Kate Gosselin is the caretaker of eight children of her body's own wondrous making, but more than that, she is the adversary of eight children. This much was clear when she and her two oldest daughters, Mady and Cara, sparred on live television earlier this year, and when she ominously offered "one last redemption" to Mady in the preview to the two-part special Kate Plus 8: The Septuplets Turn 10. That special is the first Gosselin footage to run on TLC in almost three years, since Kate Plus 8 was canceled. It aired last night, and oh my god, this woman hates her children.

In the wake of an exuberant Today appearance, Kate Gosselin plus eight Gosselins are careening back to television next month, for a two-hour TLC special that answers the question: what would Game of Thrones look like if you preserved the exhausting parade of complex, acrimonious power struggles, but made two-thirds of the participants 10-year-olds? Also, what if it were set against the backdrop of the scenic Keystone state?

...with a Kate Gosselin-circa-2009 haircut?

Career mother Kate Gosselin has just filed what is believed to be a multi-million dollar lawsuit against her former co-star, business partner, and roommate (and husband) Jon Gosselin, accusing him of hacking, computer fraud, wiretapping, identity theft, and invasion of privacy.

Barbs are flying in the high stakes world of online coupon blogging after professional baby-haver Kate Gosselin was fired yesterday from her job ghostwriting blog posts about saving money sometimes.

Just like everything else about her nuptials, it seems like Kim Kardashian jumped the gun ordering her holiday cards with her wedding photo on them. Kristen Wiig is hanging out in her undies. Katy Perry is not pregnant. Paz de la Huerta ruined the ending of Boardwalk Empire. Tuesday's gossip has been known to make mistakes.

Lindsay Lohan's jail sentence is delayed. Kim Kardashian flees Australia. Kate Gosselin gets a job clipping coupons. Stanley Tucci marries Emily Blunt's sister. Thursday gossip procrastinates nude.

Ashton and Demi face divorce and cheating rumors, while their "other woman" prepares for a payday. Jessica Simpson takes 10 pregnancy tests and considers postponing her wedding. Holly Madison insures her boobs for $1 million. Thursday gossip surveys the wreckage.

J.Lo's love life takes a turn for the strange. (Or PR-planted.) Lindsay Lohan causes a fashion week near-riot. Clooney goes public with his female wrestler girlfriend. Terrence Howard's murderous voice message. Monday gossip manipulates the public.

Simon Cowell fondly recalls a successful date with "wacko" Denise Richards. Did Lady Gaga hook up with a tween idol? Madonna defends her right to hate hydrangeas. What did Ali Lohan do to her face? Thursday gossip has questions.

On yesterday's penultimate episode of Kate Plus 8, America's favorite child exploitation expert took all her kids (plus a babysitter and her bodyguard/boyfriend) on a road trip. Fun! But then the children dared to actually eat the pizza they were given, leaving none for the salad-phobic bodyfriend, and Kate went even more ballistic than she did while camping with Sarah Palin. So crazy, in fact, that Anderson Cooper spent a segment on tonight's AC360 dissecting just how horrible a person Kate Gosselin really is.

Lindsay "thinks Paris is the coolest person on the planet," and wants to seduce her. Salma Hayek promises to spoil her daughter. Jay-Z tips $50,000. Tara Reid's mysterious marriage explained. Tuesday gossip yearns.

Our long national nightmare is over. TLC has canceled Kate Gosselin reality show Kate Plus 8, though the network "hopes to check in with Kate and the family periodically with specials in the future." (Hopefully no sooner than when the kids start getting married.) Since ex-husband Jon Gosselin now toils in blue collar obscurity, it seems we may finally rid ourselves of the cautionary tale and exponentially multiplying menace that is the Gosselin clan.

Brad is afraid Angie will stab him in his sleep. Kelly Rowland has a double nip slip. Kate Gosselin lures a man with cupcakes, and fails. Jennifer Lopez wears four pairs of Spanx at once. Tuesday gossip draws shallow breaths.

A shocked nation recoils as Christina Aguilera dares show her face with anything less than professional hair and makeup. Victoria Beckham gets a "quinny buzz." Benjamin Millepied throws a tantrum. Monday gossip has fascist beauty standards.

January Jones bitches about bitches. Kate Gosselin's marriage counselor is suing her. Paz de la Huerta bounces back from beating up a reality star. JWoww wants to have babies. TGIFriday gossip.

Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens are back together. Alec Baldwin is a narcissist. Camille Grammer has some nudes. Lindsay Lohan is charitable. Want to see inside Justin Bieber's bedroom? Sunday Gossip Round Up is here.

On tonight's Factor, Bill O'Reilly welcomed Sarah Palin on for a chat about, well, a bunch of random, unintelligible things. But part of that chat included Palin defending her reality show—and Kate Gosselin's horrible behavior on it. Kinda.

On her reality show last night, Sarah Palin went camping with Kate Gosselin and brood. What did we learn? Gosselin is the only person in the world who makes Palin look level-headed and tolerable. Watch her completely freak out, inside.

Spoiler alert: December 12th's episode of Sarah Palin's Alaska will feature the Palins preparing Kate Plus Eight to go c̶a̶m̶p̶i̶n̶g̶ shoot rifles. Yes, guns definitely make camping with eight children safer. Here's a preview.