Jennifer Lopez just fell during her performance at the American Music Awards, which now gives everyone an excuse to care about this poor-man's Grammys.

• Mariah Carey must be determined to earn back the title of "world's most demanding diva." For an appearance at a London shopping shopping center to kick off the holiday season, she asked for 20 white kittens, 100 white doves, and confetti shaped like butterflies. She also requested a Rolls-Royce, pink carpet, pink podium, and a security staff of 80 to protect her entourage of 15. Then again all she asked for in her dressing room were a few bottles of water, so it isn't as if she's totally out of control, is it? [NYDN, DM]
• Jude Law made the unfortunate decision to move into a building next to an NYU dorm and he hasn't been too happy about the students who invariably look down on him as he plays with his kids or works out with his trainer. When Law recently noticed students waving at him from across the way, he responded by pelting their windows with oranges. That'll do it! [NYP]
• Madonna is still saving the world. But she isn't taking any chances while she does it, clearly. She insisted on wearing a bullet-proof vest under her jacket while touring a "lawless" Rio de Janeiro favela recently. [P6]
• Lindsay Lohan's gig at Emanuel Ungaro may be coming to an end soon. The company's chairman reportedly wants her out since he, like the rest of the world, wasn't impressed with the "cheesy and dated" outfits she debuted at Paris Fashion Week, and many stores are refusing to carry the line. Ungaro CEO Mounir Moufarrige wants to keep her, though, to save face. [P6]

• Nic Cage has been having some money troubles as of late and he recently sued his business manager for allegedly mishandling his finances. Now the manager is striking back. He's filed a countersuit against Cage and claims the actor is an out-of-control spender who, in just the last few years, has picked 15 different homes around the world, 22 cars (including 9 Rolls-Royces), four yachts, a jet, and a Caribbean island. Oh, and Cage also blew a fortune by constantly hosting "Gatsby-style parties at his residences." [WSJ]
• Paris Hilton's plan to remake her image and position herself as more "mature" isn't off to a very good start. The cops had to be called to her house in LA last night after she and boyfriend Doug Reinhardt had a nasty fight. [TMZ]
• Wannabe reality TV star Tinsley Mortimer and "wannabe socialite" Devorah Rose got into "a fight" the other night. Fortunately, two cameras were rolling the entire time, so you'll get to see it yourself in about 6 months. [P6]
• The co-owner of Table 8 at the Cooper Square Hotel is under suspicion for secretly giving his girlfriend a drug to force her to have an abortion and may soon be charged with killing the couple's unborn child. Grim. [NYDN]
• Charlie Gibson claims he has "tremendous respect" for his ABC colleague Diane Sawyer, but he supposedly "badmouths her openly and often" behind the scenes. An ABC spokeswoman called the claims "bullsh*t," while a less excitable Gibson said it was all "just silly." [P6]

Carrie Prejean is horrifed by Shauna Sand's attempt to inspire her; Bijou Phillips' incest movie was a lot less creepy before Mackenzie wrote that book; 50 Cent has some tattoos removed. Et voila, Wednesday's gossip!

• Was Lindsay Lohan dating Heath Ledger at the time of his death? That was what came out yesterday when the latest clip from Michael Lohan's vast archive of recorded phone conversations was posted online. (Dina Lohan can be heard expressing concern that Lindsay was headed down the same path.) On tap for today? A call between Dina and Michael in which she tells her ex-husband that Lindsay has been cutting herself. [NYDN, NYP, Radar]
• Alleged David Letterman extortionist Robert "Joe" Halderman appeared in court yesterday where his lawyer asked a judge to drop all the charges against the former news producer. The reason? Halderman's $2 million demand wasn't blackmail, silly. It was a legitimate business proposal in which Letterman could have first dibs on his screenplay, naturally. [NYP, NYDN, TMZ]
• Rihanna says she put on the tightest dress she could find to pick up Glamour's Woman of the Year award on Monday night at Carnegie Hall. She also spent $50,000 flying in her mom, aunts and brothers from Barbados to join her at the event. One person who was missing from the festivities: Her dad, who RiRi recently said abused her mom while growing up. [P6, NYDN]

• A judge has granted a temporary restraining order barring Jennifer Lopez's ex, Ojani Noa, from distributing a sex tape starring his former wife/benefactor. The order is only in effect for a day and another hearing is scheduled for today, so J. Lo's sex-filled 1997 honeymoon may still see the light of day yet. [TMZ, Reuters]
• Malaysian party boy (and clubland savior) Jho Low celebrated his 28th birthday last week at Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas with "bikini-clad party girls and surrounded by caged lions and tigers." Later, he partied with Paris Hilton, Usher, and Jamie Foxx, who reportedly "gifted the birthday boy" with a red sports car for some reason. Apparently, Low is often mistaken for photographer Chance Yeh, so make sure you don't get these two mixed up. A tip: Low is one buying 120 bottles of Cristal. [P6]
• Robert "Joe" Halderman, the guy accused of trying to extort David Letterman, appears in court today and his lawyer is expected to ask the judge to dismiss some of the charges against him. How long he'll be able to afford a lawyer is unclear. He's raised $100,000 for his legal defense fund, but he was also suspended without pay by CBS recently, too. [NYP, MSNBC]
• Madonna wants to clear a few things up: Yes, she's going to Brazil, but no, it's not to meet Jesus Luz's mom. She's going "strictly for fundraising and humanitarian purposes," thank you very much. [P6]

• Are Beyoncé and Jay-Z making plans to have a baby? Perhaps. In a recent interview, Jay "let it slip that procreating is high on the duo's priority list right now." [NYDN]
• Madonna seems to be taking the next step with boyfriend Jesus Luz. She's reportedly jetting to Brazil to meet Luz's parents, including his mom who happens to be fifteen years younger than Madonna. This shouldn't be awkward at all! [Sun]
• Michael Lohan hasn't been sharing his daughter's dramatic phone calls with the world out of the goodness of his heart. He apparently first tried to sell them to various TV networks for $100,000, but ended up striking a deal with Radar, which has Gosselin giving them up for free but getting paid for an interview. Meanwhile, the latest Lohan phone call has been released. [P6, Radar]

Jon and Kate Gosselin are basically the worst people in the history of TV. Pennsylvania pride! Scott Weiland's wife: a crazy-awesome smack addict. Kanyeezy's community serveezy. J-Lo's Lola gives me facehurt. Weirdos! Celebrities! Whatever! Presenting your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:

Rachel Weisz and Darren Aronofsky in Noho pushing their son Henry in a stroller ... Karolina Kurkova shopping in SoHo ... Hamish Bowles walking uptown ... Shia LaBeouf walking to the set of Wall Street 2 ... Terrence Howard leaving the Gramercy Park Hotel ... Naomi Watts carrying her son in SoHo ... Times photographer Bill Cunningham taking pictures on the UES ... socialite Genevieve Jones walking her dog in SoHo ... Taylor Momsen shooting scenes for Gossip Girl in Queens ... Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony posing for photos outside the Pierre Hotel ... and David Blaine riding a motorcycle in SoHo.

• After another wild day in court, Christie Brinkley and Peter Cook settled their latest round of legal issues yesterday. But not before Brinkley called her ex an "extreme narcissist," and Cook returned the favor by telling reporters she was an "angry, bitter, vindictive woman." At least it's nice to know they still have feelings for each other, though! [NYP, NYDN]
• As easy as it is to picture Courtney Love sitting in front of her computer punching numbers into an Excel spreadsheet, it turns out she may not be the best financial planner in the world. Love owes $300K in back taxes, according to the government. [TMZ]
• Michael Lohan says he knows who Lindsay's drug dealer is and he plans to reveal all in an effort to "save" his daughter. So who is he? "He has no job. He does nothing. All he does is supply everyone in LA." Call us crazy, but supplying "everyone" in LA sounds like a pretty good job to us. [Radar, NYDN]
• Get ready to see a lot more of Megan Fox dressed in, well, not much: Giorgio Armani has tapped her to star in his new underwear ad campaign. [WWD]

• The gloves are off in the divorce between ex-model Stephanie Seymour and mogul Peter Brant. He claims she blows through $257,000 a month (including $50K a month on clothing alone); has been stealing and/or smashing some of his "pricey art objects"; has a history of abusing drugs; and has been bringing her boyfriend to the house. Team Seymour has yet to respond with its side of the story, but you can be sure it's going to be equally salacious. [P6]
• In other news of warring exes, Christie Brinkley and Peter Cook are back at it. Cook's lawyer says Brinkley violated the couple's divorce settlement and should go to jail because of it. Brinkley's team says it was Cook who is at fault and he should be put in jail. At least they agree on one thing! [NYP]
• Madonna supposedly has real estate brokers hunting for an apartment for Jesus Luz, since she's not ready to have him move in with her. Meanwhile, ex-husband Guy Ritchie has finally gotten around to responding to Madonna's comments that he's "emotionally retarded." In an interview with Esquire, Ritchie responded, "I still love her. But she's retarded, too." [Sun, Esquire]
• Did you know that Dina Lohan has a "celebrity" shoe line called Shoe-Han? She does! And it will be unveiled today at Trump Plaza. Exciting! [P6, People]

In case the first dozen didn't satisify your desire to smell like a pop star past her prime, Jennifer Lopez has another perfume coming out this week called "J. Lo Glow." (Be sure not to confuse it with previous scents like "Glow by J. Lo," "My Glow," "Sunkissed Glow," or "Miami Glow.") As part of the ad campaign for the new perfume, People reports that "Jennifer naturally assumes a maternal role in domestic scenes meant to reflect the coziness of the new floral fragrance." So to achieve this natural maternal role—and convey what Lopez says is a natural feeling of "intimacy and love"—Lopez must have posed with her own twins, right? Naturally, no. They're actors. [People]

• Does Lindsay Lohan have a beef with Taylor Momsen? At the G-Star show on Tuesday night, LiLo (with sister Ali in tow) refused to pose for pics and then started casting aside seating cards for celebs like Juliette Lewis, Christian Siriano, and Gossip Girl emo teen Taylor Momsen. When event staff intervened, Lindsay got all aggro and dropped an F-bomb, naturally. But give the girl a break. She was apparently just trying to position herself near her crush, True Blood’s Ryan Kwanten. [P6, NYDN]
• At the G-Star after-party at the Bowery Hotel later that night, Mischa Barton was a little unsteady on her feet and was slurring her words. She then hit the DJ booth, where she "danced in her own world" for an hour. [P6]
• While other celebs were at Fashion Week, Chris Brown rocked a neon orange vest over, quite appropriately, a wife-beater, back home in Richmond, Virginia. He started his year-long community service for assaulting Rihanna by picking up trash and cleaning police horse stables. Next up, graffiti removal and washing cars! [Us, NYDN]

• Madonna is taking her kids on the best summer vacation ever later this month: She's thinking about taking them to visit Auschwitz, so "they can learn about mistakes made in the past." If that doesn't pan out, she could always just invite Sean Penn and Guy Ritchie over for a visit and teach them the same lesson, couldn't she? [YNET]
• Paula Abdul announced over Twitter last night that she's leaving American Idol. True? Was she just drinking again? We'll find out soon enough. [NYDN]
• Hopeless romantic Kelly Bensimon made a move on Gerard Butler the other night, but the actor didn't reciprocate. Try your best to empathize. [NYDN]
• Great news: Ratings for Jon & Kate Plus 8 have tanked since the show came back from hiatus. Say a little prayer that this continues. [Us]
• Nominations for the MTV Video Music Awards were announced yesterday; Beyoncé and Lady Gaga came out on top, each earning nine nods. [THR]

IRS authorities are after Nick Cage, Clooney shows off his new lady-friend, Jude Law met the mother of his latest child on the street at 4am, Britney Spears has a new do and a Sopranos movie is in the works.

Jude Law has knocked up an unnamed lady-friend, Mel Gibson attacks someone in a club, George Clooney has an Italian "lapdance model" by his side, Mischa Barton's friends are worried about her and Amy Winehouse's dad fakes a heart attack.

• Jude Law's rep says that the actor recently found out that he's expecting a fourth child. The mom? She's "an unidentified former lover." Congrats? [EW, People]
• It was less than two weeks ago that Mischa Barton was put under psychiatric care after she going on a drug-fueled bender and suffering a breakdown. Now she's in NYC, putting in long hours playing a character with a drug problem. Maybe this isn't the best idea? [NYDN]

Beyonce walking into Ricky's to do a little shopping ... Anne Hathaway and boyfriend Adam Shulman talking a walk in the East Village ... Jennifer Aniston eating a salad on the set of The Bounty ... Rihanna and Katy Perry eating dinner at Philippe ... Demi Lovato getting out of an SUV in front of her hotel ... Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony walking in the West Village, and later posing for photos outside J.Lo's birthday party ... Julia Roberts leaving her trailer on the set of her new movie downtown ... Freida Pinto walking back to her hotel after dinner with Dev Patel ... Agyness Deyn walking under an umbrella with a friend ... Kate Hudson sitting with son Ryder and Alex Rodriguez's daughter Natasha at the Yankees game ... Rachel McAdams filming scenes for Morning Glory ... and Jon Gosselin hanging out with Michael Lohan and Lohan's girlfriend in the Hamptons.

• Poor J. Lo. She threw a big 40th birthday party for herself over the weekend and some guests actually had the nerve to show up late! [NYDN]
• It's been a rough ride for Kate Major, the former Star reporter who said she was Jon Gosselin were in love. On Saturday, Gosselin said he was single; on Sunday, the tabloids suggested Major was a former escort. So now she's supposedly planning to get revenge by writing a tell-all. [People, NYDN, NYDN]
• In other Gosselin news, he was seen buying himself $950 wingtips over the weekend, or "two pairs of shoes for each of his kids." [P6]
• Although they've been dating for months now (and haven't exactly been doing a very good job of keeping their relationship a secret), Kate Hudson and A-Rod went public with their romance on Saturday. [NYDN]

It's a big birthday for Jennifer Lopez. She's celebrating the big 4-0 today. Other people who will be blowing out candles this fine Friday: Broadway star Kristin Chenoweth is turning 41. Anna Paquin is 27. Director Doug Liman turns 44. Director Gus Van Sant is turning 57. Billionaire investor Nelson Peltz is 67. Artist Alex Katz is turning 82. Senator Claire McCaskill is 56. Governor Charlie Crist of Florida is 53. Barry Bonds turns 45. Retired basketball stars Rick Fox and Karl Malone are turning 40 and 46, respectively. Michael Richards of Seinfeld fame is turning 60. Actor Dan Hedaya is 69. And Wonder Woman—actress Lynda Carter—celebrates her 58th birthday today. Weekend birthdays after the jump.