As the number of "Shit Girls Say" spin-offs increases (black girls, white girls, Asian girls, Asian guys, gay guys, black gay guys, Southern gay guys) the likelihood of something offensive happening approaches one.

New York Post hot teen lesbian sex fetish correspondent Andrea Peyser is writing about bitches and sluts today. Yes, it is a Thursday. "Step away from the TV, bitches. It isn't safe." Those are actually in fact the first two sentences of Andrea's column today. But wait for the positive message!

Deplorable news from our nation's child warehouse system: kids these days are being sexually harassed, by kids these days. Kids these days! Sometimes we seriously consider carpet bombing to be our best adolescent behavior management strategy.

Today in the Indian state of Maharashtra, about 285 girls received certificates, little bouquets, and—most importantly—brand-new names that don't mean "unwanted." Because that's what their names were, until today: Unwanted. And you thought Florida was a terrible name for a girl!

Girls—the middle school denizens who think they're so cute but they're not—are so stupid that they fill up their lockers with all types of dumb decorations, according to a report today by the New York Times.

Madame Tussauds unveiled a wax statue of Justin Bieber today. The resulting photos of people interacting with an uncanny lump of boy-shaped wax are sort of horrifying.

While we feel for the girl in this video (she'd just had her wisdom teeth removed), we can't help but laugh at her reaction to the procedure. One eye inexplicably open? Check! Incoherent babel? Check! Poor—albeit funny—thing.

Take note boys, this little girl knows what she wants. She refuses to settle down until she has a job even if he comes "running out" asking for her hand in marriage.

Is your tween daughter looking homely? Want to get her started wearing makeup as early as possible—but also want to be sure she only wears all-natural makeup? You begged for it. The Wal-Mart corporation delivered!

Here's a news report out of Karachi, Pakistan that features nineteen—yes, nineteen—college girls stuffing themselves into a Smart Car in order to be inducted into the Guinness Book of World Records, because why the hell not? Watch inside.

Here's a video of a bunch of girls (and probably a few guys) at the University of Rhode Island attacking the getaway car of a celebrity who visited the campus. The celebrity in question? Jersey Shore's DJ Pauly D. Sigh.

Ever wonder what model "go-sees" actually entail? Hear Ed Razek's input on the casting process and see new and seasoned models walk for producers. Some of these beauties are going to skyrocket come November 30th!

In Part 2 of our series sifting through the pages of Canadian mezzo-soprano Justin Bieber's autobiography First Step 2 Forever, we turn to his romantic side. The book educates us in the Bieber's chief pursuit: girls. So many girls.

When two guys battle to see who gets the title of "most unhooked bras" in under a minute, they both win. For the record, Thomas wins by unhooking 56 brassieres—perhaps the most action this man has ever seen?

A 12-year-old girl was arrested on Wednesday in Queens, New York as part of a huge NYPD drug bust that nabbed 42 other people. Maybe she was the ringleader! Probably not though, as drug rings are complicated and dangerous organizations.

The head-scratcher Minute To Win It had a special summer episode where they challenged sorority girls with beach-based games. The object here is to make sure the kite never drops, like the hackey sack in She's All That.

Chelsea Baker, 13, may be a girl but she plays like the boys. Having gone undefeated in her last four seasons, with a killer knuckle ball, she may be the most accomplished pitcher for her age, regardless of gender.

Is summer 2010 going by too quickly? Not enough time in the day for trend spotting? Fear Not! Boycrazy Alexi is here to introduce you to the latest trend in summer fashion: Sideboob! Not familiar? See Video.

Kid checkups! Organic fatties! Lazy docs! Sports carbs! Drunk teens! Rat Lungs! It's your predominantly factual Health Watch, where we watch your health—with the interest of a teenage girl amongst nerds!

Have you ever wondered what it would look like if an attractive girl popped a water balloon above her chest and the still-shaped bubble of H20 made its way down in slow motion? Well, wonder no more—video's inside.