Prince William and his fiancee Kate Middleton won't have any butlers or servants (other than bodyguards) after they get married. Isn't that sweet. They're just like us! Except I have a cleaning lady. That makes me fancier than Prince William!

Miley and Noah do a Christmas karaoke duet. Rachel Weisz and Daniel Craig hold hands. Where did Selena Gomez's promise ring go? Prince sees The Nutcracker. Monday gossip is full of Christmas leftovers.

Nice guy Diddy is buying a model some new hair. Lil Wayne will do anything for love. Prince William and Kate Middleton spent Christmas apart. Does Courtney Cox really want David Arquette back? Post-Christmas Gossip Roundup is feeling generous.

Royal wedding mania is reaching a fever pitch, with Britain's Royal Mint yesterday unveiling its new gold coin to commemorate the engagement of Prince William and Kate Middleton. Too bad Kate's "likeness" looks nothing like her. Nice try, though!

Ashton Kutcher's maybe-mistress milks her 15 minutes. The Baldwin family Christmas will be argumentative. "Taylor Momsen offends Scottish crowd," but not for the reason you think. Tuesday gossip will soon be naked.

A book about Prince William claims he once yelled this at Kate: "Do you know who I am! No one tells me what to do. I do what I want." As the future King of England, he has a point.

Prince William and Kate get cuddly. Nicole Richie gets married, elephant in tow. Miley Cyrus soldiers on despite bong-ripping controversy, and Madonna is banned from TV. Sunday gossip round up is a blizzard of titillating details

Christina Hendricks' Christmas tradition is destined for raunchy jokes. Chelsea Handler called Angelina the c-word. Michelle Williams gained 15 pounds for a role, and reveals her un-diet secrets. (Ice cream.) Monday gossip slips a sable under the tree.

Justin Bieber toys with the outward indicators of sexual maturity. Jermaine Jackson owes $100,000 in child support. Lady says she didn't boink Eva Longoria's husband. Aretha Franklin goes under the knife. TGIFriday gossip.

Barbara Walters' annual televised celebrity kiss fest, "Most Fascinating People," has anointed this year's chosen ones. As tends to be the case with objects of popular fascination, most of them are scourges of the earth. Let us rate Babs' choices.

The man just can't go a day without saying something annoying. Also today: You actually might get invited to the Wedding of the Century, Kim Kardashian is totally doing things, and an in-depth analysis of the Bristol Palin affair.

It's true. We know where and when the amazing ceremony will be. Will you be invited?? Sit by your mailbox and wait! Also today: Miley Cyrus dares to be a teenager, Sandra Bullock is accosted, and Bristol Palin news.

Jaded old London Bishop Peter Broadbent isn't happy about the upcoming marriage between "shallow celebrities" Prince William and Kate Middleton, writing on Facebook, "I give the marriage seven years." Ouch! Broadbent will be spending the big day in France, FYI.

Biological terrorism strikes dancing-based reality show! Lindsay Lohan's loses her last best chance at saving her career. The cabin where Prince William proposed to Kate Middleton: Revealed! Sexiest man alive news! Saturday Gossip Roundup is protecting the homeland.

Costume jewelry designer Kenneth Jay Lane has created the "Princess Simulated Sapphire Ring" for QVC and they're on sale today! They're made in China and come with a limited warranty. Feel like royalty for just $39.54 (plus shipping). [NYM]

British Prime Minister David Cameron says he may declare Prince William's impending wedding day a national holiday. Prince Charles and Princess Di had one declared for their nuptials 30 years ago. Monarchy doesn't look so bad now, does it?

Katy Perry's management forces Vh1 to redo the photoshopping of her boobs. Eva Longoria divorced her husband over romantic text messages, possibly to his teammate's wife. Dina Lohan wants to sue Glee. Thursday gossip isn't ready for its close-up.

[After announcing her engagement to Prince William, Kate Middleton showed off her engagement ring today, which used to belong to William's mother, Princess Diana. We hope it's not haunted. Image via Getty]

Hours after Prince William announced his engagement, England's "heritage souvenir" industry has flown into action. Commemorative royal wedding magazines! Royal wedding t-shirts! Royal wedding thimbles! A guide to the souvenirs already available, plus a few suggestions of our own, below.

Like a pair of fine steeds, two humans of noble lineage and handsome hindquarters have come together for mating and merriment. Prince William is engaged to Kate Middleton! The wedding is expected to be even bigger than Charles and Diana's.