their toy guns for a book and a chance to win a bike as part of the school's first toy gun "buyback" program.

Computer Zombie Parents Unconcerned About Computer Zombie Children

Hamilton Nolan · 06/04/13 01:57PM

In the olden days, it was common for mothers to say things such as, "Stop watching all that TV! Go read a book! Bah on Herbert Hoover!" Today's parents, though, could not care less about the fact that their zombie children are being raised exclusively by internet pornography websites, like this one.

Don't Ask, Don't Tell, Faggot: Inside Marine Corps Boot Camp

Hamilton Nolan · 05/21/13 12:08PM

What is Marine Corps boot camp really like? According to an email that a current recruit sent to a bunch of his friends, it's a lot of being called a "faggot" by your drill instructors. And, if you happen to be brown-skinned, a lot of being called "terrorist." Not to mention "beast mode" workouts.

12-Year-Old Model Citizen Calls Out Cop for Parking Illegally

Neetzan Zimmerman · 05/06/13 10:29AM

Jeremy is just your average 12-year-old: He loves kicking it with his friends, eating Totino's pizza rolls after school, and watching whatever it is the kids are watching these days on that there picture box.