Yesterday—after an anecdotal story about black women receiving hair pat-downs—we asked you, the traveling public, whether you've experienced racial profiling at the hands of the freedom-protecting TSA.

Let's just deal with the Rick Perry hair situation right here and now to get it out of the way: It is beautiful and lush, perfectly coiffed, and the source of his 10 straight election wins.

Gov. Goodhair may have a touch of gray these days, but Jack Shafer, for one, would still molest him. And now you can meet his famous hair stylist/barber/whatever, Dixie, in this clip! Her trick: She uses scissors. No, that's just normal. She uses witchcraft, let's say.

A job for you, perpetually outraged internet hordes! In the New York Times today, Joe Sharkey writes a purely anecdotal story suggesting that the TSA may be racially profiling protecting Americans by patting down black women's hair. Is it true?

Tom Offer-Westort used to be a guy with a big shaggy beard and shoulder-length hair. Now, he's... not. Luckily for the internet, his friend, filmmaker Peter Simon, made sure he did the big shave "in style," and created this nice little video—kind of a Vimeo Peanut-Butter Solution—of the event. Enjoy it, before Norelco turns it into an ad. [via Reddit]

Fish lead! Sperm coats! Bald hair! Tall cancer! Dissolving tobacco! Tortoise leg! Calorie counts! Lung damage! And the fatalistic approach to our own mortality! It's your Thursday Health Watch, where we watch your heath—soberly!

At last night's Much Music Awards, Lady Gaga took her wig fetish to its logical next step with neon turquoise pit and pube wigs. The carpet matches the drapes matches the—hmm—valances? Tapestries? Terry cloth toilet cover?

Mercury planet! Rat memories! Gray hair! Cosmic blast! Killer lipids! Mind engagement! Cuban seas! Model blimps! And the real reason that women be squeakin! It's your Friday Science Watch, where we watch science—salaciously!

The whole country has gone feather-hair-extensions mad-so mad that women are descending like locusts upon fly-fishing shops nationwide looking for hackles, those feathery-things that can double as hair accessories. This report from the Seattle Times starts out so ominously, you can almost hear the duh-duh-dun punchline in the background.

It's obviously not uncommon for a barber to cut a customer's ear. With scissors. James Dillard, a 40-year-old barber from Trenton, NJ, allegedly cut his customer's ear in half on Thursday. With his teeth.

Brazilian police are looking for a thief who allegedly stole a woman's hair while she waited in line at a bus stop. Not, like, by pulling it out! The man apparently used a "knife-like weapon to cut the hair while the woman turned her back to him (she "thought the man was going to steal her purse"). Police believe that it will be sold to some kind of shady wig-maker, which is, all things considered, the least-gross possibility.

Donald Trump let Rolling Stone in on his hair routine: "OK, what I do is, wash it with Head and Shoulders. I don't dry it, though. I let it dry by itself. It takes about an hour."

Are we really doing this? Yes, it looks like we are. Little Mermaid hair is officially "in," according to Rihanna, Blake Lively, and Scarlett Johansson. To achieve this look, soak your hair in red Kool-Aid, brush with sea salt, and rumple to taste.

Jim Carrey, that nearly forgotten relic of the '90s, tried to improve his image and box office relevance by getting himself a new haircut. It's not working.

Reality TV blowhard, presumptive presidential candidate, and personal brand run rampant Donald Trump has been offered a makeover for his infamously surreal hairstyle. We're sure he gets these offers all the time, but this one was made by Oprah Winfrey. It's good as done.

London-based artist Christina Christoforou has drawn hundreds of celebrities, rock stars, fictional characters, and famous personages in her unique style—using only their hair—for her new book Whose Hair? Can you guess who these coifs belong to?

Pop music thingamajig Lady Gaga is known for her crazy outfits, but it seems like she has a thing or two to learn about her beauty regiment. She goes to sleep in her makeup every night.

If you are picture-shy—as Texas resident Johnathan Washburn is—you are advised not to assault people who photograph you—as Mr. Washburn did—because then the police are required by law to take a picture of you, and give it to anyone who asks. Which is why you are loooking at a picture of Mr. Johnathan Washburn, courtesy the Austin Statesman and the Austin Police Department. (Washburn allegedly grew angry with a fellow who took a photo of his "mohawk" and demanded that the photograph be erased; the situation escalated to the point where Washburn hit the guy with his skateboard. It's unclear whether or not the offending photograph survived the assault, but Washburn's mug shot more than makes up for it.) [Austin Statesman via The Daily What]

In a promo for tonight's Zach Galifianakis-hosted SNL (see it here), the funnyman—famous for shaving his beard when he hosted last year—declared, "This time, I'm shaving off everything." He didn't—but he did close the show sporting a fauxhawk!

After hinting that he might on Twitter a few hours ago, we now have photo confirmation that miniature pop figurine Justin Bieber has done the unimaginable. The tiny wee creature has cut his famous hair. Gone is the shaggy sweep of tresses, replaced by a thickety bramble of mouse-brown locks. Will a nation weep? So far, his legions of Twitter fans seem to have rallied behind him in this confusing hour. A nation, no, a world, watches.

Behold: A rare sighting of John Travolta without his wig. In Hawaii celebrating his 57th birthday with wife Kelly Preston, Travolta sat on a swing and allowed the sea breeze to sweep through the small amount of hair he has left.