immigration

Texas Will Crush You For Hiring Illegal Aliens, Unless They're Maids

Jim Newell · 03/03/11 06:04PM

A bill that's been introduced in the Texas state legislature would finally, at long last, put an end to illegal aliens taking American jobs. If any of you Texans think you can get away with hiring an "unauthorized alien" on the cheap, this bill would make that punishable by up to two years in prison and a $10,000 fine. Is that clear enough? No hiring of illegals! Although there is one small loophole in the bill: "Unauthorized alien" domestic workers, like maids, caretakers, lawnboys, and so on, would still be totally legal to hire.

'Minuteman' Convicted of Murdering Nine-Year-Old

Max Read · 02/15/11 03:10AM

On Monday, a jury in Tucson found former beautician Shawna Forde guilty of killing nine-year-old Brisenia Flores and her father Raul in a bizarre paramilitary raid on the Flores home in 2009. Forde, the leader of a group called "Minutemen American Defense," is what you might call an anti-immigration activist, if you include murdering fourth-graders under your definition of "activism"; two years ago, she and two of her fellow "minutemen" burst into the home of the Flores family, apparently looking for drugs that they planned on using to fund their creepy military games, and shot Raul, Brisenia, and Brisineia's mother Gina. Gina survived by playing dead and later testified against Forde.

Arizona Sues Feds Over Stupid Law

Max Read · 02/11/11 02:24AM

In the wake of a federal judge's ruling that parts of Arizona's crazy immigration law are unconstitutional, the state has decided to sue the federal government for "failing to secure the border." The nation collectively rolls its eyes. [KTAR]

Tea Party Senator Ready to Violate Constitution

Max Read · 01/28/11 03:59AM

I don't know if you've noticed, but a lot of people are becoming citizens without "respecting our immigration laws" or "following the rules." These people are called babies. And Sen. Rand Paul (R - Ky.) is doing something about them.

'Virtual Fence' Scrapped After Wasting $1 Billion

Jeff Neumann · 01/15/11 09:26AM

After blowing $1 billion on an electronic "virtual fence" along the border with Mexico, the Department of Homeland Security yesterday finally ditched the $7 billion project in favor of surveillance drones and human patrols. Bravo, DHS. Money well spent. [NYT]

Salma Hayek Was an Illegal Immigrant

Maureen O'Connor · 12/08/10 04:01PM

Did Salma Hayek just solve the polarized war over immigration? By admitting that she, too, was once an undocumented worker, Salma clearly enunciated the vital role of immigrant workers who happen to have sexy breasts.

Green Cards: Still a Good Bet

Hamilton Nolan · 11/22/10 12:17PM

The U.S. State Department's green card lottery this year drew a record 15 million applications for 50,000 available green cards. Which means this lottery's odds are approximately 150,000 times better than the New York Lottery's odds . [WSJ]

No Immigrants, No Restaurants: Our Snacking Future

Hamilton Nolan · 09/08/10 11:20AM

Americans: what the hell are we eating? Sometimes we wonder that, as we idly stuff any nearby foodstuffs into our maws while in a glassy-eyed, dreamlike state. The problem: we hate immigrants, but love food. What to do?