Vertically-challenged Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad either has some pretty bad luck when it comes to being near oddly-timed explosions, or someone doesn't like him. Last August, someone tossed a grenade set off celebratory fireworks next to Ahmadinejad's motorcade. And today, at the inauguration of an oil refinery, an explosion killed two people right before Ahmadinejad was to give a speech. State-run media says it's no big deal. And, it turns out, someone should have listened to the damn Germans:

Why has Iran suffered through so many droughts over the last few years? Many people would say "weather patterns, or whatever." But Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad knows the truth! "Western countries have designed plans to cause drought in certain areas of the world," he said in a speech in the Iranian city of Arak. And not only that! "European countries are using special equipment to force clouds to dump" rain on their own countries.

An influential former supporter of Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Ayatollah Mohammad Taghi Mesbah Yazdi, told the Iranian magazine Shoma that the president has been acting "unnaturally" due to a spell that was cast by his main adviser, Esfandiar Rahim Mashaei.

The "unprecedented" power struggle in Iran between its supreme leader, Ayatollah Khamenei, and President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad could lead to the latter's imminent resignation. Here's a great briefing on the dirty politics behind all of this, including yesterday's witchcraft arrests.

An ongoing fight between Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and supreme leader Ayatollah Khamenei has taken a turn for the weird, as several of the president's closest advisers have been arrested and charged with being "magicians" and invoking djinns, or spirits.

The mysterious Stuxnet worm may have kicked the crap out of Iran's Bushehr nuclear reactor last August. Now, Iranian's commander of civil defense says they have discovered a new virus called "Stars."

Lawmakers in Iran have proposed a bill that would make it illegal to own dogs because they're filthy and gross, according to a new report in Time. A leading cleric in the past has publicly denounced "short-legged" and "holdable" canines, and, if the law passes, the government could soon begin confiscating dogs from their owners. But there's more to it than just trying to keep the country's streets clean:

On tonight's Factor, brand new birther Donald Trump chatted with Bill O'Reilly about Iraq, Iran, Libya, and that dirty socialist Barack Obama. Trump's solution for the Middle East? 1) Stay there, 2) hoard the oil, 3) ???????, 4) profit!

In the four years since its unveiling, the graffiti-inspired logo for the 2012 London Olympics has been accused of looking like many thing: The Waffen SS insignia, for instance, or Lisa Simpson giving head. And now, because why not, the Iranian Olympic committee has gotten into the game and accused the logo of spelling out "Zion." The organizers must be huge Bob Marley fans! Or, if you listen to the Iranians, it's a secret pro-Israel message. How surprising, that the Iranian government is making noise about something bizarre and tenuously related to Jews! We still think it looks more like the Lisa Simpson blowjob thing. [NYDN]

Two ships from the Iranian navy passed through the Suez Canal today en route to the Mediterranean. Quick — someone check John Bolton's blood pressure!

After killing protesters in their sleep, Bahrain's ruling monarchy says demonstrators can stay in Pearl roundabout and they've offered to hold talks with all opposition members. Yemen is still going off, and Human Rights Watch says 84 people have been killed in Libya over the last three days. Here's a look at what's happening across the Middle East and North Africa.

Around 50 members of Iran's parliament today called for the execution of opposition leaders Mir Hossein Mousavi and Mehdi Karroubi for being "corrupt on earth" — a charge that carries the death penalty — after the two men urged their supporters to protest in support of the revolution in Egypt. Tehran's police chief claims that "some police and security personnel were shot by [protesters] and nine security forces men and some other people were wounded in this incident."

Whatever coalition remains from the defeated Iranian uprisings of 2009 hit the streets again today for demonstrations, hoping to build on momentum from the 2011 Tunisia-Egypt Wave of Freedom Everywhere. After all, the Iranian regime had been encouraging the demonstrations in Egypt; why shouldn't it allow such protests in its own streets? Because then the Iranian regime might get overthrown, duh.

Following the popular uprisings in Tunisia and Egypt, countries all across the Middle East and North Africa are seeing small but growing anti-government protests, proving that the status quo is no longer sustainable. Here's a quick look at what's happening today in the region:

Iran's grandmaster of chess, 28-year-old Ehsan Ghaem Maghami, claims to have broken the Guinness world record for simultaneous games yesterday in Tehran, according to AFP. Maghami faced 614 opponents in just over 25 hours — winning 590, or 96 percent of the games. He also paced around the tables for a total of 34 miles.

Shane Bauer and Josh Fattal go on trial tomorrow in Iran for spying and trespassing, but aren't allowed to see their lawyer beforehand.

Any single event that happens on Earth is, to former U.N. Ambassador and possible presidential candidate John Bolton, another reason to bomb Iran immediately. So what's his rationale for bombing Iran immediately in the case of, say, Egyptian protests?

Two Iranians have been sentenced to death for running porn sites. One man was convicted of "designing and moderating adult content websites" and "insulting the sanctity of Islam." Hugh Hefner should send a squad of Playboy bunnies to rescue them.

To stop the spread of Western culture, Iranian officials have banned the sale or production of any goods related to Valentine's Day, which has become increasingly popular with Iranian youth. Would it be possible to introduce a similar moratorium here?

Rudy Giuliani and several former Bush Administration officials who were criticized last week for attending a rally for what the State Department says is a terrorist organization—which was probably illegal—have responded. They say their terror group doesn't count.