We love tales of people acting stupid. All the better when they are doing stupid things amidst natural splendor. So this New York Times article about people being stupid in National Parks is delightful.

A 19-year-old bank robber in Germany emailed newspapers to correct factual errors about his recent heist. Police traced the email and arrested him. This guy should be an honorary inductee in the non-existent Fact-checkers Hall of Fame. [Reuters] (via Bullfightsonacid)

Hello, My name is Dumbass McGee. I was reading the Huffington's Post today and was completely surprised by this article which said Vitaminwater is not healthy, even though the name of the product has "Vitamin" in it! Help?

Rush is always so right about everything, isn't he? Well, not today! Rush decided to be as much of an ass as possible, claiming that the media's been "celebrating" Michelle Obama's Spanish vacation because of guilt over our "slave past."

Have you heard about the New Black Panther Party? No? Well, you must not be watching Fox News, which has spent the last week treating the fringe group as the greatest threat to democracy since... well, since health care reform.

Rush Limbaugh's touching tribute to deceased Yankees owner George Steinbrenner: "That cracker made a lot of African-American millionaires!" Sure: Don Mattingly, Joe Torre, Andy Pettitte, Roger Clemens...Come on, fat boy. At least be human. Remember Donovan McNabb? [Media Matters]

Remember John Fitzgerald Page? He's the "actor/model" who is the undisputed Worst Person in the World thanks to his dickish online dating habits and terrible website. Now he's attempting to extort a 19 year-old girl.

Apparently weight gain, missed cycles, and feeling all pregnant and stuff is not enough warning for today's couples on the go. It's a bad sign when even your dramatic reenactment shows you confused by what comes out of a uterus.

Oh, this is beautiful. You know, in a holy-sh*t-how-is-this-guy-so-stupid way. Anyway, here's a dumb racist guy's webcam tirade, in which he argues that soccer is AMERICA'S PATH TO SOCIALISM. Socialism, Satan, sodomy, soccer... they all start with "S!" Video inside.

Congressman Louis Gohmert (R - TX, of course), who compared Obama to Hitler last week, has uncovered a devious plot: Pregnant terrorists, immigrating to the U.S. and having American-citizen-terrorist babies. Louie Gohmert: Voting on laws that affect you every day!

Surprise: Sarah Palin, too, loves that Thomas Sowell column about why Barack Obama setting up a $20 billion BP claims fund makes him literally Hitler. This is why Sarah Palin is one of the most unpopular political figures in America.

Incredibly narrow, self-centered Washington socialite Sally Quinn still has access to the Washington Post publishing system, apparently, and has tricked an editor into running her latest stupid, hilarious column: why Joe Biden and Hillary Clinton should (and will) switch jobs.

Yesterday officials from Washington "left little doubt that the Obama administration is prepared to go to court if necessary in a bid to block the new law." Governor Jan Brewer said she'd take it to the Supreme Court. [AP]

We always laugh when, say, someone's arrested for brazenly offering weed for sale on Craigslist. Our apologies to those fools. It turns out that the dumbest criminals of all are trying to pull off insider trading. Very, very poorly.

Today's New York Times takes on the problem of Larry King. Specifically, the problem that no one is watching him. But that's not just Larry King's problem! His whole network has that problem. Because it is awful.

You know what someone should do something about? All those Muslims who are desperate to escape their religion but just haven't found the courage to do it because Islam is so violent. Luckily this blogger woman will save the day!

James O'Keefe, famed young fake ACORN pimp and Breitbart employee, has been found guilty of a misdemeanor for tampering with Sen. Mary Landrieu's office phones, in a "caper." Thunderous self-righteous Breitbart Twitter explosion...already here. [WP]

A Manhattan Community Board will back a plan for a Muslim community center near the WTC site. Angry people gathered to protest the Muslim plot to provide a "500-seat performing arts center, a culinary school, [and] a swimming pool." [NYT]

Girls Gone Wild's Joe Francis—the last man we can safely call a douchebag—sent us some half-literate legal threats after we named him Douche of the Decade. What's Joe up to now? Sending half-literate legal threats to bloggers, still.

Fox News (who are admittedly pushing this angle) report that Utah, Rhode Island, Texas and Georgia are taking steps towards show-us-your-papers laws like Arizona's. They make no mention of an upcoming election, and the cynical political appeal of being 'tough'.